It’s all about you

I don’t know about you, but this is one of my favourite times.  A time when I take stock of the last year and where that got me and when I start to look at the year ahead and get excited about everything that I’m doing and aiming for in this year.

I’ve noticed that I’m not alone in this.  Lots of people that I’ve spoken to in the past couple of weeks have been experiencing a mix of the dynamic “Right! the New Year is approaching and I’m going to do something different that’s going to make my life so much better!” and the well-known “Oh, but I’m too (insert the applicable response) ……..tired, broke, cold, miserable” excuse for inactivity.  Do you recognise that in yourself or anybody around you?

poutinggirl

Well, we’re going to look at how you can beat the winter blues simply by making it all about you.  So I suggest that if there is somebody close to you that’s walking around feeling miserable… send this to them quickly!  For those that have already beaten the blues and are charging ahead with making their plans for the coming year – well done!  You can also use these tips to add more energy to your resolve.

With the many different roles that we undertake in our lives these days, we can so easily get caught up in playing each one and everything it entails that, for a time, we lose ourselves in the mix.  It can feel like we’re doing everything for other people and nothing for ourselves.  What we do on a daily basis can stop being about choice and start being purely about obligation.  This can be particularly highlighted over the festive season when we drag ourselves up to go to yet another gathering when deep down we’d really like to stay in bed for a lay-in and really wish we’d never agreed to go in the first place!  No wonder so many people feel burnt out by the time they reach the New Year.

Well when New Year gets here, and some of the demands have lessened, it will be a great time to step back and bring the focus back to you.  Not only is it the simplest way of beating winter blues, it’s a great way to give an extra energy boost to your New Year plans and get next year off to the best start.

So be really honest with yourself, how good are you at focusing on you? How often do you put yourself before anything or anybody else?

For many of us, as we continue to juggle our commitments, obligations and other people’s needs, it’s not often enough.  Perhaps we feel that it’s selfish to focus on ourselves when there are so many other people and jobs demanding our attention.  But are we getting it wrong?  Think about it for a moment.  How differently would you feel if you put yourself first more often?  If you were to do more of what you wanted to do?  Would you feel more tired, stressed, time-poor, lacklustre?  Or would you feel quite the opposite?

screaming

Our energy levels are directly related to how we feel.  If we do little for ourselves we feel fed up, over-stretched, put upon and we tend to have low energy levels.  With low energy levels we feel less inclined to do the things we know we need to do, let alone anything else on top.  We also work more slowly and so become time-poor. Whereas if we consciously put ourselves first and look after our own needs and wants, we feel happier, more fulfilled, lighter and our energy levels soar.  When we have more energy we’re more productive so we get more done in the same or less time, making it possible to fulfil our commitments as well as looking after ourselves.

Sometimes we get so caught up with the roles we undertake, the commitments we have and the people around us, that we forget that we have a choice.  Try choosing one thing just for you, do it and see how different you feel.  See also the amazing knock-on effect that has.

tips

Top 5 Tips for Putting Yourself First

  1.  Don’t say ‘yes’ when you mean ‘no’!  How often do you do this? How does it feel?  Not good?  When you’re asked to do something, give it some thought and give an answer that’s true to you.  You will feel so much better when you say yes only  when you mean it.
  2. Do something different.  If you feel tired or over-committed, the chances are you didn’t choose to feel that way.  By consciously breaking your routine (even if it’s only for one day) and doing something out of the ordinary, you have taken back your right  to choose.  Choose something that will give you a buzz and see what a difference it makes.
  3. Know what gives you energy.  Make yourself a list of all the things that put a big smile on your face and make you feel great.  Things that are focused on and all about you.  Then when you need a boost you have a ready-made list of pick-me-ups to choose from.
  4. Set aside time for you, and only you, regularly.   Whether it’s signing up to a series of classes, doing an activity you really enjoy or simply setting aside a couple of hours at a time to do exactly as you please, that may include doing absolutely nothing.  You don’t have to do it alone, just make sure that whatever it is, you are doing it for you.  Put it in the diary and stick to it!
  5. Have a plan.  If you know what you’re aiming for and you have a plan for how you’re going to get there… you will have all the motivation you need to drive you forward with the focus firmly on you.  Imagine the energy that will create!

