Are you holding on to things you feel you ‘should’ do?

A lot of people carry around with them a whole load of “baggage” or “clutter” in their minds. When I say this I mean that they are still holding onto things that they feel they ‘should’ do, but  they really don’t want or need to. For instance the person who they had a row with, but neither is now speaking to the other – but both want to only they both feel the other ‘should’ get in touch first.  The ‘coulds’ and ‘shoulds’ in your life that hold you back – you want to let go, but you don’t.

This is very common and you are definitely not alone, I have done it myself.

Are you carrying around with you a lot of emotional baggage that you could be doing without? If you were to lose that emotional weight you could be focusing on something more productive instead.

Does this resonate with you?  If you are carrying around a lot of emotional baggage, I bet it has a negative influence on your confidence and self esteem.

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Take a look at your life and begin to get rid of this baggage by asking yourself some questions and by completing the following exercise.  In effect, what you are doing is making certain tasks “complete”, drawing a line under them and moving on.

Another term for this is “psychological completion” or just “completion”.

Take as long or as short a time as you like to answer these questions and finish the exercise. By writing your answers down they become more real.

Get to it and watch your confidence soar!

  • Make a list of 10 things that you are putting up with at home
  • Make a list of 10 things that you are putting up with at work
  • Make a list of 10 things that you are putting up with in any other areas of your life

Make an action plan to get rid of or communicate to others about the things that you have been putting up with. Take action!

  • Make a list of things that are unresolved/unfinished in your life.

Make an action plan to reduce this number! Take action!

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  • Do you need to clear the air with anyone? If so, just do it! Life is too short!
  • Did you ever say that you were going to call someone or keep in touch with someone yet have done nothing about it? If yes, call them or send a card or an email to them today

Let go of as many coulds, woulds, shoulds, maybes, oughts as you can. Take action!

By completing these exercises you will be able to focus more on the here and the now. You will now be able to let go of some of the things that have been taking up your valuable attention – those things that knock your self esteem.

If you need help with any of the above, I will be delighted to hear from you, please contact me .

I am helping people to become the very best version of themselves and would love to work with you too.

Maggie Currie

maggieheart
Professional Transformational Coach, Consultant
Founder of MAGGIE CURRIE COACHING

Website:       http://www.maggiecurrie.co.uk

Facebook:    https://www.facebook.com/maggielifecoach/

Email:            hello@maggiecurrie.co.uk

What makes a very good relationship last?

I believe a good relationship is based on trust, love, respect, listening, learning, giving and taking.  Communication of course is essential.  If you don’t communicate effectively with each other, then the relationship will fail. Whether the relationship is a marriage or a friendship, those bases have to be covered or the relationship will not flourish.

I have been married to my husband for 29 years and we love each deeply.  We also trust each other implicitly.  I always listen to what my husband has to say, and mostly he listens to what I have to say.  We don’t always agree, but we respect each other’s opinion.  There is also the factor of knowing that we are there for each other to support and encourage in low times and to praise and celebrate with each other in the high times.  We each know that we can depend upon each other no matter what.  Our communication works, we are honest with each other and there are no secrets (with the exception of birthday and Christmas presents of course).

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I have very few good friends who I would trust with my life.  But those I do have know that equally they can trust me with their lives.  I have one friend in particular who I have known since I was 9 years old.  We are good friends.  We live hundreds of miles apart, but we manage to get together at least once a year and to keep in touch via email and social media.  We love each other as friends, trust and respect each other, learn from each other even now after all these years.

I have a good relationship with my mother, this has not always been the case, but I have learned that we do love each other, respect each other’s opinions and although we live about two hours away from each other, we communicate via phone every so often and I visit her many times a year. She is going to be 90 this year, still lives in her own home, and is surprisingly spritely for her age.

Here are some tips to help make your relationship last:

  • Be honest with each other. If you have made a mistake then admit it, apologise. Don’t let your ego get in the way.
  • If your partner makes a mistake and apologises, is it always their fault? Did they know what you expected of them? Was your communication clear? If not, can you take responsibility and admit that?
  • Say I love you to your partner or friend and mean it. They will be feeling on top of the world because they feel loved and wanted.  This will reflect back on you and make you feel the same.
  • Say thank you. That has a similar effect to saying I love you. Being appreciated means so much in a relationship.
  • Don’t forget that you are still your own person and your partner or friend is still their own person.  Have your own set of friends that you can go out with now and again, without your partner.  Being together all the time can be very suffocating and can cause damage to a relationship.
  • Share your secrets. Know the trivial things about your partner that nobody else knows.

If you don’t have a good relationship with someone, is there something missing? Do you trust each other, respect each other, listen to each other, learn from each other and love each other?

Four Women Friends at the Beach

The best part I find of being in a relationship is that I am not in it alone.  I have someone to love, to work with and work things out with.

No relationship is perfect, it would be terribly boring if it were.  But you are in the relationship with someone you love and who loves you. Cuddle your partner when you go to sleep at night – there is nothing more comforting than having a loving pair of arms around you when you go to sleep and when you wake in the morning.

All of these things will help to make a good relationship last.

I am helping people to become the very best version of themselves, and I have some availability for coaching clients, we just need to fix some dates when you want to get started. Get in touch today.

Maggie Currie 

Creedence – Confidence for You

International Confidence Coach, Motivational Speaker, Author

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