There Is Only Now

It is easy for us to walk through our lives without really being present. While dwelling on the past and living for the future are entertaining, it is physically impossible to live anywhere but in the present moment. We cannot step out of our front door and take a right turn to April of last year, any more than we can take a left turn to New Year’s eve in the future.  We can, however, easily miss the future we are waiting for as it becomes the now we are too busy to pay attention to.  We will spend the rest of our time playing “catch up” to the moment that we just let pass by. During moments like these, it is important to remember that there is only Now.

turned on enjoy today neon signage

Photo by Ikhsan Sugiarto on Pexels.com

So you can feel more at home in the present moment, it is essential to try to stay aware, open and receptive. Being in the present moment requires our full attention so that we are fully awake to experience it. When we are fully present, our minds do not wander. We are focused on what is going on right now, rather than thinking about what just happened or worrying about what is going to happen next. Being present lets us experience each moment in our lives in a way that cannot be fully lived through memory or fantasy.

When we begin to focus our attention into the present moment, it can be almost overwhelming to be here. There is a state of stillness that has to happen that may take some getting used to, and the mind chatter that so often gets us into our heads and out of the present moment doesn’t have as much to do. We may feel a lack of control because we aren’t busy planning our next move, assessing our current situation, or anticipating the future. Instead, being present requires that we be flexible, creative, attentive, and spontaneous. Each present moment is completely new, and nothing like it has happened or will ever happen again. As you move through your day, remember to stay present in each moment. In doing so, you will live your life without having to wait for the future or yearn for the past. Life happens to us when we happen to life in the Now.

If anything resonates with you in this article, I will be delighted to hear from you, and of course be happy to help you.

I offer coaching and mentoring to you – for you to make the changes you want to in your life. Build your confidence in your abilities.  Read my clients’ testimonials here. To help you to have more fun, more freedom and less stress. That is it. There is no catch. I believe in you.

Maggie Currie

maggieheart

Professional Transformational Coach, Consultant
Founder of MAGGIE CURRIE COACHING

Website:       http://www.maggiecurrie.co.uk

Facebook:    https://www.facebook.com/maggielifecoach/

Email:            hello@maggiecurrie.co.uk

Shake those tail feathers

Most of us express our individuality in many ways throughout our lives. Although, as we proudly share our offbeat traits and preferences with the world, we take great trouble to downplay those eccentricities we ourselves deem odd. Instead of living lives coloured by these quirky impulses, we seek out socially acceptable outlets for our peculiarities. We may not realise that we are editing ourselves in this way because our individual societal awareness is unintentionally tuned in to the attitudes of the people we encounter each day. Over time, we have learned to suppress some of the most fun aspects of individuality. To rediscover and embrace these buried traits, we need only ask ourselves what we would do if we knew for certain that no one would judge our choices.

wild turkey

Photo by ASHISH SHARMA on Pexels.com

Visualising this day without judgment can help you to understand the idiosyncrasies that are an important part of who you are but seldom manifest themselves in your existence. Perhaps you secretly dream of replacing grown-up, conservative clothing in favour of a changing array of outfits. You may envision yourself painting your car electric-green, hugging the trees in a crowded local park, singing joyous songs as you skip through your community, or taking up an exciting hobby like fire spinning. Try not to be surprised, however, if your imagination takes you in unexpectedly simple directions. In your musings, you may see yourself doing things such as breaking out in dance or dying your hair a fun colour. Regardless of the nature of your suppressed peculiarities, ask yourself what is really stopping you from making them a part of your life, and then resolve to incorporate at least one into your everyday existence.

Life as we know it is so short. Making the most of years we are granted is a matter of being ourselves even though we know that we will inevitably meet people who disapprove of our choices. When you shake your tail feathers like no one is watching, you will discover that there are many others who appreciate you because you are willing to let go of some inhibitions. By doing this you help others know it is okay. No one else in the world is precisely like you and, each time you revel in this simple fact, you rededicate yourself to the celebration of your individuality.

If anything resonates with you in this article, I will be delighted to hear from you, and of course be happy to help you.

