Coming out of a haze

When we feel muddled and unfocused, unsure of which way to turn, we say we are in a fog or a haze. Similar to when we are in a fog in nature, we may feel like we can’t see where we’re going or where we’ve come from, and we’re afraid if we move too quickly we might run into something hidden in the mists that seem to surround us.

Being in a haze necessarily slows us down by limiting our visibility. The best choice may be to pull over and wait for the murkiness to clear. If we move at all, we must go slowly, feeling our way and keeping our eyes open for shapes emerging from the haze, perhaps relying on the taillights of someone in front of us as we make our way along the road.
magnifying-glass
By and large, most of us prefer to be able to see where we are going and move steadfastly in that direction, but there are gifts that come from being in a fog. Sometimes it takes an obstacle like fog to get us to stop and be still in the moment, doing nothing. In this moment of involuntary inactivity, we may look within and find that the source of our fogginess is inside us; it could be some emotional issue that needs tending before we can safely go full steam ahead.

Being in a haze reminds us that when we cannot see outside ourselves, we can always make progress by looking within. Then again, the fog may simply be teaching us important lessons about how to continue moving forward with extreme caution, harnessing our attention, watching closely for new information, and being ready to stop on a sixpence.
winding path
We cannot predict when a haze will come, nor can we know for certain when it will lift, but we can centre ourselves in the haze and wait for guidance. We may find it inside ourselves or in a pair of barely visible taillights just ahead. Whether we follow the lights out of the fog, wait for a gentle breeze to lift it, or allow the sun to burn it away, we can rest certain that one way or another, we will move forward with clarity once again.  Our innate thinking will lead us in the right direction.

If anything resonates with you from the above, I will be delighted to hear from you, and of course be happy to help you.

I offer coaching and mentoring to you – for you to make the changes you want to in your life. To help you to have more fun, more freedom and less stress. That is it. There is no catch. I believe in you.

Maggie Currie

maggieheart

Professional Transformational Coach, Consultant
Founder of MAGGIE CURRIE COACHING

Website:       http://www.maggiecurrie.co.uk

Facebook:    https://www.facebook.com/maggielifecoach/

Email:            hello@maggiecurrie.co.uk

 

Your True Inner Voice

Within each of us, there are numerous voices often that compete for our attention. It can be difficult to decide which one to listen to, particularly when their messages are all quite different, sometimes conflicting, and even alluring. One voice, however, is the speaker of truth.

Among all your inner voices, your true inner voice is the one which encourages you, gives you hope, and pushes you to trust and believe in yourself. It is your innate thinking or your intuition.

Conflict within oneself is often caused by dueling voices inside of each one of us. As we move through life, we get mixed messages from the various aspects of ourselves. Some of our voices, such as the naysayer or saboteur, can speak so loudly that they drown out the voice of truth.

Listening to your true inner voice – often the voice of understanding, support, and self-assurance – it will help lessen and even resolve internal conflict.

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If you’re looking toward the future but your faith in your ability to succeed in life is wavering, you will benefit from finding and listening to your true inner voice. You can connect with it by remaining relaxed and alert, while listening carefully. If you have trouble distinguishing your true voice from the others, meditation may be helpful. You may hear many voices as you meditate, but the one you should pay attention to is the one that speaks to you with love, understanding, and compassion. It will boost your spirits and urge you to go after your dreams. And it won’t cause confusion, remind you of past mistakes, or cause you to doubt yourself.

Remember that if your inner voices are telling you to worry about the past, ignore them since the past is over and done with and cannot be changed.

If your inner voices are telling you to worry about what might happen in the future, ignore them since we don’t know what is going to happen, so it is being made up by that inner voice.  Only listen to your intuition – your true inner voice.

thoughts

The more you listen to and believe in what your true inner voice is telling you about your value and your potential, the stronger that voice will become. And the more you will ignore the voices that can interfere with your resolve to succeed,  those voices will become quieter. Saying no to the voices that are judgmental and make you feel ashamed will help you stop being critical of your failures and afraid of success.

