How to break bad habits

What are your bad habits? First you have to identify the habits that you want to break.  The ones you really don’t want to hang to. The ones you consider to be bad habits.

  • Smoking?
  • Talking too much?
  • Drinking?
  • Untidiness?

Whether it’s that perpetual pile of clothes in the corner you’re waiting to someday turn into gold, a self-proclaimed disability which renders you unable to refrain from interrupting, or a knack for timing your exit just so, so that someone else is continually left to do the washing up, now’s the time to extinguish these habits before they turn into next year’s resolutions.

Here are some of the reasons why.

1.      It’s not fair to others. One of the great universal laws ruling our wonderful planet says that you get back what you put out there.

Do you want others to be kind and considerate to you?  Then start putting the considerate, kind vibes out there and pick up your clothes, do the washing up, and stop interrupting or whatever it is you or a collective “others” define as a bad habit.

2.    It’s not fair to you.  I’m sure you’re a nice person, and you pride yourself on having generous, warmhearted traits.  So, it’s not fair to you either that this simple, little, annoying thing you do can wield the power that it now, or will soon have.

These tiny culprits have been known to ruin marriages, friendships, and cause the downfall of many a mighty person.  Plus you’ll feel better about yourself.

3.   Your success depends on it. Bad habits have a funny way of scope and context creep.

First they only happen in certain situations, and the next thing you know, you’re at a business function swirling your fingers through the chip dip. Put an end to it now before situations that require your utmost polish become tarnished by these terribly annoying little monsters.

4.   You probably don’t like it when others do the same thing. Think about it.  If someone did the same thing to you, would it bother you?

 How do I know I am in a relationship that is bad for me?

Be honest.

Sometimes all it takes is a simple exercise in empathy to find the motivation to quit whatever it is we could benefit from stopping.

5.   List your own reasons. But be sincere and totally honest.

What is it costing you to perpetuate these habits?

Whether it’s a moment of peace, seemingly perpetual nagging, or simple anxiety resulting from anticipation of the next blow-up or negative comment, you owe it to yourself to commit to your ongoing personal development, and to the elimination of any behaviour whose costs far outweigh the benefits.

 

So how do you begin?

Just like breaking a smoking habit, bad habits have a way of creeping up on us and slowly over time becoming somewhat akin to an appendage—i.e. they’re hard to get rid of.

Here are some tips for breaking these bad habits:

Start small: 

While it might not be reasonable to expect that you can just stop whatever you’re doing overnight, identify what might constitute as a small step in the right direction? Write down what that step is and carry it out over the next 21 days.

For example, if you are smoking 40 a day, cut that down to 20 for the next 21 days.  Make that behaviour a habit before you cut that down to 15 for the next 21 days and then 10 and so on.

 Commit: 

Make a commitment to yourself that you will make this shift, and if reinforcement and punishment works—use it!  Think about how you might reward yourself for making the change.  Or, consider how you might penalise yourself if you don’t.

For instance in our smoking example. Put the money you would have spent on the cigarettes in a jar and at the end of the 21 days add it all up and buy yourself a treat for example.

From cutting down to 20 smokes a day from 40 smokes a day, over a 21-day period at £8 a packet that will save you £168 in just 3 weeks!

Also, write two lists, one of the reasons why you are doing this and also a list of the things that you will miss out on if you keep on doing your bad habit.

Identify alternatives:

What are some alternatives to the behaviour you are demonstrating? Is there a quick fix or solution that might help provide an alternative—e.g. put a laundry basket by the bedside (one to match with the décor) so that you don’t end up with a pile on the floor.

Get help: 

Ask someone to help keep you accountable.  If they’ve been victims of this bad habit, they’ll most likely be thrilled you asked! Or seek professional help from a coach or mentor who will definitely hold you accountable. A coach will be non-judgemental and will offer you praise when it is due.

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 Ask for feedback: 

Because human nature dictates that we will only complain when you offend, rather than amend, ask for feedback frequently.

Don’t assume, no news is good news, but be sure to get praise when praise is due. Remember to reward yourself when you achieve your short term goals, your medium term goals and your long term goals.  It doesn’t have to be something expensive, although it can be.  It could be a cream tea by the sea, or a cup of coffee, or a small box of chocolates.  You decide what your rewards will be and make sure you reward yourself.

I am here to help, so call me and we can talk about how I can help you.