I offer coaching and mentoring to you – for you to make the changes you want to in your life. Build your confidence in your abilities.  Read my clients’ testimonials here. To help you to have more fun, more freedom and less stress. That is it. There is no catch. I believe in you.

Maggie Currie

maggieheart

Professional Transformational Coach, Consultant
Founder of MAGGIE CURRIE COACHING

Website:       http://www.maggiecurrie.co.uk

Facebook:    https://www.facebook.com/maggielifecoach/

Email:            hello@maggiecurrie.co.uk

Tree House

There is no greater way to escape the troubles of daily life than to climb up into the welcoming space of a tree house. Like a bird in its nest, we feel held and safe in the branches, hidden within a curtain of green leaves. Here we can breathe more freely and think more clearly, our hearts and brains fed by the oxygen released by the leaves. We appear to float above the everyday world of the ground, we have a bird’s-eye view of all that remains below.

girl climbing ladder

Photo by Kaboompics .com on Pexels.com

We may choose to be alone or we may invite a special friend to join us. Whichever we choose, this is our private world in which we get to decide who comes and goes. It is our haven where we can fully be who we are, and reveal our most hidden secrets, dreams, and desires. It is also an ideal vantage point on the life that continues below the branches. Often, a new view of a situation is just what we need to answer a difficult question, solve a challenging problem, or see something we’ve haven’t noticed before. It is as if we have climbed up into the heavens and are able to tap into a higher awareness. We can draw on this airy energy to revitalise us, relax us, and feed us new ideas. When we climb down, we are ready to enter the world again, cleaner, clearer, and often more inspired.

If you haven’t been in a tree house for a while, now may be the time to make one for yourself or find someone else’s and ask if you can borrow it for a short while. If you can’t find or create an actual tree house, see if you can find a rooftop garden, or a quiet spot in a grove of trees on a hilltop, or perhaps a light-filled attic. Or just close your eyes and create a virtual tree house  in the branches of your favourite tree.

If anything resonates with you in this article, I will be delighted to hear from you, and of course be happy to help you.

I offer coaching and mentoring to you – for you to make the changes you want to in your life. Build your confidence in your abilities.  Read my clients’ testimonials here. To help you to have more fun, more freedom and less stress. That is it. There is no catch. I believe in you.

Maggie Currie

maggieheart

Professional Transformational Coach, Consultant
Founder of MAGGIE CURRIE COACHING

Website:       http://www.maggiecurrie.co.uk

Facebook:    https://www.facebook.com/maggielifecoach/

Email:            hello@maggiecurrie.co.uk

Our Community Responsibility

It’s easy to get caught up in our personal lives and forget that we have an obligation to be responsible members of our communities. For some of us, expressing this responsibility is so interwoven into our personal lives that it is simply a natural extension of who we are. Others may need to take a moment to consider how to be more responsible for the community in which they live.  For those of you who live in large cities, you can start with our own vicinity. Anything you do on a small level will automatically ripple out into the larger system.

Business people communicating with each other against white
Communities thrive on the talents of their members, so one approach to community responsibility is to consider what you have to offer and find ways to bring that into your community. If you have a special gift when it comes to bringing people together, you might agree to host a party or event once a year that includes the whole community. Even a small open house in a small venue can accomplish a lot in terms of making people feel more connected and comfortable with each other. If you have a talent for organic gardening, you might offer to help people in your area plan their own organic gardens. You might be the go to person for neighbours who need someone to water their plants or care for their pets when they’re away. You might take an abandoned space in your community and galvanise others to help you transform it into a community garden or a playground for children. In an area where there are many homeless people, starting a soup kitchen or organising a Christmas meal makes a big difference not only to those in need but to those who want to help.

All fun days, picnics, and ceremonies started somewhere, with someone who wanted to give back to the community in which they lived. It’s not too late to propose and execute a new tradition in your own community, whether it’s a street party or an annual picnic. Your particular vision, gifts, and strengths are part of what makes your community unique, so as you recognise them in yourself, feel free to offer them to those who live in your vicinity. Whether your offerings are visionary or practical, they are the very essence of community.

If anything resonates with you in this article, I will be delighted to hear from you, and of course be happy to help you.

