Are all ‘conferences’ the same?

I remember going to my very first ‘conference’.  It was marketed as a Coach’s super conference where I would learn from a plethera of ‘world famous’ coaches and come away with lots of useful information.  I would learn a whole host of stuff. The cost was minimal for the actual conference, something in the region of £70 for a weekend, as the organiser was doing it to be philanthropic.  It was being held near an international airport in an hotel.  I decided I would go and booked my hotel room, and set off to learn something new.

I was sorely disappointed.  The very first presenter was Paul McKenna.  He spoke for two hours, gave everyone a free copy of his latest book.  He was extremely interesting and didn’t sell a thing.

After this the ‘conference’ went downhill rapidly.  Every speaker that followed on that first day was selling their product.  Whether it was a coaching course, a weekend of inspiration culminating in a fire walk, how to be a tv star etc.  Not only that, there was the pressing of the urgency buttons because the audience were invited to run to the back of the room to sign up now as there were only 9, 8, 7, 6 places left and so on.

emotionalwoman

And these products were priced in the hundreds or thousands of pounds.  Plus, if you signed up today, you could get the whole ‘conference’ on video to keep forever for only £xxxx.

I did meet some lovely people in the audience, some of whom were as disappointed as I was.

I stayed the night in the hotel, which was lovely by the way.  After breakfast the ‘conference’ continued.  By the first coffee break in the morning I had had enough.  I couldn’t take any more blatant selling.  So I left.  I went home. I vowed never to go to one of these ‘conferences’ ever again.  I did learn something at that ‘conference’, not to go to another one and not to do the same thing myself.

Of course, there are many ways these selling shows are created. They are billed as one day workshops, or weekend retreats. The main aim of these is to upsell, even though you do learn something about yourself whilst you are there.

iStock_000008538351Large (2)

And, of course, once you have bought into the upsell, and you have moved on to whatever course, product it is, there is always another, more expensive course or product to buy.

So, are all ‘conferences’ the same.  No, there are genuine conferences where you learn stuff that is useful to you and where you are not asked to buy something else much more expensive. But do beware, as I learned the hard way, that not all conferences are what they are advertised to be.  And, if it looks too good to be true, that is probably right, it is too good to be true.

If this resonates with you, and you have had a similar experience,  get in touch with me today and tell me about it. I will be really interested to hear about your experiences.

Maggie Currie

maggieheart
Transformational Coach, Consultant
Founder of MAGGIE CURRIE COACHING

Website:       http://www.maggiecurrie.co.uk

Facebook:    https://www.facebook.com/maggielifecoach/

Email:            hello@maggiecurrie.co.uk

 

Do you always need to defend yourself?

Living with people who are verbally abusive or verbally aggressive can be very demanding on your time and energy.  But does it have to be that way?

The abusive or aggressive person often wants you to defend yourself or explain yourself.  This is abusive behaviour, controlling, demeaning and only you can decide if you are willing to tolerate it.  Some people have tolerated this behaviour for many decades, probably because they are scared of what other people might say or think, scared about what would happen if they stood up to the bully, and even scared of what life would be like if they were to leave and begin a new life for themselves.

There is a lovely quote from Sophia Dembling “If you can plant yourself on solid ground in your head and heart, other people won’t be able to throw you off balance.  No need to debate or justify your stance.  Explain yourself if you want, bu you needn’t defend yourself.”

tiredwoman

The bully is usually sweetness and light when anyone else is around, but when there is nobody else there they can be constantly verbally abusive and aggressive.  This is typical behaviour from a bully who, if confronted, will usually back down because they are usually cowards too.  They want control of you and this is the only way they know how.  And because they have got away with it for years, and because you think you can’t do anything about it, they will continue in the same way.

So, what can you do about this verbally abusive and aggressive person?  You have several options available to you.  You can put up with it, you can ignore it (not so easy I know), you can try and persuade the bully to go to counselling with you or you can decide you are not going to tolerate it any longer and leave the relationship.

The excuses will roll around your head one after the other – They won’t be able to cope without me, what will I do on my own, what if…………?

