Let It Roll off Our Back

One of the most difficult challenges in life is learning not to take things to heart and hold on to them. When we were younger, or if we are very sensitive, we took so much of what came our way to heart. This can be overwhelming and unproductive if it throws us off balance on a regular basis. When we are feeling criticised or attacked from all directions, it can become very difficult for us to recover ourselves so that we can continue to speak and act our truth. This is when we would do well to remember the old saying about letting certain things roll off us, like water off a duck’s back.

photo of brown and grey duck on body of water

Photo by DSD on Pexels.com

Usually the attacks and criticisms of others have much more to do with them and how they are feeling than with us. If we get caught up in trying to adjust ourselves to other people’s negative energy, we will lose touch with our core. In fact, in a positive light, these slings and arrows offer us the opportunity to strengthen our core sense of self, and to learn to dodge and deflect other people’s misdirected negativity. The more we do this, the more we are able to understand what belongs to us and what belongs to other people. With practice, we will become masters of our energetic integrity, refusing to serve as targets for the disowned anger and frustration of the people around us.

Eventually, we will be able to hear the feedback that others have to offer, taking in anything that might actually be constructive, and releasing that which has nothing to do with us. First, though, we tend ourselves compassionately by recognising when we can’t take something in from the outside without hurting ourselves. This is when we make like a duck, shaking it off and letting it roll off our back as we continue our way in the world.

If anything resonates with you in this article, I will be delighted to hear from you, and of course be happy to help you.

I offer coaching and mentoring to you – for you to make the changes you want to in your life. Build your confidence in your abilities.  Read my clients’ testimonials here. To help you to have more fun, more freedom and less stress. That is it. There is no catch. I believe in you.

Maggie Currie

maggieheart

Professional Transformational Coach, Consultant
Founder of MAGGIE CURRIE COACHING

Website:       http://www.maggiecurrie.co.uk

Facebook:    https://www.facebook.com/maggielifecoach/

Email:            hello@maggiecurrie.co.uk

Go for It

There are times in your life when all the signs seem to be pointing you in a particular direction. Your thoughts and dreams are echoed in the songs we hear, the stories on tv or in the media. Maybe the message you are getting from the universe doesn’t even make sense in the “real” world, but somewhere inside, these urges feel right. Maybe you feel you are being told to move to a new town, although your life where you are seems just fine. Or maybe you feel the desire to pursue a new direction in your career, even though it never really interested you before. When you spend time getting in touch with your higher self, your intuition sends you directives to lead you to become your best and most fulfilled self. And when you are open and listening, the next step is to take action and go for it.

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Photo by JESHOOTS.com on Pexels.com

Once you make the decision to pursue your inner urgings, the universe sets into motion the means for all sorts of details to fall into place. A sense of peace will come over you, because you know that any questions will no longer make you wonder if your dreams are possible, but how to make them happen.  Instead of deterring you from your goal, these questions only serve to clarify your focus to move you forward. You need not throw caution to the wind to follow your dream. The positive shift in your energy affects everything around you. Like a rush of water, it goes ahead to clear debris from your path so that you can go forward. Your new attitude also attracts like minded people. Sometimes even the most unlikely people arrive to help you along your way with the information and support you need.

Wherever your dreams are pointing you today, take a step towards them. Take action and manifest your inner urges and soul whisperings.

If anything resonates with you in this article, I will be delighted to hear from you, and of course be happy to help you.

I offer coaching and mentoring to you – for you to make the changes you want to in your life. Build your confidence in your abilities.  Read my clients’ testimonials here. To help you to have more fun, more freedom and less stress. That is it. There is no catch. I believe in you.