I offer coaching and mentoring to you – for you to make the changes you want to in your life. Build your confidence in your abilities.  Read my clients’ testimonials here. To help you to have more fun, more freedom and less stress. That is it. There is no catch. I believe in you.

Maggie Currie

maggieheart

Professional Transformational Coach, Consultant
Founder of MAGGIE CURRIE COACHING

Website:       http://www.maggiecurrie.co.uk

Facebook:    https://www.facebook.com/maggielifecoach/

Email:            hello@maggiecurrie.co.uk

Grumps

When we’re in a good mood, we shine like the sun. But if we find ourselves in the presence of a person, or people, in a grumpy mood, it can feel like a dark cloud is trying to block our radiance and block our positive way of seeing the world. We can remind ourselves that clouds pass, while the sun and stars continue to shine above. Then it’s easier to think of these “grumps” affectionately, knowing that they only have the power to affect our mood if we allow them to. With the power of change firmly in our hands, we use our innate thinking, we can choose how to respond to a grumpy person, or a grumbling group of people, with confidence and understanding.

Like a lighthouse, we can continue to shine through the darkness, offering our light to help others find their way back to their own. We can send them a silent message of peace or a sympathetic smile. We may sense that reaching out to offer a comforting touch or hug can ease their frustrations and cause the clouds to dissipate. If they need understanding, we can sympathise without reinforcing the negativity they may be experiencing by directing their attention someplace more positive. Helping them find the humour in their situation might be appropriate and is a great way to lift spirits, or a logical approach may help them see all the good in the situation, in their lives and in the world.

20 ways to increase your confidence after divorce

We might find that someone we meet often seems to be in a perpetual state of gloom. Our tendency in such cases may be to try to avoid them, but instead we can make the choice to offer support that comes from the heart. We may be inspired to ask if they would like some help or to offer suggestions that have helped us in the past. We can include them in our thoughts. When we lend our energy to uplift another in any way, we improve our own lives while making the world a better place for all of us.

If anything resonates with you in this article, I will be delighted to hear from you, and of course be happy to help you.

I offer coaching and mentoring to you – for you to make the changes you want to in your life. To help you to have more fun, more freedom and less stress. That is it. There is no catch. I believe in you.

Maggie Currie

maggieheart

Professional Transformational Coach, Consultant
Founder of MAGGIE CURRIE COACHING

Website:       http://www.maggiecurrie.co.uk

Facebook:    https://www.facebook.com/maggielifecoach/

Email:            hello@maggiecurrie.co.uk

The Essence of You

Journey to the real you:

Part 1:

Do you remember when were you happy, free, creative, fun, vulnerable, secure?

We are looking for the essence of who you are at the core of your being.

Find some photos of you when you were a child, maybe 5 or 6 years old. If you can’t find any, then try and find some of you as a teenager or at least younger than you are now.

Really look at the younger you in the photos. Answer these questions as well as you can.

  • What do you remember about the way you were?
  • If you were the parent of this child, what would you give them?
  • How would you encourage them in their lives?
  • What do you think they deserve in this life?
  • How would you want their life to be?
  • How should they be treated emotionally?
  • How could you protect/nurture her?
  • What do they need in their life right now?
  • What qualities did they have then that they might have forgotten?
  • What changes do you feel this person would like to make in their lives right now?

Beware of thinking the pathetic thought that ‘There is nothing good about me.  I can’t fill this in’.  If you continue with this type of thought pattern you will always stay trapped.  Please try to work really hard here…. even if you can only come up with one or two of these statements, at least it’s a start.  Remember to look at your photo as you do this. Listen to your innate thinking, sit quietly and listen to what you hear.

sisters

Part 2:

Look at your photo as you complete this exercise, write your answers to the statements below.

This might be tough for you so please be gentle with yourself.  You might feel like giving up at this point, or skipping this exercise, or skim-reading it through.  Don’t!  If you work really hard you will begin to feel some positive benefits.

This is where we can now begin to create some positive dialogue which will anchor you and make you feel strong again.

