Fast forward 1 year – what do you see for yourself?

How would you like to see yourself in a year’s time?  Would it be the same as now, or with slight changes or a whole new look?

Currently my life is:

  • My relationship with myself looks pretty good at the moment. I treat myself with respect and gratitude and take notice of the good thoughts, I acknowledge the not so good thoughts and endeavour to take no notice them beyond that.
  • My thoughts are generally positive but occasionally a negative thought will creep in. This is normal for everyone.
  • My relationship with my husband is fantastic, we love and respect each other and make each other laugh.
  • My relationship with my mother is good, we see each other fairly regularly, my father passed away some years ago, but is always in my heart and mind.
  • My relationship with two of my children is virtually non-existent (their choice which I respect) and with the third it is quite long distance and variable.
  • My physical health is pretty good, I am slightly overweight and making an effort to change this and I currently feel great.
  • My finances are reasonably okay, but could of course be a lot better. Bank account is in the black and the cash flow is restricted.
  • My business world consists of coaching, I am self-employed and an entrepreneur. I am the business.
  • I am peaceful in my life, asking the Universe for what I want, although I could ask more often. I don’t meditate.
  • For fun I work at pop festivals and trade by offering Indian head massage to all the punters at the festivals.
  • I take time for myself every day, even if it is only 5 minutes.

‘Get back to me retreat’ Friday March 15th to Sunday March 17th 2013

In a year’s time I see for me:

  • An even better relationship with myself.
  • Fewer negative thoughts creeping in.
  • A continuing fantastic relationship with my husband.
  • A great relationship with my mother.
  • A better relationship with my daughter.
  • Better health, less overweight.
  • Fabulous finances.
  • Business booming.
  • Peaceful in life and asking and receiving more from the Universe.
  • Still enjoying pop festivals.
  • My third book published.
  • Taking more time for myself every day.

Take a few moments to think about your future.  Is there anything you would like to see differently? What are you prepared to do to bring about those changes?

If you need help get in touch today and we can get a date in the diary for a chat.

 

 Maggie Currie

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© Maggie Currie and Maggie Currie Coaching, 2011-2016. Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this blog’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Maggie Currie and maggiecurrie.com with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

What are your perceptions and beliefs?

Whether you realise it or not, you are constantly in the process of creating and changing your reality.

You are not truly aware of what someone else’s reality really looks like, and they are not truly aware of what your reality looks like. You are only aware of your own reality and how it looks to you.

Don’t believe me?  Take a simple scenario.  A road traffic accident, where nobody is hurt, fortunately, when one car hits another car.  There are three witnesses.  A policeman will ask each witness what he or she saw.  There will be three completely different perceptions of the same incident.

For instance, one person might state that they saw the first car brake suddenly, so the driver of the car behind (being far too close in their perception) braked really hard but the car was going too fast and ran into the car in front with a loud bang.

The second person saw the second car approaching the car in front too fast and the driver didn’t appear to even see the car in front and ran straight into it without braking.

The third person witnessed the first car slow down too much so the driver of the car behind (which wasn’t going too fast) couldn’t quite stop in time (though they tried) and hit the car in front really hard.

Three different perceptions of the same accident – each quite ‘real’ to those witnesses – but significantly dissimilar.

How you perceive your life and everything around you will differ dramatically from other people’s perceptions.  Your reality is totally unique to you.

How you think about your life, how you see yourself in the mirror, and what you believe is happening to you at any given moment, will be the reality that exists for you.

heartmirror

You’d better believe it!
So what are your beliefs?  They are your views, judgments, guiding principles and decisions about yourself, family and friends, communities, organisations, employers and everything else you come into contact with.

Your beliefs filter everything you see, hear and feel around you and, as a result, determine the meaning you attach to any event. Your beliefs act as self-fulfilling prophecies. If you think that you can’t do something and then find it extremely difficult to do and give up trying, you have successfully fulfilled your belief that you can’t do it.  What would have happened if you had believed that you could do it?  Would your reality have been different?