If anything resonates with you in this article, I will be delighted to hear from you, and of course be happy to help you.

I offer coaching and mentoring to you – for you to make the changes you want to in your life. To help you to have more fun, more freedom and less stress. That is it. There is no catch. I believe in you.

Maggie Currie

maggieheart

Professional Transformational Coach, Consultant
Founder of MAGGIE CURRIE COACHING

Website:       http://www.maggiecurrie.co.uk

Facebook:    https://www.facebook.com/maggielifecoach/

Email:            hello@maggiecurrie.co.uk

 

Making Life Work for You

Sometimes we have so many responsibilities in our lives, ranging from work obligations to caring for children to running a household, we feel we cannot possibly make it all work. We may feel overwhelmed in the face of it all, ending each day feeling hopelessly behind schedule. However, regardless of how frustrating this can be, these are the parameters that make up our lives, and we owe it to ourselves to find a way to make it work. Rather than buckling under the pressure of an impossible to-do list, take a moment to view the larger perspective.

to do list
Like the CEO of a large organisation, we must first realise that we can’t do every job ourselves. The first step to sanity is learning how to delegate some of the responsibility to other people, whether by paying someone to clean our house or trading childcare duties with another parent. In addition, we might find places where we can shift our expectations in ways that make our lives easier. For example, expecting ourselves to create a healthy home-cooked meal every night after a full day of work, errands, or caring for an infant or toddler may be a bit excessive. We might allow ourselves to get take away food once in a while without any guilt. Accepting the adjustments needed to make our lives work is an essential ingredient to being at peace with our situation.

At the end of the day, we must come to terms with changing what we can and accepting what we can’t change. Allow your innate thinking to guide you. Sometimes the laundry piles up, a sick child demands more of our attention than usual, and we temporarily get behind with our schedule. Accepting this momentary state of affairs and trusting in our ability to get back on track when the time is right, we gracefully accept our life as it is, letting go of perfectionism and embracing life as it stands.

If anything resonates with you in this article, I will be delighted to hear from you, and of course be happy to help you.

I offer coaching and mentoring to you – for you to make the changes you want to in your life. To help you to have more fun, more freedom and less stress. That is it. There is no catch. I believe in you.

Maggie Currie

maggieheart

Professional Transformational Coach, Consultant
Founder of MAGGIE CURRIE COACHING

Website:       http://www.maggiecurrie.co.uk

Facebook:    https://www.facebook.com/maggielifecoach/

Email:            hello@maggiecurrie.co.uk

Allowing Nature to Work

We all see things about ourselves, our relationships, and our world that we want to change. Often, this desire leads us to take action toward some inner work that we need to do or toward some external goal we want to achieve. Sometimes, without any big announcement or momentous shift, we wake up to find that change has happened, seemingly without us. This can feel like a miracle as we suddenly see that our self-esteem really does seem to be intact, or our partner actually is helping out around the house more. We may even wonder whether all of our hard work had anything to do with it, or if it just happened by way of grace.

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As humans, sometimes we have relatively short attention spans, and we can easily lose track of time. We may worry about a seedling in a pot with our constant attention and watering for several weeks only to find ourselves enjoying the blooms it offers and wondering when that happened, and how we didn’t notice it.  Nature, on the other hand, has infinite patience and stays with a thing all the way through its life. This doesn’t mean that our efforts play no part in the miracle of change – they do. It’s just that they are one small part of the picture that finally results in the flowering of a plant, the shifting of a relationship, the softening of our hearts.

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The same laws that govern the growth of plants oversee our own internal and external changes. We observe, consider, work, and wonder, tilling the soil of our lives, planting seeds, and tending them. Sometimes the hard part is knowing when to stop and let go, handing it over to the universe. Usually this happens by way of distraction or disruption, our attention being called away to other more pressing concerns. And it is often at these times, when we are not looking, in the silence of nature’s embrace, that the miracle of change happens.

If anything resonates with you from the above, I will be delighted to hear from you, and of course be happy to help you.

