feelings

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Accepting Compliments

It is interesting how many of us find it difficult to accept compliments but we find it easy to believe the slightest criticism. Let’s make a choice today to fully accept compliments as we would a gift. Sincere compliments are gifts of praise. They are virtual trophies given for wise choices or accomplishments or perhaps for just letting your light shine. There is no reason not to accept the gift of a kind word, but some of us argue against them, even giving reasons why they aren’t true.

person s holds brown gift box

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If we could see the energy of a compliment, we would see beautiful, shining, positive energy being sent from the giver. That energy, when accepted graciously, will brighten our personal energy field. Our gratitude for the compliment then returns to the giver as warm, fuzzy, glowing energy, completing an even circuit of good feelings. However, when we reject a compliment, what could have been a beautiful exchange becomes awkward and uncomfortable, making it a negative experience instead. Misplaced modesty can ruin the joy of sharing this connection with another person. But we can accept a compliment and still be modest by simply saying “thank you.”  However, if compliments are rejected due to a lack of self-esteem, then the first step would be to start believing good things about yourself.  Try giving yourself compliments in the mirror. Beyond the initial feelings of silliness, you will notice how good it feels and can watch the smile it puts on your face. The next step would be to see how it feels to give compliments to others.  Notice how great you feel when you’ve made another person’s face brighten and how differently you feel when the gift you’ve offered is rejected.  Having experienced all sides, you will be ready to accept compliments fully and willingly.

We are our harshest critics. When we accept compliments, we are reminded that others see us through different eyes. All living beings crave positive attention, and we all deserve to have positive energy shared with us.  When we happily and gratefully accept compliments, we give others permission to do so as well.

I would love to hear from you about your experiences.

I offer coaching and mentoring to you – for you to make the changes you want to in your life. Build your confidence in your abilities.  Read my clients’ testimonials here. To help you to have more fun, more freedom and less stress. That is it. There is no catch. I believe in you.

Maggie Currie

maggieheart

Professional Transformational Coach, Consultant
Founder of MAGGIE CURRIE COACHING

Website:       http://www.maggiecurrie.co.uk

Facebook:    https://www.facebook.com/maggielifecoach/

Email:            hello@maggiecurrie.co.uk

 

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How to survive Valentine’s Day as a single person

Take advantage of you and really look after yourself on this day. Turn the focus of your attention to you. Buy yourself something special, something you will really love and appreciate. It maybe something that you wouldn’t usually think of buying for yourself, but on this occasion it feels right to do it. Here are some more suggestions for you to feel special on this loving day:

  • treat yourself to a day being pampered at the spa.
  • treat yourself to a special meal and enjoy it in the comfort of your own home. It can be a take away delivered to your door.  Use your favourite crockery, buy a bottle of wine and enjoy your chosen feast.
  • watch your favourite film or read a good book.
  • How about you and some of your best friends getting together to watch a few of the worst romantic comedy films you can find.  Have a fun evening with people you love to be with and who love to be with you.
  • Make a Valentine’s Day resolution to love yourself.  Resolve to take some evening classes or to go on that trip you have been promising yourself.  Resolve to try new restaurants or to try new recipes.  Make a resolution that you will make a start towards the dreams you know you want to achieve.
  • If you have children why not make the day special for them as well as you.  Buy some little gifts – chocolates, stuffed toys, model cars etc. – and make a present hunt game with clues, and they can fun trying to find the gifts and you will have fun watching them.
  • chocolates

Whatever it is you choose to do, whether it is on your own, with friends or with your children, make sure it is fun for you.

Do not:

  • Find a stranger to spend the night with.  You will regret it in the morning and make it worse for yourself when the next Valentine’s Day comes around.
  • Watch tv programmes filled with loves stories.
  • Get all dressed up at work as your colleagues will jump to conclusions and make your life a misery all day.
  • Sit at home being miserable and feeling sorry for yourself because you don’t have someone to share this sill day with.
  • Beat yourself up for feeling miserable and lonely.

A great thing to do would be to wait until February 15th and then treat yourself to a heart-shaped box of chocolates at half price, or buy some flowers for yourself for half price.

Remember, it is just one day.  It will all be over in the morning.

Plan your life around yourself and learn to really love yourself again.  This will not only be fun and interesting, but loving yourself is the basis of beginning your new life as the new, confident you.