Your beliefs, whether they be limiting or empowering, determine your actions, and your actions in turn verify your beliefs. Over time, as you collect more evidence to prove your beliefs, your beliefs become your reality.

Your beliefs operate in your subconscious mind and influence your conscious mind, as I mentioned in the previous chapter; they affect your thoughts and behaviour. Whilst you are aware of many of your beliefs, in general, your most influential beliefs are stored away in your subconscious mind.

There are some beliefs you view as absolute truths and never question – that is just the way the world is! A change in your beliefs can have a major impact on how you live your life and the behaviours you manifest.

Once you believe in something, you tend to ignore opposite examples and accept only those events that reinforce that belief.

As Henry Ford, industrialist, said:‘Whether you believe you can or believe you can’t, you are probably right.’

How right he was.

henry ford

Henry Ford

Do you currently have beliefs that keep your reality comfortable and safe and that prevent you from exploring your true potential?  Do you choose to acknowledge only the reality that is predicted by your limiting beliefs and then use these observations as proof that your current reality is indeed true?

Is it time to step out of your comfort zone and set sail into the unknown?  To push the boundaries of what you think you know and discover new lands and opportunities – to challenge yourself to create your new reality?

This is an excerpt from my book ‘What you believe creates your reality‘. If anything resonates with you, please buy it, read it, take action………………….change your life.

 Maggie Currie

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How to change your behaviours

Your behaviour develops your character. OK, you have learned where your beliefs come from, and you are now aware that you can change your attitudes.  You have realised that your perception of life is totally unique.  You have discovered that your subconscious mind is ruling the roost. And you have found out that you are living each day by the habits built up in the subconscious mind and that you weren’t even aware of it.

All this sounds pretty negative, doesn’t it?  Well it really isn’t.  Knowing all this is positive as it now means that you have the power to change things, and you can now be well on the way to making your reality what you want it to be, instead of what your subconscious thinks you want it to be.

Now you know how to change your attitude to someone or something you can begin to change your behaviour as well.

Same old same old
Let me explain. It may be that your typical weekday is made up of a regular pattern of behaviour that you have been following for some years.  It could be that you get up at 7a.m., complete your morning ablutions, go to the kitchen, turn on the television, put the kettle on, make tea/coffee, eat your cereal and toast while getting dressed.  Leave for work at 7.45a.m. and it is all a bit of a rush.  You go outside and get in your car and drive to work and you always get caught in a traffic jam and, more often than not, you arrive at work just in time to sit at your desk before the boss comes in at 9a.m., and you are all flustered.

The working day goes on and at lunchtime you always go to XYZ sandwich bar and have a sandwich with exactly the same filling, and you always order exactly the same drink.  You bring them back to your desk and eat while carrying on with your work. Invariably you have indigestion and you don’t feel that you have had a lunch break.

At 5p.m. you set off for home and you get caught in a traffic jam again and you arrive home at 6.15p.m. feeling stressed and exhausted.  You turn on the television, start to prepare your evening meal and sit and eat it in front of the television, but you don’t really enjoy it.  The television programmes float past.  You have become a victim of your own habits.

Then comes the washing up, all the usual chores of washing or ironing.  Friday is shopping night and that is such a chore and you go around the supermarket and buy anything and everything that you perceive will make your life easier, because it doesn’t need cooking or preparing or whatever.

Then at 10p.m. you go to bed to go to sleep.  You perhaps don’t sleep well. This pattern repeats every day, every week, every month.

Weekends are taken up with housework, more washing and ironing, gardening (if you have a garden) and perhaps Sunday lunch with your parents or relatives, whether you really want to see them or not.

The next week is exactly the same, and the next, and the next and so on. This is your current reality.

All that repetition in your behaviour creates habits.  The habits feel comfortable to you and they can get far too comfortable.  They can get so comfortable that they appear to be the only safe way to proceed.  You have created a ‘safe place’, something like a really comfy armchair that hugs you all around, with some lovely comfy slippers, and your television has beautiful stars all around it because it is so warm and inviting to you.

happyladywithbook

Breaking the habit
But has it got so safe and so comfy that you become really scared to change anything?  After all, life has carried on like this for years without change, why change anything now when you are feeling so safe?  Even though you know you are not satisfied with this life of ritual and habit.