Maggie Currie

maggieheart

Professional Transformational Coach, Consultant
Founder of MAGGIE CURRIE COACHING

Website:       http://www.maggiecurrie.co.uk

Facebook:    https://www.facebook.com/maggielifecoach/

Email:            hello@maggiecurrie.co.uk

Pushing Buttons

We’ve all had our buttons pushed to the point where we feel we really can’t take it any longer, and chances are, we’ve all pushed somebody else’s buttons, with or without knowing it. The button pusher may not be aware of what they’re doing, but in the end the buttons belong to us, and we are the ones who must deal with what comes up. The more we take responsibility for our own feelings and reactions, the less reactive these buttons will be.

man wearing brown suit jacket mocking on white telephone

Photo by Moose Photos on Pexels.com

We’ve all had the experience of having someone snap at us, it would appear from nowhere. This happens when we unconsciously push a button in someone else we didn’t even know was there. This can happen with a complete stranger and sometimes with a person we’ve known very well for years. We ourselves may also have a relationship with someone whose buttons we secretly would like to push. Buttons are just soft spots that have been touched one too many times, and they symbolise some pain that needs to be acknowledged and healed. This may be a wound remembered from childhood, or a recent trauma, that we haven’t adequately tended. Whatever the case, when our buttons get pushed, the person who most needs our attention and caring is us, and blaming the button pusher only distracts us from finding a true resolution to our suffering.

At the same time, if someone continually opens our wounds so that they never have time to heal, we must set a boundary with that person. Compulsive button pushers, who seem to find pleasure or satisfaction in hurting us, are not welcome in our personal space. In the end, knowing where our buttons are enables us to do the work necessary to heal. Freedom comes when we deal with the pain behind the button, thus disconnecting our automatic reaction to being pushed which will in turn stop the button pusher.

If anything resonates with you in this article, I will be delighted to hear from you, and of course be happy to help you.

I offer coaching and mentoring to you – for you to make the changes you want to in your life. Build your confidence in your abilities.  Read my clients’ testimonials here. To help you to have more fun, more freedom and less stress. That is it. There is no catch. I believe in you.

Maggie Currie

maggieheart

Professional Transformational Coach, Consultant
Founder of MAGGIE CURRIE COACHING

Website:       http://www.maggiecurrie.co.uk

Facebook:    https://www.facebook.com/maggielifecoach/

Email:            hello@maggiecurrie.co.uk

Doing for Others

When we are feeling bad, often our first instinct is to isolate ourselves and focus on what we perceive is upsetting us. Sometimes we really do need some downtime, but more often the best way to get out of the blues quickly is to turn our attention to other people.  In being of service to others, paradoxically, we can often find answers to our own questions and solutions to our own problems. We may also end up feeling more connected to the people around us, as well as being empowered by the experience of helping someone.

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When we reach out to people we can help, we confirm that we are not alone in our own need for support and inspiration. We also remind ourselves that we are powerful and capable in certain ways. When our own problems or moods get the better of us, there is always someone else who can use our particular gifts and energy to help them out. They, in turn, remind us that we are not the only people in the world with difficulties or issues. We all struggle with the problems of life, and we all feel overwhelmed from time to time, but we can almost always find solace in service.

In the most ideal situation, the person we are helping sheds light on our own dilemma, sometimes with a direct piece of advice, and sometimes without saying anything at all. Often just the act of getting our minds out of the obsessive mode of trying to figure out what to do about our own life does the trick. Many great inventors and artists have found that the inspiration they need to get to the next level in their work comes not when they’re working but when they’re out walking or washing up. We do ourselves and everyone else a great service when we take a break from our sorrows and extend ourselves to someone in need.

If anything resonates with you in this article, I will be delighted to hear from you, and of course be happy to help you.

I offer coaching and mentoring to you – for you to make the changes you want to in your life. Build your confidence in your abilities.  Read my clients’ testimonials here. To help you to have more fun, more freedom and less stress. That is it. There is no catch. I believe in you.

Maggie Currie

maggieheart

Professional Transformational Coach, Consultant
Founder of MAGGIE CURRIE COACHING

Website:       http://www.maggiecurrie.co.uk

Facebook:    https://www.facebook.com/maggielifecoach/

Email:            hello@maggiecurrie.co.uk

Our Community Responsibility

It’s easy to get caught up in our personal lives and forget that we have an obligation to be responsible members of our communities. For some of us, expressing this responsibility is so interwoven into our personal lives that it is simply a natural extension of who we are. Others may need to take a moment to consider how to be more responsible for the community in which they live.  For those of you who live in large cities, you can start with our own vicinity. Anything you do on a small level will automatically ripple out into the larger system.