I would love to hear from you about your experiences.

I offer coaching and mentoring to you – for you to make the changes you want to in your life. Build your confidence in your abilities.  Read my clients’ testimonials here. To help you to have more fun, more freedom and less stress. That is it. There is no catch. I believe in you.

Maggie Currie

maggieheart

Professional Transformational Coach, Consultant
Founder of MAGGIE CURRIE COACHING

Website:       http://www.maggiecurrie.co.uk

Facebook:    https://www.facebook.com/maggielifecoach/

Email:            hello@maggiecurrie.co.uk

 

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Courtesy

We often feel we don’t have the time or energy to offer small gestures that compose what we call common courtesy. It sometimes seems that this kind of social awareness belongs to the past, is unfashionable and seems outdated. Yet, when someone extends this kind of courtesy to us, we always feel touched. Someone who lends a helping hand when we are struggling with our shopping makes an impression because so many people pay no attention.  Even someone who simply makes the effort to look us in the eye, smile, and greet us properly when entering a room stands out of the crowd.  It seems these people carry with them the elegance and grace of another time, and we are always thankful for our contact with them. Common courtesy is a small gesture that makes a big difference.

two woman hugging each other

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An essential component of courtesy is awareness and common sense, looking at others rather than yourself to see when someone needs help or acknowledgment.  As a courteous person, you are aware that you are walking into a room full of people or that your waiter has arrived to take your order.  Then, awareness leads to action. It is usually quite clear what needs to be done, open the door for the woman holding the baby, move your car up two feet so another person can park behind you, acknowledge your sister’s shy boyfriend with a smile and some conversation, saying sorry if you bump into someone.  A third component is to give courtesy freely, without expecting anything in return.  People may not even take notice, much less return the kindness, but you can take heart in the fact that you are creating the kind of world you want to live in with your actions.

When you are out in the world, remember to be aware of others, lend your hand when one is needed, and give this help without an ulterior motive. Through these small actions, you make this world a better place in which to live.

I would love to hear from you about your experiences.

I offer coaching and mentoring to you – for you to make the changes you want to in your life. Build your confidence in your abilities.  Read my clients’ testimonials here. To help you to have more fun, more freedom and less stress. That is it. There is no catch. I believe in you.

Maggie Currie

maggieheart

Professional Transformational Coach, Consultant
Founder of MAGGIE CURRIE COACHING

Website:       http://www.maggiecurrie.co.uk

Facebook:    https://www.facebook.com/maggielifecoach/

Email:            hello@maggiecurrie.co.uk

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Choosing to have a partner or being single

The ways we choose to love can be as unique as the way we choose to stay healthy, entertain ourselves or make a living.  Some people choose to enter into a partnership with a special individual, while others find immense satisfaction in staying single. There is no right or wrong way to be in your life when it comes to deciding whether or not to be in a relationship, even though society as a whole tends to put an emphasis on romantic partnerships. Whether you choose to go through life as part of a romantic relationship or live as a single unit, there are benefits to both. Feel absolutely free to be comfortable with whatever choice is right for you.

man in black long sleeved shirt and woman in black dress

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Choosing to be single is a wonderful way to spend time discovering yourself.  You will have more time and space to discover what and how you want your life to be without having to keep someone else’s choices in mind.  Being single gives you the freedom to do what you want at a moment’s notice and the pride that comes with facing life on your own terms.  Companionship, support, and affection will be found while spending quality time with your friends, colleagues, and relatives.  There is also the fun that comes with being able to date many different people without having to make a commitment.  Choosing to have a partner, on the other hand, brings with it an opportunity to share your life with another person.  There is comfort in the knowledge that you are facing the world with someone as a united front.  When life is challenging, you are in a position to strengthen, as well as give each other comfort. There is also the inevitable transformation of self that comes from allowing another person to be so intimately a part of your life.

Remember that what is right for one person may not be right for another, and people can change their minds about wanting to be with another person or wanting to be alone many times over the course of their lives.  Whether you seek out a partner or live the single life, embracing it fully will ensure that either choice is as fulfilling as possible for you.

I would love to hear from you about your experiences.

I offer coaching and mentoring to you – for you to make the changes you want to in your life. Build your confidence in your abilities.  Read my clients’ testimonials here. To help you to have more fun, more freedom and less stress. That is it. There is no catch. I believe in you.