What would happen if you changed just one thing about your day?  Would the world come abruptly to an end? Would the sky fall down?  Would your friends all run away?

No, none of those things would happen.  If you were to change just one of those patterns of behaviour, your life would begin to be more interesting and less exhausting.

Don’t believe me?

Give this a try.  It is not a major change to your daily behaviour, it is a very tiny change, but it is one that will make a huge difference to you.

Every day you have gone to XYZ sandwich bar and bought the same type of sandwich and drink and taken them back to your desk and worked through your lunch.  Make the decision that today, instead, you are going to make a tiny change to your routine and go to ABC café instead.  Find a café that looks nice and welcoming to you and that you think you will feel comfortable in.  Try out a few over the next few days if you prefer until you find just the right one for you.

Then go to ABC café, by all means have the same sandwich as usual.  Buy a drink, it can be the one you usually buy.  But, instead of taking these back to your desk, stay in the café, sit and enjoy your lunch, relax, watch the people all around you.  Take your time and really enjoy your lunch.  Then take a stroll back to your office and begin your afternoon feeling rested and refreshed.

Notice the difference it makes to you and to your day.  Notice that the world has not ended.

Just one little change in your behaviour can make a huge difference to your working day.

Now your reality will look totally different.  Instead of being tired and exhausted, you will be refreshed and raring to go.  Your colleagues will notice the difference in you too.

Once you have achieved that small change, take a look at the other patterns of behaviour in your daily life.  What other small changes can you make that will make huge differences to your reality?  Could you have something different in your sandwich?

What about the time you get up and go out in the morning?  Could that be changed to make it less likely that you will catch the traffic jams?

Is there an evening class, reading group or a dance class you could join that would get you out of that comfy armchair and meeting people and helping you to enjoy your life more?

Can you change your reality so that you are really happy and doing what you want rather than what your subconscious thinks you want?

Make a note of some small changes you can make to your everyday life to change your reality.

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Your brain craves change, but it is also terrified of change and therefore it will happily let you think that by doing the same things over and over again you are safe and that doing something different is scary.

But if you were to go to a different café for your lunch what would happen?  Would the world come to an abrupt end?  No. Would XYZ sandwich bar go out of business?  No.  Would you still go to bed at night, sleep and get up the next morning?  Yes of course you would, the world wouldn’t end.  But your reality would change and you would feel so much better for it.

I am sure you can change just one or two little things and make a huge difference to your life and create a new reality for yourself.

What if you were to get up just fifteen minutes earlier and left for work just fifteen minutes earlier.  Would you miss the traffic jams?  Would you arrive at work less stressed?  Would you be able to start your day on a more positive note?  Yes you probably would.

Our primary relationship in life is with our selves. No one else goes through every experience in life with us. We are our one permanent companion, yet we are often our worst critic.

Maggie Currie

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Do you know where your beliefs and values come from?

Whether you realise it or not, you are constantly in the process of creating and changing your reality.

You are not truly aware of what someone else’s reality really looks like, and they are not truly aware of what your reality looks like. You are only aware of your own reality and how it looks to you.

Don’t believe me?  Take a simple scenario.  A road traffic accident, where nobody is hurt, fortunately, when one car hits another car.  There are three witnesses.  A policeman will ask each witness what he or she saw.  There will be three completely different perceptions of the same incident.

car

For instance, one person might state that they saw the first car brake suddenly, so the driver of the car behind (being far too close in their perception) braked really hard but the car was going too fast and ran into the car in front with a loud bang.

The second person saw the second car approaching the car in front too fast and the driver didn’t appear to even see the car in front and ran straight into it without braking.

The third person witnessed the first car slow down too much so the driver of the car behind (which wasn’t going too fast) couldn’t quite stop in time (though they tried) and hit the car in front really hard.

Three different perceptions of the same accident – each quite ‘real’ to those witnesses – but significantly dissimilar.