I offer coaching and mentoring to you – for you to make the changes you want to in your life. To help you to have more fun, more freedom and less stress. That is it. There is no catch. I believe in you.

Maggie Currie

maggieheart

Professional Transformational Coach, Consultant
Founder of MAGGIE CURRIE COACHING

Website:       http://www.maggiecurrie.co.uk

Facebook:    https://www.facebook.com/maggielifecoach/

Email:            hello@maggiecurrie.co.uk

Waiting For Someday

The time we are blessed with is limited and tends to be used up all too quickly. How we utilise that time is consequently one of the most important decisions we make. Yet it is far too easy to put off until tomorrow what we are dreaming of today.  The hectic pace of modern existence affords us an easy out; we shelve our aspirations so we can cope more effectively with the challenges of the present, ostensibly to have more time and leisure to realise our purpose in the future.  Or we tell ourselves that we will chase our dreams someday once we have accomplished other lesser goals.  In truth, it is our fear that keeps us from seeking fulfilment in the here and now.  And because we view failure as a possibility, our reasons for delaying our inevitable success seem sound and rational.  If we ask ourselves what we are really waiting for, however, we discover that there is no truly compelling reason why we should put off the pursuit of the dreams that sustain us.

Getting our lives back after divorce

When regarded as a question, “Why not now?” drains us of our power to realise our ambitions. We are so concerned with the notion that we are somehow undeserving of happiness that we cannot see that there is much we can do in the present to begin courting it. Yet when we look decisively at our existence and state, “Why not now, indeed!” we are empowered to begin changing our lives this very moment.

We procrastinate for many reasons, from a perceived lack of time to a legitimate lack of self-belief, but the truth of the matter is that there is no time like the present and no time but the present. Whatever we aim to accomplish, we will achieve it more quickly and with a greater degree of efficiency when we seize the day and make the most of the resources we have at our disposal presently.

All the joy, passion, and contentment you can envision can be yours right now, rather than in some far-flung point in time. You need only remind yourself that there is nothing standing between you and fulfilment. If you decide that today is the day you will take your destiny into your hands, you will soon discover that you hold the keys of fate.

Remember, someday is a not a day of the week.

If anything resonates with you from the above, I will be delighted to hear from you, and of course be happy to help you.

I offer coaching and mentoring to you – for you to make the changes you want to in your life. To help you to have more fun, more freedom and less stress. That is it. There is no catch. I believe in you.

Maggie Currie

maggieheart

Professional Transformational Coach, Consultant
Founder of MAGGIE CURRIE COACHING

Website:       http://www.maggiecurrie.co.uk

Facebook:    https://www.facebook.com/maggielifecoach/

Email:            hello@maggiecurrie.co.uk

Enjoying Your Age

In each stage of life, there are wonderful experiences we can savour and valuable insights we can absorb.  Every new decade and, in fact, every new year brings with it wisdom, transformation and growth, as well as ends and beginnings. Many people, however, believe that there is one age that eclipses the others. They expend energy trying to reach it and, once it has passed, trying to retain it. But wishing to be younger or older is a denial of the joys that have been and the joys yet to be, as well as the beauty of your life in the present.

Holding on to one age can make it difficult to appreciate each new milestone you reach. Taking pleasure in the delights of your age, whether you are in your 20s, 40s, 60s, or 80s, can help you see the magnificence and usefulness of the complex seasons of your life.

Each new year gifted to us by the universe is replete with exciting and unfamiliar experiences. In our 20s, we can embrace the energy of youth and the learning process, knowing it’s okay to not have all the answers. As we move through our third decade, we grow more self-assured as the confusion of our young adulthood melts away. We can honour these years by putting aside our fears of aging and concentrating instead on solidifying our values and enjoying our growing emotional maturity.  In our 40s, we become conscious of the wisdom we have attained through life experience and are blessed with the ability to put it to good use. We are not afraid to explore unfamiliar territory or to change.

old lady

 

In our 50s, we tend to have successfully navigated our midlife re-evaluations and have prioritised our lives. In the decades beyond, we discover a greater sense of freedom than we have ever known and can truly enjoy the memory of all we’ve seen and done.

Listen to your innate thinking and enjoy the age you are at now, for each age presents its own unique wisdom to savour.