By finding and strengthening your true inner voice, you will be able to ignore internal conflict and pick out the one that speaks the truth.

If anything resonates with you from the above, I will be delighted to hear from you, and of course be happy to help you.

I offer coaching and mentoring to you – for you to make changes if you want to in your life. To help you to have more fun, more freedom and less stress. That is it. There is no catch. I believe in you.

Maggie Currie

maggieheart
Professional Transformational Coach, Consultant
Founder of MAGGIE CURRIE COACHING

Website:       http://www.maggiecurrie.co.uk

Facebook:    https://www.facebook.com/maggielifecoach/

Email:            hello@maggiecurrie.co.uk

 

 

 

Holding Space For Others


We have all been called upon at one time or another to help a loved one through a difficult time. When the help required consists of concrete actions, such as running errands or making phone calls, we know what to do. But sometimes we are called simply to hold space for the person as they go through whatever they need to go through. They may need to express anger or grief; they may need to talk or be silent. They may need us to hold their hand; they may need us to give them time alone. Whatever the case, when we hold space for someone, we offer ourselves up as a container for the overwhelming feelings they may be encountering due to their circumstances.

Dealing with emotional abuse

When we offer ourselves in this way, the more centered and grounded we are, the better. Our steadiness allows our companion to lean into us for support, as our presence provides an environment in which they can be free to move. We can also help by being responsive, allowing them to dictate the flow of action from talking to not talking, from anger to grief, and back again. By being aware and open, we can help them confront their feelings when that feels right, and back off from them when they need a break. Holding space requires humility, conscientiousness, and the ability to step out of the way, to honestly understand that this is not about us.

When we love someone in this way, we provide a space in which they can simply be. Able to feel what they need to feel without worrying about how they are being perceived. We can provide this offering in person, over the phone, or even from a distance, through meditation. However we do it, when we hold space for someone in need, we are offering a gift of the highest nature.

New for 2013. From confusion to clarity – Becoming ME again

If anything resonates with you from the above, I will be delighted to hear from you, and of course happy to help you.

I offer coaching and mentoring to you – for you to make changes if you want to in your life. To help you to have more fun, more freedom and less stress. That is it. There is no catch. I believe in you.

Maggie Currie

maggieheart
Professional Transformational Coach, Consultant
Founder of MAGGIE CURRIE COACHING

Website:       http://www.maggiecurrie.co.uk

Facebook:    https://www.facebook.com/maggielifecoach/

Email:            hello@maggiecurrie.co.uk

 

The Best We Can Be – honouring our children

Everything we do and say in the presence of our children makes an impression on them. We may think we can get away with swearing or gossiping in front of them when they can’t talk, but we have forgotten that just because they can’t talk doesn’t mean they don’t hear. They are sensitive sponges absorbing their environment in ways we will never know. Even if the words don’t make sense to them, they make an impression, as does the energy behind the words. We honour our children when we acknowledge that they are fully present from the very beginning and when we offer ourselves to them in ways that model the best of what humans can be.

sisters

When we bring a child into the world, a great welling up of love and hope fills our hearts. We unequivocally want the very best for our children, and we want to be the best parents a child could ever want. We begin to see ourselves and our lives in a different light, and things that seemed okay before we had a child suddenly reveal themselves as problematical. This can lead to a somewhat mincing review of our habits of speech, thought and feeling, our relationships, and our physical habits. We may feel that we have put ourselves under a microscope, which can be stressful. However, it can also lead to a great healing of our own unresolved issues and, in turn, it enables us to be good parents to our children. Talking to other conscious parents about this life transformation can be very helpful.

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Our desire to become the best we can be is often strongest at the very beginning of a child’s life and sometimes loses its intensity as we grow accustomed to their presence. However, it is never too late to look at ourselves and notice whether we are offering our best to our children. That original welling up of love and hope can inspire us throughout our lives to be the best we can be.

If anything resonates with you from the above, I will be delighted to hear from you, and of course happy to help you.

I offer coaching and mentoring to you – for you to make changes if you want to in your life. To help you to have more fun, more freedom and less stress. That is it. There is no catch. I believe in you.