 

Maggie Currie

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Can life coaching help me sort out my life?

Yes, I believe that it will help you sort out your life.  Coaching draws out rather than puts in. I find it is reactive, flexible and enabling. My coaching style is non-judgemental, helps people to develop and grow in a variety of areas.

My approach to coaching is to get the very best out of someone and giving them the confidence to make decisions that will improve their life.

When my clients experience being coached, their motivation comes from working with me who is an upbeat, positive role model. I want my clients to reach their full potential and when they do it gives me tremendous job satisfaction. Helping clients discover where they want to go and then helping them to get there is so rewarding to me.

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What makes me a great coach?

  • I like people and want to bring out the best in them
  • I want my clients to do something more fulfilling in their lives
  • I enjoy personal and financial freedom
  • I have natural ‘people’ skills.

Interestingly, a great deal of the life coaching and personal coaching I do is carried out on the telephone. Some of my clients I have never actually met in person. For several reasons coaching is just as effective over the telephone as it is face-to-face. In fact, many of my clients prefer to speak over the telephone. It is very convenient for both myself and my client, and it offers greater flexibility since we all have busy lifestyles. Coaching over the telephone offers other obvious advantages:

  • coaching can be conducted wherever I and my client happen to be – anywhere in the world
  • there’s no travelling time or travel cost involved
  • I don’t need offices, meeting rooms, staff or other expensive overheads

Having said that, I enjoy face-to-face coaching too, as I love the personal contact and appreciate the one-to-one feel of the coaching session.  I meet my clients at a mutually agreeable venue, a quiet corner of a café, in their client’s home or office, in my home or office or wherever is convenient.

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 My coaching sessions are typically sixty minutes, though sometimes longer.

Some of the things I practice in my coaching:

  • Listening to what has been said, and what hasn’t been said
  • What motivates people must be understood
  • Everyone is capable of achieving more
  • Finding solutions not creating more problems
  • A person’s past is no indication of their future
  • People’s beliefs about what is possible for themselves are their only limits
  • I always provide full support
  • I can’t provide the answers, but I can draw them out of my clients
  • I never criticise my clients
  • All my coaching is completely confidential
  • Some people’s needs cannot be met by coaching, and I recognise clients with these needs and refer them to a specialty that will help them

So, to answer the original question “Can Life Coaching help you sort your life out?”  Yes, I believe it can.  Life coaching is what you make it. If you wish to set and achieve goals, accept yourself and become everything you are capable of becoming then working with a Life Coach is for you.

I also offer a money back guarantee.  If you don’t change something about your life when coaching with me, I will give you your money back.

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 Contact me today to have a free chat on how my coaching will help you to sort out your life.

 

Maggie Currie

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It’s All About You!

I don’t know about you, but this is one of my favourite times.  A time when I take stock of the last year and where that got me and when I start to look at the year ahead and get excited about everything that I’m doing and aiming for in this year.

I’ve noticed that I’m not alone in this.  Lots of people that I’ve spoken to in the past couple of weeks have been experiencing a mix of the dynamic “Right! a year has gone by, and I’m going to do something different that’s going to make my life so much better!” and the well-known “Oh, but I’m too (insert the applicable response) ……..tired, broke, cold, miserable” excuse for inactivity.

Do you recognise that in yourself or anybody around you?

Well, we’re going to look at how you can beat the winter blues simply by making it all about you.  So I suggest that if there is somebody close to you that’s walking around feeling miserable… send this to them quickly!  For those that have already beaten the blues and are charging ahead with making their plans for the Spring – well done!  You can also use these tips to add more energy to your resolve.

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With the many different roles that we undertake in our lives these days, we can so easily get caught up in playing each one, and everything it entails that, for a time, we lose ourselves in the mix.  This is especially true going through and after divorce.

What we do on a daily basis can stop being about choice and start being purely about obligation.  This can be particularly highlighted over the festive season when we had to drag ourselves up to go to yet another gathering when deep down we’d really have liked to stay in bed for a lay-in and really wish we’d never agreed to go in the first place!  No wonder so many people feel burnt out by the time they reach the end of winter.

Well now is a great time to step back and bring the focus back to you.  Not only is it the simplest way of beating winter blues, it’s a great way to give an extra energy boost to your plans and get the best start.

So be really honest with yourself , how good are you at focusing on you? How often do you put yourself before anything or anybody else?