How you perceive your life and everything around you will differ dramatically from other people’s perceptions.  Your reality is totally unique to you.

How you think about your life, how you see yourself in the mirror, and what you believe is happening to you at any given moment, will be the reality that exists for you.

So what are your beliefs?  They are your views, judgments, guiding principles and decisions about yourself, family and friends, communities, organisations, employers and everything else you come into contact with.

Your beliefs filter everything you see, hear and feel around you and, as a result, determine the meaning you attach to any event. Your beliefs act as self-fulfilling prophecies. If you think that you can’t do something and then find it extremely difficult to do and give up trying, you have successfully fulfilled your belief that you can’t do it.

What would have happened if you had believed that you could do it?  Would your reality have been different?

Your beliefs, whether they be limiting or empowering, determine your actions, and your actions in turn verify your beliefs. Over time, as you collect more evidence to prove your beliefs, your beliefs become your reality.

Your beliefs operate in your subconscious mind and influence your conscious mind,  they affect your thoughts and behaviour. Whilst you are aware of many of your beliefs, in general, your most influential beliefs are stored away in your subconscious mind.

 

There are some beliefs you view as absolute truths and never question – that is just the way the world is! A change in your beliefs can have a major impact on how you live your life and the behaviours you manifest.

Once you believe in something, you tend to ignore opposite examples and accept only those events that reinforce that belief.

As Henry Ford, industrialist, said: ‘Whether you believe you can or believe you can’t, you are probably right.’

How right he was.

Your beliefs can have a significant effect on your life, particularly your health.

To quote Ian McDermott and Joseph O’Connor, from their book NLP and Health, (Thorsons, 1996), in a typical clinical situation, about thirty-five percent of all cases receive as much pain relief from a placebo as from morphine – simply because the recipients believe it will work.’

That is a very interesting observation isn’t it?  The subconscious mind believed it had been given a strong painkiller, and therefore the pain was relieved.  This happened because the subconscious mind cannot tell the difference between the truth and anything else it is told.

But what about your beliefs?  How can you verify them?

Well, many hundreds of years ago people were told, and believed, that the world was flat. Today there are probably still some people who continue to believe this. It is easy to see how this belief was once so prevalent.  Just look at the ground beneath your feet – it’s flat.  In the distance you may be able to see a few hills and valleys, but these are just ripples on an otherwise flat surface. All of the land is surrounded by water and it seems quite logical to have once believed that if you sailed far enough you would eventually fall off the edge of the world. Those who set off to sail the seas and never returned were testament to this.  Obviously those who did return, just hadn’t sailed far enough!

flat world

You will have noticed how this belief proved its own validity. Therefore that reality was true.

The flat-world belief was very useful in explaining and predicting phenomena in a very small area when there were no satellites, there was no television and there were no news broadcasts and no other means of communication other than verbal messages passed from one individual to another. More importantly, it made the people in that localised area feel comfortable and safe in this reality.  However, by discouraging wider exploration, it was also a very limiting belief.

But you can challenge this belief and put your life ‘at risk’. You can let go of the limiting belief of a flat world and explore other possibilities.  You can entertain new and more expansive beliefs, which other people may view as equally limiting or indeed as impossible. All these beliefs are equally valid.

Do you currently have beliefs that keep your reality comfortable and safe and that prevent you from exploring your true potential?  Do you choose to acknowledge only the reality that is predicted by your limiting beliefs and then use these observations as proof that your current reality is indeed true?

Is it time to step out of your comfort zone and set sail into the unknown?  To push the boundaries of what you think you know and discover new lands and opportunities – to challenge yourself to create your new reality?

Does that sound like something you would like to experience? I work with clients face-t0-face, on the phone and via Skype.  The choice is yours. You have everything to gain and nothing to lose. Contact me today for a free chat on how we can start moving you from a place that is not so great in your life to a place of enjoyment.

 

Maggie Currie

Email: hello@maggiecurrie.co.uk

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Are you really conscious of your thoughts?