Maggie Currie

maggieheart
Professional Transformational Coach, Consultant
Founder of MAGGIE CURRIE COACHING

Website:       http://www.maggiecurrie.co.uk

Facebook:    https://www.facebook.com/maggielifecoach/

Email:            hello@maggiecurrie.co.uk

 

You are stronger than you realise

Our capacity to cope successfully with life’s challenges far outstrips our capacity to feel nervousness.  Yet in the weeks, days and hours leading up to an event that we believe will test our limits, we become nervous.  While we have previously regarded ourselves as equal to the trials that lie ahead, we reach a point at which they near and our anxiety begins to mount. We then become increasingly worked up, until the moment of truth arrives and we discover that our worry was all for nothing.  We are almost always stronger and more capable that we believe ourselves to be.  But anxiety is not rational in nature, which means that in most cases we cannot work through it using logic as our only tool.  Reason can help us recognise the relative futility of unwarranted worry but, more often than not, we will find more comfort in patterns of thought and activity that re-direct our attention to practical or engaging matters.

 

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Most of us find it remarkably difficult to focus on two distinct thoughts or emotions at once, and we can use this natural human limitation to our advantage when trying to stay centred in the time leading up to a potentially tricky experience.  When we concentrate on something unrelated to our worry – such as deep breathing, visualisations, pleasurable pursuits or exercise – anxiety dissipates naturally.  Meditation is also a useful coping mechanism as it provides us with a means to ground ourselves in the moment.

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The intense emotional flare up you experience just before you are set to challenge yourself is often a mixture of both excitement and fear.  When you take steps to eliminate the fear, you can more fully enjoy the moment.  Though you may find it difficult to avoid getting worked up, your awareness of the forces acting on your feelings will help you return to your centre and accept that few hurdles you will face will be as high as they at first appear.

If anything resonates with you from the above, I will be delighted to hear from you, and of course happy to help you, please contact me .

What I offer is coaching and mentoring to you – for you to make changes if you want to in your life. To help you to have more fun, more freedom and less stress. That is it. There is no catch. I believe in you.

Maggie Currie

maggieheart
Professional Transformational Coach, Consultant
Founder of MAGGIE CURRIE COACHING

Website:       http://www.maggiecurrie.co.uk

Facebook:    https://www.facebook.com/maggielifecoach/

Email:            hello@maggiecurrie.co.uk

Are you enjoying the most important relationship in your life?

The most important relationship you have in your life is with yourself.  Even though you are the only one who is present at every moment of your life – from the moment of conception onward – this relationship can often be the most difficult one to cultivate.  This is possibly because society places so much emphasis on the importance of being in a romantic partnership, even instilling in us the belief that you should set aside your own needs for the those of others.  But, until you know yourself, you cannot possibly choose the right relationship to support your mutual growth toward your highest potential.  By allowing yourself to be comfortable with being alone, you can become the person with whom you want to have a relationship.

Dealing with emotional abuse

It would appear that at no other time in history has it been possible for people to survive, and even thrive, whilst living alone.  We have the freedom to support ourselves financially, socially and emotionally without depending on a spouse for survival in any of these areas.  With this freedom comes the opportunity to pursue our own interests and create fulfilling partnerships with friends, business partners and neighbours.  Once we’ve satisfied our needs and created our support system, a partner then becomes someone with whom we can share the bounty of all we’ve created as well as the beauty we’ve discovered within ourselves.

It may be that we need to learn to create spaces to be alone within our relationships. But if we can shift our expectations of our relationships with ourselves and others to opportunities for discovery, we then open ourselves up to forge new paths and discover uncharted territory. Being willing to know and love ourselves, and to find what truly makes us feel deeply and strongly, gives us the advantage of being able to attract and choose the right people with whom to share ourselves. Choosing to enjoy being alone allows us to explore more fully our most important relationship—the one with our true selves.

If anything resonates with you from the above, I will be delighted to hear from you, and of course happy to help you, please contact me .

I am helping people to become the very best version of themselves and would love to work with you too.