Maggie Currie

maggieheart

Professional Transformational Coach, Consultant
Founder of MAGGIE CURRIE COACHING

Website:       http://www.maggiecurrie.co.uk

Facebook:    https://www.facebook.com/maggielifecoach/

Email:            hello@maggiecurrie.co.uk

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False Beliefs

I expect there are many of us who have a deep-seated belief that to be able to do well in the world, we have to suffer and sacrifice. This commonly held thought stems from a certain mentality, inherited from ancestors who may have experienced or indeed believed this was true. This is often the way in which false beliefs take hold and don’t let go, even though they are no longer relevant. We must all live our own lives, in our own time, and learn what is true for us. Very few so called truths prove valid for all people all the time.

analysis blackboard board bubble

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Keeping our thoughts clear of false notions is not an easy task, since we need to first know our own beliefs. Very often, these beliefs have settled deep in our unconscious minds where they simply sit unquestioned. Nevertheless, they have an effect on our hearts, our minds, and our reality. These beliefs act on us, creating situations and relationships that we regard as fate, when they are, in fact, simply our unconscious minds manifesting in the external world. As a result, we may not even be aware that we are carrying the burden of a ‘can’t do’ mentality, and we may wonder why we are not able to achieve, especially when we know we deserve it. If this is the case, it is time to look deeper within to see if we can discover the obstacle inside ourselves.

In order for us to evolve, it is important that we examine the contents of our minds and hearts and get to the root of what we believe about reality. Generally, our concerns of the moment can be trusted to guide our inquiries. If we are not achieving as we know we deserve, then this issue is calling us to look into the hidden corners of our psyches and root out any remaining beliefs that tell us we must suffer and sacrifice in order to do well. Our efforts will take us one more step away from this energy-sapping belief that we no longer need.

When you want to learn to relax and have more fun in your life and less stress,  contact me and begin your journey. I would love to work with you.

I offer coaching and mentoring to you – for you to make the changes you want to in your life. Build your confidence in your abilities.  Read my clients’ testimonials here. To help you to have more fun, more freedom and less stress. That is it. There is no catch. I believe in you.

Maggie Currie

maggieheart

Professional Transformational Coach, Consultant
Founder of MAGGIE CURRIE COACHING

Website:       http://www.maggiecurrie.co.uk

Facebook:    https://www.facebook.com/maggielifecoach/

Email:            hello@maggiecurrie.co.uk

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Allow your loved ones to be human

Often when we fall in love with someone or we make a new friend, we can see that person in a glowing light. Their good qualities appear to dominate the foreground of our perception. And their negative qualities? They just don’t seem to have any. This temporary state is commonly known as putting someone on a pedestal. Often we put spiritual leaders and our gurus on pedestals. We have all done this to someone at one time or another, and as long as we remember that no one is actually “perfect,” the pedestal phase of a relationship can be enjoyed for what it is—a phase. It’s when we actually believe our own projection that troubles arise.

woman standing on road

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Everyone one of us has problems, flaws, and blind spots. When we entertain the illusion that someone is perfect, we don’t allow them room to be human, so when they make an error in judgement or act in contradiction to our idea of perfection, as the surely will, we become disillusioned. We may get angry or distance ourselves in response. In the end, they are not to blame for the fact that we idealised them. Granted, they may have enjoyed seeing themselves as perfect through our eyes, but we are the ones who chose to believe an illusion. Once we have been through this process a few times, we  learn that no one is perfect. We are all a combination of divine and human qualities and we all struggle. When we treat the people we love with this awareness, we actually allow for a much greater intimacy than when we held them aloft on this pedestal . The moment we see through our idealised projection is the moment we begin to see our loved one as he or she truly is.

We cannot truly connect with a person when we idealise them. In life, there are no pedestals—we are all walking on the same ground together. When we realise this, we can own our own humanity. This is the key to balance and wholeness within ourselves and our relationships.

When you want to learn to relax and have more fun in your life and less stress,  contact me and begin your journey. I would love to work with you.

I offer coaching and mentoring to you – for you to make the changes you want to in your life. Build your confidence in your abilities.  Read my clients’ testimonials here. To help you to have more fun, more freedom and less stress. That is it. There is no catch. I believe in you.