If anything resonates with you from the above, I will be delighted to hear from you, and of course be happy to help you.

I offer coaching and mentoring to you – for you to make the changes you want to in your life. To help you to have more fun, more freedom and less stress. That is it. There is no catch. I believe in you.

Maggie Currie

maggieheart

Professional Transformational Coach, Consultant
Founder of MAGGIE CURRIE COACHING

Website:       http://www.maggiecurrie.co.uk

Facebook:    https://www.facebook.com/maggielifecoach/

Email:            hello@maggiecurrie.co.uk

Repressing Your Inner Voice

In many ways, we are taught from the time we are children to give away our power to others. When we were told to kiss and hug relatives or friends of the family when we didn’t want to, for example, we were learning to override our inner sense of knowing and our right to determine for ourselves what we want to do. This repression continued, most likely, in many experiences at school and in situations at work. At this point, we may not even know how to hold on to our power, because giving it away is so automatic and ingrained.

To some degree, giving our energy to other people is simply part of the social contract, and we feel that we have to do it in order to survive. It is possible to exchange energy in a way that preserves our inner integrity and stability. This begins in a small way: by listening to the voice that continues to let us know what we want, no matter how many times we override its messages.
sisters
Other examples of how we give away our power are buying into trends, letting other people always make decisions for us, not voting, and not voicing an opinion when an inappropriate joke is made. But with not giving our power away we must also be aware of the opposite side, which is standing in our power but being aggressive. Being aggressive is a form of fear, and the remedy is to let our inner balance come back into play.

As we build a relationship with our power, and follow it, we begin to see that we don’t always have to do what we’re being asked to do by others, and we don’t have to jump on every trend. All we have to do is have the confidence to listen to our own voice and let it guide us as we make our own decisions in life and remember the necessity for balance.

If anything resonates with you from the above, I will be delighted to hear from you, and of course be happy to help you.

I offer coaching and mentoring to you – for you to make the changes you want to in your life. To help you to have more fun, more freedom and less stress. That is it. There is no catch. I believe in you.

Maggie Currie

maggieheart

Professional Transformational Coach, Consultant
Founder of MAGGIE CURRIE COACHING

Website:       http://www.maggiecurrie.co.uk

Facebook:    https://www.facebook.com/maggielifecoach/

Email:            hello@maggiecurrie.co.uk

Holding Space For Others


We have all been called upon at one time or another to help a loved one through a difficult time. When the help required consists of concrete actions, such as running errands or making phone calls, we know what to do. But sometimes we are called simply to hold space for the person as they go through whatever they need to go through. They may need to express anger or grief; they may need to talk or be silent. They may need us to hold their hand; they may need us to give them time alone. Whatever the case, when we hold space for someone, we offer ourselves up as a container for the overwhelming feelings they may be encountering due to their circumstances.

Dealing with emotional abuse

When we offer ourselves in this way, the more centered and grounded we are, the better. Our steadiness allows our companion to lean into us for support, as our presence provides an environment in which they can be free to move. We can also help by being responsive, allowing them to dictate the flow of action from talking to not talking, from anger to grief, and back again. By being aware and open, we can help them confront their feelings when that feels right, and back off from them when they need a break. Holding space requires humility, conscientiousness, and the ability to step out of the way, to honestly understand that this is not about us.

When we love someone in this way, we provide a space in which they can simply be. Able to feel what they need to feel without worrying about how they are being perceived. We can provide this offering in person, over the phone, or even from a distance, through meditation. However we do it, when we hold space for someone in need, we are offering a gift of the highest nature.

New for 2013. From confusion to clarity – Becoming ME again

If anything resonates with you from the above, I will be delighted to hear from you, and of course happy to help you.

I offer coaching and mentoring to you – for you to make changes if you want to in your life. To help you to have more fun, more freedom and less stress. That is it. There is no catch. I believe in you.

Maggie Currie

maggieheart
Professional Transformational Coach, Consultant
Founder of MAGGIE CURRIE COACHING

Website:       http://www.maggiecurrie.co.uk

Facebook:    https://www.facebook.com/maggielifecoach/

Email:            hello@maggiecurrie.co.uk