Maggie Currie

maggieheart
Professional Transformational Coach, Consultant
Founder of MAGGIE CURRIE COACHING

Website:       http://www.maggiecurrie.co.uk

Facebook:    https://www.facebook.com/maggielifecoach/

Email:            hello@maggiecurrie.co.uk

Bouncing back

Life happens.  It doesn’t matter how positive you are or how balanced and centred you are, there are going to be times when you are knocked sideways. Times when your carefully organized life is turned upside down and you get knocked for six.  Life happens!

You may be challenged with any number of situations that will leave you feeling like you were kicked in the stomach.  It may be the loss of a loved one, a divorce, the loss of a job.

Let’s face it. Things happen. They’re part of life and no matter how you try to explain them away with the idea that “everything happens for a reason,” they hurt. And they hurt a lot!

They hurt at the very core of your being. The pain begins in your heart and radiates throughout your entire being. Repeating positive phrases does not make it stop hurting.

emotionalwoman

At times like these you’re probably going to feel down, maybe depressed. You will probably feel anger or some other manifestation of your pain. Whatever you’re feeling, it’s ok. It’s ok to feel hurt, sad, angry or whatever your true feelings are. You cannot deny pain any more than you can deny fear. The only way through this is to give yourself permission to feel the feeling.

The question is not whether or not you will feel down. The question is for how long will you stay in this state?

The difference between people who get through life’s challenging moments, regardless of the seriousness, and those who are immobilized by the events is their ability to bounce back.

How quickly can you bounce back?  Of course, the severity of the event will have a lot to do with the time it will take you to get past the pain and on with your life.

Take the example of two people being downsized from their job, something that is becoming a natural occurrence these days.  One is floored by the news of his dismissal.  He expresses his pain by becoming angry at his employers, his colleagues and the system in general.  He spends his days telling anyone who’ll listen, about his “problem.”

Usually from a barstool!

As he sees it, his life is ruined and he’s blaming everyone for his troubles.  People who react like this spend weeks, even months or years, wallowing in despair until, if they’re fortunate, someone close to them convinces them to seek professional help.

screaming

On the other hand, the other person reacts very differently.  Although they have gone through the same experience, and have pretty much the same issues like living expenses, etc., they choose to react differently.

After a brief period of feeling a loss of self-esteem, self-pity and anger, they decide to get back in the game. They begin contacting their network of colleagues, avail themselves of the courses and other services their former employer offered everyone and starts actively looking for a new position.  In a short time they find their “dream job” with an exciting new company.

While both people in our hypothetical example had the same experience and both went through a period of hurting, the time each allowed themselves to remain in that dis-empowering state was vastly different.  While one remained “stuck” in their problem, the other handled their loss and moved on with their life.

This is the key. It’s not whether life occasionally puts you into a tailspin, it’s how long you choose to remain there.

dosomethingtoday

When something devastating happens to you, allow yourself some time to grieve your loss.  However, don’t allow yourself to get stuck there. Take some action. Join a support group, talk about your feelings with a trusted friend or your spiritual advisor.  If necessary, seek professional help.

In the case of a job loss, perhaps you might want to take some time to re-evaluate your career goals. You may even consider a change in career altogether. When you’re ready, you can begin networking and making new contacts.  Attend social or networking events. Call people you know. Do something!

One of the most important things to remember in high stress situations is not to allow yourself to become isolated. While spending some time alone is normal, even necessary, isolation can be dangerous and should be avoided at all costs. Get out and be with people as soon as possible.

As a friend recently reminded me, “life is for the living.” It’s important to get back to your life. In time, the pain will pass.

If anything resonates with you from the above, I will be delighted to hear from you, and of course happy to help you, please contact me .

I am helping people to become the very best version of themselves and would love to work with you too.

Maggie Currie

maggieheart
Professional Transformational Coach, Consultant
Founder of MAGGIE CURRIE COACHING

Website:       http://www.maggiecurrie.co.uk

Facebook:    https://www.facebook.com/maggielifecoach/

Email:            hello@maggiecurrie.co.uk