Business people communicating with each other against white
Communities thrive on the talents of their members, so one approach to community responsibility is to consider what you have to offer and find ways to bring that into your community. If you have a special gift when it comes to bringing people together, you might agree to host a party or event once a year that includes the whole community. Even a small open house in a small venue can accomplish a lot in terms of making people feel more connected and comfortable with each other. If you have a talent for organic gardening, you might offer to help people in your area plan their own organic gardens. You might be the go to person for neighbours who need someone to water their plants or care for their pets when they’re away. You might take an abandoned space in your community and galvanise others to help you transform it into a community garden or a playground for children. In an area where there are many homeless people, starting a soup kitchen or organising a Christmas meal makes a big difference not only to those in need but to those who want to help.

All fun days, picnics, and ceremonies started somewhere, with someone who wanted to give back to the community in which they lived. It’s not too late to propose and execute a new tradition in your own community, whether it’s a street party or an annual picnic. Your particular vision, gifts, and strengths are part of what makes your community unique, so as you recognise them in yourself, feel free to offer them to those who live in your vicinity. Whether your offerings are visionary or practical, they are the very essence of community.

If anything resonates with you in this article, I will be delighted to hear from you, and of course be happy to help you.

I offer coaching and mentoring to you – for you to make the changes you want to in your life. Build your confidence in your abilities.  Read my clients’ testimonials here. To help you to have more fun, more freedom and less stress. That is it. There is no catch. I believe in you.

Maggie Currie

maggieheart

Professional Transformational Coach, Consultant
Founder of MAGGIE CURRIE COACHING

Website:       http://www.maggiecurrie.co.uk

Facebook:    https://www.facebook.com/maggielifecoach/

Email:            hello@maggiecurrie.co.uk

The Best We Can Be – honouring our children

Everything we do and say in the presence of our children makes an impression on them. We may think we can get away with swearing or gossiping in front of them when they can’t talk, but we have forgotten that just because they can’t talk doesn’t mean they don’t hear. They are sensitive sponges absorbing their environment in ways we will never know. Even if the words don’t make sense to them, they make an impression, as does the energy behind the words. We honour our children when we acknowledge that they are fully present from the very beginning and when we offer ourselves to them in ways that model the best of what humans can be.

sisters

When we bring a child into the world, a great welling up of love and hope fills our hearts. We unequivocally want the very best for our children, and we want to be the best parents a child could ever want. We begin to see ourselves and our lives in a different light, and things that seemed okay before we had a child suddenly reveal themselves as problematical. This can lead to a somewhat mincing review of our habits of speech, thought and feeling, our relationships, and our physical habits. We may feel that we have put ourselves under a microscope, which can be stressful. However, it can also lead to a great healing of our own unresolved issues and, in turn, it enables us to be good parents to our children. Talking to other conscious parents about this life transformation can be very helpful.

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Our desire to become the best we can be is often strongest at the very beginning of a child’s life and sometimes loses its intensity as we grow accustomed to their presence. However, it is never too late to look at ourselves and notice whether we are offering our best to our children. That original welling up of love and hope can inspire us throughout our lives to be the best we can be.

If anything resonates with you from the above, I will be delighted to hear from you, and of course happy to help you.

I offer coaching and mentoring to you – for you to make changes if you want to in your life. To help you to have more fun, more freedom and less stress. That is it. There is no catch. I believe in you.

Maggie Currie

maggieheart
Professional Transformational Coach, Consultant
Founder of MAGGIE CURRIE COACHING

Website:       http://www.maggiecurrie.co.uk

Facebook:    https://www.facebook.com/maggielifecoach/

Email:            hello@maggiecurrie.co.uk

 

Being in the public eye doesn’t mean you can’t have a private life too

There are many people in the public eye, those who work in television, on the radio, in films, musicians and footballers to name but a few.

I believe that just because you are a ‘celebrity’ that you don’t have to reveal everything about yourself to the public.  And why indeed should they?

When a celebrity is at a gala dinner, opening a supermarket, making a speech or performing then they expect to have articles written about them and photographs taken of them, and for these to be published in the media for all to see.