Maggie Currie

maggieheart

Professional Transformational Coach, Consultant
Founder of MAGGIE CURRIE COACHING

Website:       http://www.maggiecurrie.co.uk

Facebook:    https://www.facebook.com/maggielifecoach/

Email:            hello@maggiecurrie.co.uk

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Tending to our daily chores

In the very recent past, the term women’s work has come to have a derogatory connotation. Women’s work is said to encompass all the domestic chores that have historically been associated only with women such as cooking, cleaning and staying at home with the children. Whenever a person is limited to only certain kinds of work in a society, there is a need to break free from that work in order to inhabit a place of choice. However, when we choose to do alleged women’s work because we enjoy it, there is nothing degrading about it. There is an honour to it, and when done alone or in a group this work can be truly meaningful and fulfilling because the home is the foundation of security for all who live in it. The importance of tending the hearth that nurtures all who bask in its warmth cannot be overstated.

background blue close up clothes

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In addition to being essential to the functioning of the world, alleged women’s chores offer creative fulfilment, intimate interaction, and personal satisfaction. The more we become aware of the significance of this realm of labour, the more fulfilling it will be to those who do the work and those who benefit from it. A well-set table and a delicious, healthy meal can uplift and heal us on multiple levels. Clean, crisp sheets on a bed allow us to enter a deep slumber, inspiring a sense of safety and trust. Our mental, physical, emotional, and spiritual health all rest upon the smooth functioning of our homes.

The gift of women’s work, which still often comes from the hands of women, now also comes from fathers, husbands, and hired help. Whatever the source, our sincere gratitude upon receiving these treasures reminds us of the profound value of what is traditionally known as women’s work. The more we acknowledge the tremendous importance of this work, the more we are able to do it with a sense of pride, never feeling for a moment that our efforts are less significant or meaningful than those working outside the home—on the contrary, it is this work that makes all other work possible.

When you want to learn to relax and have more fun in your life and less stress,  contact me and begin your journey. I would love to work with you.

I offer coaching and mentoring to you – for you to make the changes you want to in your life. Build your confidence in your abilities.  Read my clients’ testimonials here. To help you to have more fun, more freedom and less stress. That is it. There is no catch. I believe in you.

Maggie Currie

maggieheart

Professional Transformational Coach, Consultant
Founder of MAGGIE CURRIE COACHING

Website:       http://www.maggiecurrie.co.uk

Facebook:    https://www.facebook.com/maggielifecoach/

Email:            hello@maggiecurrie.co.uk

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Blaming Others

When we understand that the world outside of us is a reflection of the world inside of us, we could feel confused about who is to blame for the problems in our lives. If we had a difficult childhood, we may wonder how we can take responsibility for that, and in our current relationships, the same question arises. We all know that blaming others is the opposite of taking responsibility, but we may not understand how to take responsibility for things that we don’t feel responsible for. We may blame our parents for our low self-esteem, and we may blame our current partner for exacerbating it with their unconscious behaviour. Objectively, this seems to make sense. After all, it is not our fault if our parents were irresponsible or unkind, and we are not to blame for our partner’s bad behaviour.

orange and white shoes

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Perhaps the problem lies with the action of blaming. Whether we blame others or blame ourselves, there is something aggressive and unkind about it. It sets up a situation in which it becomes difficult to move forward with the feelings of shame and guilt that arise. It also puts the resolution of our pain in the hands of someone other than us. Ultimately, we cannot insist that someone else take responsibility for their actions; only they can make that choice when they are ready. In the meantime, if we want to move forward with our lives instead of waiting around for something that may or may not happen, we begin to see the wisdom of taking the situation into our own hands. We begin to trust our innate thinking.

We do this by forgiving our parents, even if they have not asked for our forgiveness, so that we can be free. We end the abusive relationship with our partner, who may never admit to any wrongdoing, because we are willing to take responsibility for how we are treated. In short, we love ourselves as we want to be loved and create the life we know we deserve. We leave the resolution of the wrongs committed against us in the hands of the universe, releasing ourselves to live a life free of blame.

When you are ready to learn to relax and have more fun in your life,  contact me and begin your journey. I would love work with you.

I offer coaching and mentoring to you – for you to make the changes you want to in your life. Build your confidence in your abilities.  Read my clients’ testimonials here. To help you to have more fun, more freedom and less stress. That is it. There is no catch. I believe in you.