  • I deserve to be happy because ………
  • I like me because ……….
  • I am a valuable human being because ………
  • I am a beautiful human being because ……….
  • I have value because ………
  • I have worth because ………
  • I am worth loving because ………
  • I deserve to have fun in life because ………
  • I am important because ………
  • I am loveable because ……….
  • I am unique because ……….
  • I am perfect as I am because ………

 

Once you have completed the last exercise as best you possibly can, read your answers and remind yourself daily of why you are so special.

You can do this exercise again in a few months and notice any changes.

If you need help with any of the above, I will be delighted to hear from you, please contact me .

I am helping people to become the very best version of themselves and would love to work with you too.

Maggie Currie

maggieheart
Professional Transformational Coach, Consultant
Founder of MAGGIE CURRIE COACHING

Website:       http://www.maggiecurrie.co.uk

Facebook:    https://www.facebook.com/maggielifecoach/

Email:            hello@maggiecurrie.co.uk

 

 

Cause and Effect

How do you live your life?  Do you live it at cause – or do you live it at effect?  And what does that mean for you?

Take two people going for interviews for a job, both have all the right credentials and experience for the role.  One of them approaches their interview from the perspective that it’s completely down to their performance as to whether they get the job or not.  They will choose how to present and project themselves and they will take 100% responsibility for their result.  They feel pretty confident and in control.

The other person is approaching their interview differently – from the perspective that they’ll do the best they can, but ultimately it’s down to the interviewer’s opinion of them and the other candidates’ performance against theirs.  They feel they have little control over the outcome, which makes them pretty nervous, and they believe that interview situations never bring out the best in them, so why should this one be any different?

Which one is more likely to be successful?  In my experience that would be the first person.  A clear example of being ‘at cause’.

iStock_000009116473XSmall

We know that a cause is something that makes something else happen.  So when we’re talking about living at cause, it’s all about causing things to happen, making choices, taking action and full responsibility.  Notice the position of power this puts you in  .

On the other side of the equation, an effect is what happens because of the cause.  So living on the effect side means having things happen to us, living with excuses and reasons why something couldn’t be, the choice and responsibility is ‘taken’ out of our hands.  It’s a feeling of powerlessness and of being the victim, in many cases.

Think about people you know at each side of the equation.  Firstly those people around you who know that if they want to do something, they will do it.  They make their decision, they choose their approach and they keep going until they achieve what they wanted.  If something isn’t working, they find another way and make it work, taking full responsibility for their goal and whatever happens on the way.  They choose to have their result.

Think about people you know on the effect side.  In situations where they want something, but see themselves at the whim of others as to whether they get it.  Setbacks are almost expected and they allow them to be setbacks.  Everything is down to outside influences, they blame others and feel powerless.  They end up with a bunch of excuses and not their result.

The interesting thing is that people on either side of the equation, whether at cause or effect, will each walk away patting themselves on the back.  Why?  Well, of course, the ‘at cause’ group chose to have their result and they got it.  While for the ‘at effect’ people it was completely out of their hands right from the start.  They found  a reason (excuse?) why they couldn’t have their result and walked away saying “see, I knew it wouldn’t work”.  Either way they were right.

Your life does not resemble anybody else's

So the question to you really should be – not which side do you live at, but which side do you want to live at?  Cause or effect?  The key point here is that at any given moment, you have the choice. You either allow what’s happening to affect you and hold on to your excuses.  Or you take full responsibility for what is going on and choose to get your result.  I know which I choose!

Try this… put yourself back at Cause!

Want to know the one question that can pull you out of that powerless feeling of being ‘at effect’?

How have I chosen to create this right now?

It’s that simple.  In any situation, if you can stop, ask that question of yourself and accept that no matter how much you want to answer it with “well, actually, I didn’t create this”… you did. If you can accept 100% responsibility for what’s going on, you put yourself at cause and you immediately grant yourself the power to change it.

The next chance you get, try this.  I would love to know what result you get.

Maggie Currie

maggieheart
Transformational Coach, Consultant
Founder of MAGGIE CURRIE COACHING

Website:       http://www.maggiecurrie.co.uk

Facebook:    https://www.facebook.com/maggielifecoach/

Email:            hello@maggiecurrie.co.uk