However, if those same celebrities are out doing their personal shopping or taking their children to school or any other mundane every day task that we all do, then they don’t expect these articles and photographs to be taken. And quite rightly so, in my opinion.

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We are all human, whether celebrities or not, and it is always possible for any one of us to make a mistake.  Does the whole world need to know about that mistake? Does the whole world need to speculate on what will happen in the future? Does the whole world need a blow by blow account of what is happening? Does the whole world want to read made up stories about this person or that?

It is very easy to make a snap judgement about someone without knowing all the facts or even the person themselves.  And these judgements are made by reading the made up stories and speculations of others,

I think the answer is no, the whole world does not need to know.  It could so easily be someone you know, someone in your family, who has made a mistake and I am sure you would be extremely annoyed to have someone reporting everything they are doing daily. Just because you are in the public eye does not mean you are a fair target for the gossip mongers and those who love to put other people down.

Let people get on with their lives and, if possible, encourage them along the way. Let’s not speculate, make up stories or hound people just because they are a celebrity.  Have some compassion for your fellow human beings. Remember, it could one day be you or someone you know on the front page who has made a mistake. How will you feel then?

Maggie Currie

maggieheart
Professional Transformational Coach, Consultant
Founder of MAGGIE CURRIE COACHING

Website:       http://www.maggiecurrie.co.uk

Facebook:    https://www.facebook.com/maggielifecoach/

Email:            hello@maggiecurrie.co.uk

 

Bouncing back

Life happens.  It doesn’t matter how positive you are or how balanced and centred you are, there are going to be times when you are knocked sideways. Times when your carefully organized life is turned upside down and you get knocked for six.  Life happens!

You may be challenged with any number of situations that will leave you feeling like you were kicked in the stomach.  It may be the loss of a loved one, a divorce, the loss of a job.

Let’s face it. Things happen. They’re part of life and no matter how you try to explain them away with the idea that “everything happens for a reason,” they hurt. And they hurt a lot!

They hurt at the very core of your being. The pain begins in your heart and radiates throughout your entire being. Repeating positive phrases does not make it stop hurting.

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At times like these you’re probably going to feel down, maybe depressed. You will probably feel anger or some other manifestation of your pain. Whatever you’re feeling, it’s ok. It’s ok to feel hurt, sad, angry or whatever your true feelings are. You cannot deny pain any more than you can deny fear. The only way through this is to give yourself permission to feel the feeling.

The question is not whether or not you will feel down. The question is for how long will you stay in this state?

The difference between people who get through life’s challenging moments, regardless of the seriousness, and those who are immobilized by the events is their ability to bounce back.

How quickly can you bounce back?  Of course, the severity of the event will have a lot to do with the time it will take you to get past the pain and on with your life.

Take the example of two people being downsized from their job, something that is becoming a natural occurrence these days.  One is floored by the news of his dismissal.  He expresses his pain by becoming angry at his employers, his colleagues and the system in general.  He spends his days telling anyone who’ll listen, about his “problem.”

Usually from a barstool!

As he sees it, his life is ruined and he’s blaming everyone for his troubles.  People who react like this spend weeks, even months or years, wallowing in despair until, if they’re fortunate, someone close to them convinces them to seek professional help.

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On the other hand, the other person reacts very differently.  Although they have gone through the same experience, and have pretty much the same issues like living expenses, etc., they choose to react differently.

After a brief period of feeling a loss of self-esteem, self-pity and anger, they decide to get back in the game. They begin contacting their network of colleagues, avail themselves of the courses and other services their former employer offered everyone and starts actively looking for a new position.  In a short time they find their “dream job” with an exciting new company.

While both people in our hypothetical example had the same experience and both went through a period of hurting, the time each allowed themselves to remain in that dis-empowering state was vastly different.  While one remained “stuck” in their problem, the other handled their loss and moved on with their life.

This is the key. It’s not whether life occasionally puts you into a tailspin, it’s how long you choose to remain there.