Maggie Currie

maggieheart

Professional Transformational Coach, Consultant
Founder of MAGGIE CURRIE COACHING

Website:       http://www.maggiecurrie.co.uk

Facebook:    https://www.facebook.com/maggielifecoach/

Email:            hello@maggiecurrie.co.uk

 

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The boundaries of experience

None of us is born with an instruction manual that provides explicit rules for thought and behaviour that will help us to navigate life successfully. To cope with the plethora of complexities to which all of humanity is subject, we each develop a set of habits and routines that ground us, and make us feel safe. Most of us know, whether instinctively or by experience, that changes can be uncomfortable, but we always learn and gain so much. Any initial discomfort we experience when expanding our comfort zones diminishes gradually as we become accustomed to change and begin to understand that temporary discomfort is a small price to pay.

close up photo of fallen leaves

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Your current comfort zone did, at one time, serve a purpose in your life. But it is representative of behaviours and patterns of thought that empowered you to cope with challenges of days past. Now, this comfort zone does little to help the growth you wish to achieve in the present. Expanding your comfort zone through personal growth of any kind can prepare you to take some larger leaps that will, in time, help you refine your purpose. Work your way outward at your own pace, and try not to let your discomfort interfere with your resolve. With the passage of each well-earned triumph, you will have grown and your comfort zone will have expanded to accommodate this evolution.

Whether your comfort zone is living with your parents, or perhaps being too shy to socialise, or maybe it’s not realising your capabilities, whatever it is, start small, and you will discover that venturing beyond the limited comfort zone you now cling to is not as stressful an experience as you imagined it might be. And the joy you feel upon challenging yourself in this way will nearly always outweigh your discomfort. As you continue to expand your comfort zone to include new ideas, activities, goals, and experiences, you will see that you are capable of stimulating change and coping with the fresh challenges that accompany it.

If you would like to begin to make changes in your life,  then contact me and begin your journey. I would love work with you.

I offer coaching and mentoring to you – for you to make the changes you want to in your life. Build your confidence in your abilities.  Read my clients’ testimonials here. To help you to have more fun, more freedom and less stress. That is it. There is no catch. I believe in you.

Maggie Currie

maggieheart

Professional Transformational Coach, Consultant
Founder of MAGGIE CURRIE COACHING

Website:       http://www.maggiecurrie.co.uk

Facebook:    https://www.facebook.com/maggielifecoach/

Email:            hello@maggiecurrie.co.uk

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Don’t Be a Target

When we are confronted in a hurtful way this often leave us feeling drained and confused. When someone attacks us emotionally, we often wonder what we did to rouse their anger, and take their actions personally. We might ask ourselves what we could have done to prompt them to behave or speak that way toward us. It’s important to remember that there are no real targets in an emotional attack and it is usually a way for the attacker to redirect their own uncomfortable feelings away from themselves. People will be overcome by strong emotions, like hurt or anguish, and may see themselves as victims and lash out at others as either a means of protection or to make themselves feel better. You may be able to protect yourself from an emotional attack by not taking the behaviour personally. First, however, get into a state of detachment that will provide you with some protection from the person who is attacking you. This will allow you to feel compassion for this person and remember that their behaviour isn’t about you it is about their need to vent their emotions.

green yellow and black round dart board with black background

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It can be difficult to remain unaffected by someone’s behaviour, but take a moment to breathe deeply and remind yourself that you didn’t do anything wrong, and you aren’t responsible for other people’s feelings. It may be this person is indirectly expressing a need to you—whether they are reaching out for help or wanting to be heard— and you may be able to stop the attack by getting them to talk about what is really bothering them.

You cannot control other people’s emotions, but you can control your own. If you sense yourself responding to their negativity, try not to let yourself. Keep your heart open to them, and they may let go of their defensiveness and yield to your compassion and openness.

When you would like find out more about your emotions, contact me and begin your journey. I would love work with you.

I offer coaching and mentoring to you – for you to make the changes you want to in your life. Build your confidence in your abilities.  Read my clients’ testimonials here. To help you to have more fun, more freedom and less stress. That is it. There is no catch. I believe in you.

Maggie Currie

maggieheart

Professional Transformational Coach, Consultant
Founder of MAGGIE CURRIE COACHING

Website:       http://www.maggiecurrie.co.uk

Facebook:    https://www.facebook.com/maggielifecoach/

Email:            hello@maggiecurrie.co.uk