You are constantly barraged, from the minute you open your eyes and ears in the morning until the minute you close your eyes and ears at night, with information – facts and figures, fiction, half-truths, music, news, stories, half-heard conversations, pictures and images. This information comes from parents, siblings, relatives, newspapers, magazines, school, college, university, colleagues, television, radio, advertising posters, books, magazines, films, fellow passengers, articles – the list is endless.  And this has been happening since the day you were born.

You would be surprised at how much information you absorb each week.

To prove just how much information you absorb each week and from how many sources, make a list of all the publications you read, the television programmes you regularly watch, the newspapers you subscribe to, the radio broadcasts you listen to and so on.

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Are you surprised at the length of your list?

How much of that information that you have listed do you think is having a positive effect on your life? Make a note in your notebook.

How much do you think is having a negative effect on your life? Again, make a note.

I bet the second list is far longer than the first. 

You filter all the information you receive (whether you realise it or not) and you think you either store it away for future use (you believe it) or discard it as useless (you choose not to believe it).  But, unbeknown to you, your subconscious mind will store all the information away, just in case, whether, in your conscious mind, you think you believe it or not.  Your subconscious mind has remembered everything you have ever seen or heard since the minute you were born.  Your subconscious mind has very kindly done this for you without you even knowing.

Think about it, you see a poster flash by you and the information on that poster is absorbed into your mind in an instant.   You may not even have realised that the information has been registered.  So what you believe today could be entirely based on something you read on that poster this morning.  Alternatively your beliefs could be based on something that is hidden deep down in your subconscious mind that you thought you had forgotten about, but in actual fact it has been lurking there for many years, thanks to your subconscious mind.

Still don’t believe me? 

Well let’s take an example – it is possible that when you started infant school you could have been told by your very first teacher, when you were just five years old, that you would find it difficult to keep up with your school work because, at the grand old age of five, you couldn’t sit still for more than ten minutes, and therefore you were perceived as not paying attention.  Although we all know that it is possible for you to have been walking around and still listening to the teacher.  That teacher labelled you, at that very young age, as non-attentive.  Now this belief has been stored away in your subconscious mind for many years, whether you realise it or not, and it is quite possible that, because of this stored information, you did find it difficult to keep up. You were told it, you believed it and you made it a reality.

But what if that teacher had known that because you were only five years old it was entirely possible that you could listen as well as fidget, and that teacher had never made the negative comment in the first place?  Your subconscious mind would not have been able to store that information away for many years because it would have been totally unaware.  Would you have even thought that you couldn’t keep up with the school work?  And would it have become a reality?  I think not.

What if you had been told by that same teacher, when you were the grand old age of five, that you were very talented and that you would have absolutely no trouble at all learning?  Would your reality have been different?

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Yes it would!  You would have found it easy to keep up with your schoolwork because you believed that you were talented and had no trouble learning and therefore your reality would have been totally different.

So whether you like to believe it or not, your subconscious mind rules your reality.

What a thought!

Maggie’s note:  I was told when I was at school, at the ripe old age of eleven, that I was average and would never be clever and that I would be better off going to a comprehensive school rather than a high school, as I probably wouldn’t be able to keep up with the work.  I was sent to a private school, all girls, because my parents didn’t want me to go to a comprehensive school (what would the neighbours think?) and left at age 16 with excellent exam passes in commerce, typewriting, shorthand, office arithmetic, accounts, office practice and English.  I started work as a shorthand typist with a large insurance company in London and within four years was a personal secretary for a department head and supervisor of the typing pool.  I wasn’t average at all, but my teachers had assessed me as average. 

Does this resonate with you? What are your experiences where you have been labelled?

Maggie Currie

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Finding my emotions and feelings

A few years ago I was working my way through a relationship programme and my fabulous coach, Heather Williams, and I  discovered I had a block.

We discovered I couldn’t express my emotions or feel my feelings in a way that I felt is right for me. Having been brought up from a very early age to not show anger and not allowed to show emotions it had become a habit which was now time to break. As a child I was also told that I should be seen and not heard. I was working on unblocking my emotions and feeling my feelings.