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When something devastating happens to you, allow yourself some time to grieve your loss.  However, don’t allow yourself to get stuck there. Take some action. Join a support group, talk about your feelings with a trusted friend or your spiritual advisor.  If necessary, seek professional help.

In the case of a job loss, perhaps you might want to take some time to re-evaluate your career goals. You may even consider a change in career altogether. When you’re ready, you can begin networking and making new contacts.  Attend social or networking events. Call people you know. Do something!

One of the most important things to remember in high stress situations is not to allow yourself to become isolated. While spending some time alone is normal, even necessary, isolation can be dangerous and should be avoided at all costs. Get out and be with people as soon as possible.

As a friend recently reminded me, “life is for the living.” It’s important to get back to your life. In time, the pain will pass.

If anything resonates with you from the above, I will be delighted to hear from you, and of course happy to help you, please contact me .

I am helping people to become the very best version of themselves and would love to work with you too.

Maggie Currie

maggieheart
Professional Transformational Coach, Consultant
Founder of MAGGIE CURRIE COACHING

Website:       http://www.maggiecurrie.co.uk

Facebook:    https://www.facebook.com/maggielifecoach/

Email:            hello@maggiecurrie.co.uk

Friends come and go

 I was considering why it is that friends come into our lives and some of them go out of our lives again.

There are many and varied reasons I suspect, but for me I think that some people fall away because of the changes I have made to myself.   I have learned so much about myself over the past few years that I was unaware of before. For instance I didn’t realise until recently that I have stuffed emotions and feelings down for years because I was conditioned growing up not to show emotion or share feelings.

When I was in a toxic relationship I had very few friends, and those I did have were not that close.  I wasn’t allowed to get close to anybody.  Getting divorced and learning to live my life as me has been a steep learning curve.

Four Women Friends at the Beach

I have learned how to express my feelings, get close to people I really like and keep others at arms length.  Now that I am able to express emotions and share my feelings other people may find this unacceptable to them. And that is okay. What I am comfortable with is not always comfortable for everyone else. And that may be why some friends have moved away. The fact that other people think differently from me is perfectly okay.

The friends I have currently are wonderful. Some live nearby, some live on different continents, but I am grateful to them all for their friendship and support. I do my best to support all my friends, it may be in a big way or in a small way. My life is so much richer for having my friends in it.

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I am grateful for all the friends I have had, still have and those I have yet to meet for their contributions to my life.

Do you have friends in your life that you are grateful for? Have you had friends move away for one reason or another? Is your life richer for having your friends in it?

Maggie Currie

maggieheart
Transformational Coach, Consultant
Founder of MAGGIE CURRIE COACHING

Website:       http://www.maggiecurrie.co.uk

Facebook:    https://www.facebook.com/maggielifecoach/

Email:            hello@maggiecurrie.co.uk

The terror attack on 22nd March 2017 in London

I looked on in horror at the television reports of the terror attack on Westminster Bridge in London.  There were so many people affected, either being physically injured by the marauding vehicle or jumping off the bridge to escape.  Five people have died in this pointless attack, one a policeman who was fatally stabbed protecting our country.

My heart went out to the many tourists who had been caught up in this atrocity and I wondered what on earth I could do, if anything, to help those and all the citizens of London who have been permanently damaged, either physically or mentally.

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There was nothing I could do from where I live on the Isle of Wight, nearly 4 hours away, at that time.  I could only send positive and healing thoughts to all those involved.

I read about the black cab drivers who were taking people home at no cost to make sure they were ok.  How wonderful to have that great act of kindness.

I read about the Uber drivers who were charging four times the fares to take people home. Such greed.

I wondered what I can do to help.  I thought about it. What I can do now is help some of those who have been affected by listening to them, as often getting their own thoughts out of their heads is vital in their healing process.  There would be no charge from me. I want to help in some small way.  If you have been affected by this terror attack, or know someone who has, get in touch and I will listen and help where I can.

Maggie Currie

maggieheart
Transformational Coach, Consultant
Founder of MAGGIE CURRIE COACHING

Website:       http://www.maggiecurrie.co.uk

Facebook:    https://www.facebook.com/maggielifecoach/

Email:            hello@maggiecurrie.co.uk