Dealing with emotional abuse

But you have to decide what is best for you, and only you.  It is your life and you deserve to be able to live it in your way without the constant abuse and aggressiveness.  The abuser has chosen their path and they are happy to be on it as they are in control of you and they know exactly what they are doing to make you unhappy and make you believe that if you were to leave them that this would happen or that would happen, and they will come out with a large range of scenarios.  All of these scenarios will sound plausible, because that is what they are good at.  Making you feel inadequate.

So it is up to you to decide what you want to do.  Do you want to stay and be constantly verbally abused and spoken to aggressively?  If not, seek some professional help so you can make an informed decision about your life.

Are you ready to make changes? Work with me and learn to live life from the inside out gain more freedom, more fun and less stress.

You will discover how your mind only works one way – from the inside out.  Your life will be more productive, enjoyable and fulfilling.

Here is a lovely testimonial from one of my clients: ‘Maggie intuitively knew that the path I was on wasn’t the way I truly wanted to go. She allowed me to see that my passions were elsewhere and opened my mind to the possibilities ahead of me. I changed my path and have never looked back. Maggie was totally right.’ – MV, UK

So get in touch with me today.

Maggie Currie

maggieheart
Transformational Coach, Consultant
Founder of MAGGIE CURRIE COACHING

Website:       http://www.maggiecurrie.co.uk

Facebook:    https://www.facebook.com/maggielifecoach/

Email:            hello@maggiecurrie.co.uk

 

 

 

Getting rid of stuff can be good

I was looking through my folder of coaching stuff that I have collected over the years.  It was all contained in a folder that had 50 clear A4 sized pockets, and it was crammed with information.

There was information about NLP, about the ‘right’ questions to ask a client, about how to frame questions and so much more. Although I qualified as an NLP Practitioner, I don’t use NLP as it never feels right to me.  That is my personal opinion and not a judgement on the subject.

Looking through my folder I began to think about when I had last looked at the information contained in it.  I came to the conclusion that it must have been about five years ago, and then I remembered that when I had looked through the folder before a coaching session with one of my clients, I had closed it again because nothing had jumped out at me that was useful to me or the client.

flat world

It came to me that I had been indulging myself in flat earth thinking.  In the distant past people thought the earth was flat. They designed huge anchors for the ships so they wouldn’t fall off the edge.  They didn’t sail too far away from land in case they fell off the edge. They built tall lookout posts on top of the masts so someone could make sure they didn’t reach the edge of the earth and fall off.  It is said that Christopher Columbus nearly had a mutiny on board his ship as he refused to stop sailing further and further away from land, and his crew thought they would all fall off the end of the earth. He didn’t of course.

I had been guilty of flat earth thinking. I thought I needed all the bumph and information I had collected over the past decade to be a good coach.  I thought if I got rid of it then I would lose all my abilities. Of course, I don’t need it all.  I have all I need within myself. I am enough. I love the work I do and my clients get great results.  So why hang on to it all? No reason at all.

It is all gone. Every bit of it.

iStock_000005988115Medium (2)

So I am back in the driving seat of my life.  And if you would like to get back in the driving seat of your life, get clarity about your current situation, about what really matters in life, the choices you want to make and who you really are. Get in touch with me and we can get a date in the diary for an initial chat.

This is what one of my clients commented after working with me a few years ago:

“The ride has been awesome…the support you gave me while I was driving at the wheel of my life and you were sitting in the passenger seat guiding, encouraging, and supporting me was fantastic and I so appreciate that.” – SR, USA

Are you ready to make changes? Working with me and learning to live life from the inside out will bring you more freedom, more fun and less stress.

You will discover how your mind only works one way – from the inside out.  Your life will be more productive, enjoyable and fulfilling.

So get in touch with me today.

Maggie Currie

maggieheart
Transformational Coach, Consultant
Founder of MAGGIE CURRIE COACHING

Website:       http://www.maggiecurrie.co.uk

Facebook:    https://www.facebook.com/maggielifecoach/

Email:            hello@maggiecurrie.co.uk