My coach had given me an exercise to do to work on one emotion at a time and I began with fear. Here is the exercise that I was given:

Draw a doorway with the door ajar. Behind the door is your emotions. Imagine standing with your hand on the doorknob about to push or pull it right open.

What emotion would come flying out first? Write down one emotion you want to work on.

Imagine what you feel. Go back to a time when you felt that emotion. How it affects the body and mind, heart – feel it physically. Try and get in touch with the emotions and feelings. Write about what happens.

door

 This is what I wrote about this experience.

The first emotion would be fear – fear of what is behind the door.

How does fear feel to me?
I remember being about 8 years old. I had been to a party for a school friend’s birthday. I had been taken to the party by my mum in the daylight. I know it wasn’t far from home, about 15 minutes by foot. The party was over and one of the parents collecting their child had a car and they said they would take me home. It was dark by now. I had never been allowed out of my street on my own, and I had no sense of direction. The person driving the car looked at me and asked me where I lived and I told her the address. She started the car and we drove around for a little while, about 5 minutes I suppose, she then asked me where the road was that I lived in, were we near it? I had no idea whatsoever as it was dark, I was small and could barely see out of the window of the car. She said I must know where I lived and where my road was. I was petrified that I would never get home and that she would think that I was stupid.

I wasn’t stupid, it was just that I had no idea where home was and how to get to it. I remember starting to shake and shiver, and tears came into my eyes. I probably looked like a scared rabbit. Her child was in the car too and she was laughing at how I couldn’t find my own house. They didn’t realise that I had not be allowed out by myself anywhere and had no notion of how to get home.

I remember being frightened and embarrassed at the same time. We eventually got home and my mum said thank you to whoever it was driving and they explained that I didn’t know the way and then everyone was told that I had no sense of direction and therefore I couldn’t be let out on my own. So apparently it was my fault or so I thought at the time.

So fear to me is sweaty palms, more rapid breathing, sometimes shaking and frequently the feeling that I need to wee, even though I know I don’t. I begin to feel unsure of myself and that just increases the fear and those symptoms just increase.

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Heather Williams

 After doing this and sending it by email to my coach we had a long chat about it via Skype – I am in UK and she was in Australia. So it was 7am BST and 4pm in Australia. Heather commented that she was pleased that I had written about the effects of the fear and that she felt I had connected well with my fears and emotions.

This was a huge breakthrough for me. Thank you to my coach and thank you relationship programme. I am feeling my feelings and unblocking and expressing my emotions and and improving my relationship with me.

 

Maggie Currie 

 

The SELF workshop – the aftermath

The SELF workshop went very well. There were around 26 people in the room and all seemed to learn something, whether that was about themselves, their situation or their future plans.

I had some wonderful feedback too and will share this with you. I asked people to write on a post it note at the end of the workshop what they felt about it, and to stick it on the door as they left.  All comments were positive which is very gratifying for me as I had put a lot of work into this workshop.

The atmosphere was relaxed and friendly.  I got to chat with every single one who came along, and after a little while they really began to get into it and were coming up with answers and experiences.

feedback

As we worked through the workbook, there were a few people who started to realise that they hadn’t been thinking about what they needed in life, they had been too busy pleasing other people. We talked a lot about energy, emotional energy spent on worrying, stressing etc.  And we found ways that we could reduce this.

We also talked about life and how although we exist, we shouldn’t just exist we should live our lives with vigour.

feedback1

 

We talked about freedom and giving ourselves permission to  live our lives as we want for ourselves.  There was a general feeling that often we didn’t allow ourselves to be who we are because we can hide behind a persona in some way or another, whether that be the role we have at work or how we think we are perceived.

And then we created vision boards of how we want our lives to look and what goals we want to achieve.  They were excellent with some people knowing exactly what they want, and some not quite so sure.

feedback2

All in all a good time was had by everyone, including myself.  Some of the attendees shared their vision boards and explained what it meant to them, others wanted to keep theirs private.

I am looking forward to the next one now with even more excitement.

If you would like to attend one of my workshops, or would like to coach with me, get in touch today.

Maggie Currie

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