For many of us, as we continue to juggle our commitments, obligations and other people’s needs, it’s not often enough.  Perhaps we feel that it’s selfish to focus on ourselves when there are so many other people and jobs demanding our attention.  But are we getting it wrong?

Think about it for a moment.

How differently would you feel if you put yourself first more often?  If you were to do more of what you wanted to do?  Would you feel more tired, stressed, time-poor, lacklustre?  Or would you feel quite the opposite?

Our energy levels are directly related to how we feel.  If we do little for ourselves we feel fed up, over-stretched, put upon, and we tend to have low energy levels.  With low energy levels we feel less inclined to do the things we know we need to do, let alone anything else on top.  We also work more slowly and so become time-poor.

Whereas if we consciously put ourselves first and look after our own needs and wants, we feel happier, more fulfilled, lighter, and our energy levels soar.  When we have more energy we’re more productive so we get more done in the same or less time, making it possible to fulfil our commitments as well as looking after ourselves.

Sometimes we get so caught up with the roles we undertake, the commitments we have and the people around us, that we forget that we have a choice.  Try to choose one thing just for you.  Do it and see how different you feel.  See also the amazing knock-on effect that has.

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Top 5 Tips for Putting Yourself First

  1.  Don’t say ‘yes’ when you mean ‘no’!  How often do you do this? How does it feel?  Not good?  When you’re asked to do something, give it some thought and give an answer that’s true to you.  You will feel so much better when you say yes only when you mean it.
  2. Do something different.  If you feel tired or over-committed, the chances are you didn’t choose to feel that way.  By consciously breaking your routine (even if it’s only for one day) and doing something out of the ordinary, you have taken back your right  to choose.  Choose something that will give you a buzz and see what a difference it makes.
  3. Know what gives you energy.  Make yourself a list of all the things that put a big smile on your face and make you feel great.  Things that are focused on and all about you.  Then when you need a boost you have a ready-made list of pick-me-ups to choose from.
  4. Set aside time for you, and only you, regularly.   Whether it’s signing up to a series of classes, doing an activity you really enjoy or simply setting aside a couple of hours at a time to do exactly as you please, that may include doing absolutely nothing.  You don’t have to do it alone, just make sure that whatever it is, you are doing it for you.  Put it in the diary and stick to it!
  5. Have a plan.  If you know what you’re aiming for and you have a plan for how you’re going to get there… you will have all the motivation you need to drive you forward with the focus firmly on you.  Imagine the energy that will create!

If you need help focusing on you, contact me.  I will delighted to coach you.  I look forward to hearing from you.

Maggie Currie 

Creedence – Confidence for You

I am helping people to become the very best version of themselves so that they can have more fun, live a better life and enjoy their work.

 

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“I’m ACE!” – The 7 day challenge

Here is a short confidence building exercise for you. If you are up for the challenge that is!

At the end of each day, for 7 days I want you to write down 5 things that happened throughout the day that proved that you are ACE! Now if this doesn’t come naturally to you, you’re going to have to go out and make things happen.

Don’t ignore the little things as well.

You can include such things as complimenting someone, a good piece of work you did, the 30 minutes you spent with the kids when you would normally be watching TV – write down 5 things where you have added value to something or someone each day for 7 days.

 

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GO FOR IT!

The 7 Day Challenge Template

Write out each “ACE STATEMENT” in the following format:

Number 1 was when I…

It meant that…

Afterwards I felt…

Number 2 was when I…..

It meant that…….

Afterwards I felt……

And so on until you have written down 5 things that happened throughout the day that proved that you are ACE!

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After the 7 days are up, look back over your list your will be truly amazed at how ACE you are!

The following week, repeat the exercise but with 5 new things each day, and also make a plan for each day, just like the little dog in the cartoon above.

Remind yourself of this challenge every time you feel that you are not good enough, because you are good enough and you are ACE!

Contact me today, and we can have a chat on how I can help you. There is so much more information for you to see about my coaching on my website, take a look.

Maggie Currie 

Creedence – Confidence for You

I am helping people to become the very best version of themselves so that they can have more fun, live a better life and enjoy their work.

 

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Time for action!

As a very busy coach I am lucky enough to be in a position where, on a daily basis, the fascinating people I work with tell me all about their big dreams, grand plans and compelling goals.  Dreams, plans and goals that they have possibly never shared with  another living soul.  And I can tell you that there are some amazing potential futures out there for these people!

So what will be the deciding factor as to whether these big dreams remain as dreams or become a wonderful and vibrant reality?  A few words come to mind – clarity, vision, belief, motivation, support – all play a part.  But the deciding factor in every case is – will this person take action?  Will they act upon what they want and work towards making it happen?

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All too often people don’t realise their ambitions and make their dreams a reality because their aspirations remain as something that they think about, rather than something that they do or create.  Having put all that effort into the thinking, dreaming and planning they find reasons not to do anything about it. And the fail to write them down.  Only when the dreams and aspirations are written down do they become goals.

Interestingly, the most common reason that I hear for inaction is ‘no time’.  How often do you hear people say “If only I had the time”? We all have the same number of hours in a day, it is how we manage those hours that makes the difference.

There is such a time-poor mentality around these days that we often appear to believe we have run out of time, or that there is literally none to spare because it’s already been spent on the other stuff in our lives.  Time is ‘taken up’ by so many things that  when it comes to the big goals and ambitions that require action, we don’t feel we have any left.

Added to that, the nature of some of these wonderful dreams that people have (eg. retraining for a new career) mean that they can take a certain amount of time to come to fruition, and there can be a sense of “but it would just take so long!”.

The thing is though time is passing anyway.  Regardless of whether we take action, use it constructively and make it count, it is going by at the same rate.  The real key to success is to decide to use it in the best way possible for what is most important to us.

We allow so many less important things to drain our time when we could choose at any moment to use it in a better way, in such a way that we make progress and start heading towards where we want to be.  So that in a year or two years time, we’ll be in a different place to the place we’re in now.  Well on our way to one of those compelling potential futures.  Or perhaps by that time it will be our reality?

Is it time for you to take action?

Your life does not resemble anybody else's

Do you have a dream or an ambition in which you’ve invested lots of thinking and planning time, but haven’t taken action on?  If so, keep reading!

Ask yourself:

  • What needs to happen for me to achieve this?  What are all the steps?
  • What is stopping me from taking action?  How long will I allow these things to stop me?
  • What is the one thing I could do in the next 24 hours to know that I have started taking action?
  • Will you do it?

Get in touch today and we can have a free informal chat on how I can help you to take action and achieve your goals.

Maggie Currie 

Creedence – Confidence for You

I am helping people to become the very best version of themselves.

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Your assertive rights

In the continuing journey of building confidence it is essential that you implement your assertive rights so that your life is as happy as it can be.

I have included your assertive rights below, and I would like you to read them and be aware that you do have the right to implement them, no matter what other people think.

 

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ASSERTIVE RIGHTS

  1. I have the right to judge my own behaviour, thoughts and emotions and to take the responsibility for their initiation and consequences upon myself.
  2. I have the right to offer no reasons or excuses to justify my behaviour.
  3. I have the right to judge whether I am responsible for finding solutions to other people’s problems.
  4. I have the right to change my mind.
  5. I have the right to make mistakes and be responsible for them.
  6. I have the right to say “I don’t know”.
  7. I have the right to be independent of the goodwill of others before coping with them.
  8. I have the right to be illogical in making decisions.
  9. I have the right to say “I don’t understand”.
  10. I have the right to say “I don’t care”.
  11. I have the right to say “No”.

When you read and absorb these assertive rights and then begin to implement them in your daily life you will notice the difference.  Don’t think that other people won’t notice, they will, and they will probably be surprised.  So what?

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Let them get over it and continue to assert your rights on a daily basis.  It will increase your confidence and reduce the risk of you being treated as a doormat who always says yes or agrees with everything everybody else says or does.

Your life will improve, and you will boost your confidence by implementing your assertive rights on a regular basis.

Maggie Currie 

Creedence – Confidence for You

Helping people to become the very best version of themselves.

International Confidence Coach, Motivational Speaker, Author

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Whatever we believe becomes our reality

We tend to ignore information that we think is inconsistent with our reality. Successful people absolutely believe that they have the ability to succeed. They do not think or talk about the possibilities of failing. They do not even consider the possibility of failure.

We usually act in a manner consistent with our beliefs. The most important belief system we can build is one where we absolutely believe that we are going succeed. This is called positive thinking, confirming our reality that we absolutely know that no matter what, we will be successful.

Often positive thinking is difficult because our parents or guardians only gave love and approval to their children when they did something that they wanted them to do.  If we grew up with this kind of conditional love we will inevitably tend to seek unconditional approval from others.  When we become adults, this need for approval from the parent is transferred to the workplace and to our boss or workmates. We can become preoccupied with the opinion of the boss and some totally imagined high standard.

 

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If we can change the way we think about ourselves and our potential, we can open new doors to unlimited possibilities and point ourselves in the right direction to a better, more fulfilling professional and personal life.  We should not think about what other people think of us, but we should concentrate on what we want and adjust our thinking so that we will achieve it. 

To begin to change the way we think about ourselves, we need to stimulate our imaginations.  This can be done by writing down a clear and detailed description of our ideal outcome.  We must be absolutely clear about the outcome, but we must also be flexible about the process of achieving it. 

There is a method you can use to see yourself having achieved your outcome.  It is called the ‘Hindsight Tool’.  It works like this:  

  • Think about the outcome you want, visualise yourself as having achieved it.

  • Then use the ‘hindsight tool’  – In your mind imagine yourself in, say, five years’ time, picture yourself being the successful person you want to be. How would you look? What would you be wearing? What would you be saying or doing?  Who would be around you, who wouldn’t be around you? Where would you be?

  • Then, turn round and look back to the present and see what course and actions you took, what mistakes you may have made and how you corrected them.

Your life does not resemble anybody else's

It may be that the outcome you imagined is not exactly what you hoped for.  That is fine and very normal.  Re-think your outcome and do the process over again.  You can do this many times until you get the outcome you want.  Then put it all into practice.

If you need help with any of the above, contact me.  

I am helping people to become the very best version of themselves and would love to work with you.

I have some availability for new coaching clients, we just need to fix some dates for when you want to get started.  Get in touch today.

Maggie Currie 

Creedence – Confidence for You

International Confidence Coach, Motivational Speaker, Author

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How you can get the most out of your coaching sessions

Coaching is the key to transforming your life.It begins with helping you to understand where you are now and to obtain clarity about what you would like to achieve and how you will achieve it.  I then work with you to create and execute a plan of action to move you forward and transform your life.  You’ll be educated, entertained and inspired to take action immediately, and I promise you’ll find clear, logical, easy-to-implement ideas – most of which will make a difference to your life straight away. Remember, You can’t go back and make a new beginning, but you can start today to make a new ending.

Do you have a dream? I am sure you do. Become really passionate about it, enthuse to others about it, create a picture in your mind of what your dream will look like when you make it happen.  Make the picture as bright and colourful as you can.  Add sounds, smells – whatever you feel makes the picture complete.

Begin to do as many things as you can to bring that picture you have in your mind into form. You don’t need to change everything in your life to achieve it – just take baby steps towards it…gently…slowly.

 

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In the words of  Robert Heinlein “In the absence of clearly defined goals, we become strangely loyal to performing daily trivia and ultimately become enslaved by it.”

You have a dream; have you set your goals to make that dream come true?  Don’t let it sit in your imagination or your heart forever …trust in you… let it out…..let it come to life.

Take the opportunity to invest in yourself. This investment won’t let you down. The more things change, the more YOU can’t afford not to.

Coaching sessions are focused and forward thinking, allowing you to get the results you need quickly and enjoyably and ensuring you get great value for money. 

If you are stuck at any point by fear of the unknown, I can help with various techniques, such as NLP and TFT, to rid you of the anxiety associated with fears, life traumas etc., and thus help you to move forward with your life.

 

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I have worked with a vast range of clients, male and female, young and old, each with their own unique lifestyles and challenges.  I am proud to be able to say that every one of them has benefited from my coaching.  Many of them have made massive changes to their lives, such as changing careers, moving to another part of the country and starting a new life, ending a relationship that wasn’t working, improving their home/work balance.

Don’t be one of the 90% of people who will look back with regret, knowing their lives could have been different. Take this golden opportunity to be fulfilled and live the dream. Have what you want, do what you want and be the person you have always wanted to be.  

Every single one of us is capable of achieving truly amazing things, but you have to choose. Are you going to be one of the 10% or one of the 90%?

It is time now for you to take action and to really begin to change your life.  I am helping people to become the very best version of themselves and would love to work with you.

I have some availability for new coaching clients, we just need to fix some dates for when you want to get started.  Get in touch today.

 

Maggie Currie 

Creedence – Confidence for You

International Confidence Coach, Motivational Speaker, Author

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