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Cause and Effect

How do you live your life?  Do you live it at cause – or do you live it at effect?  And what does that mean for you?

Take two people going for interviews for a job, both have all the right credentials and experience for the role.  One of them approaches their interview from the perspective that it’s completely down to their performance as to whether they get the job or not.  They will choose how to present and project themselves and they will take 100% responsibility for their result.  They feel pretty confident and in control.

The other person is approaching their interview differently – from the perspective that they’ll do the best they can, but ultimately it’s down to the interviewer’s opinion of them and the other candidates’ performance against theirs.  They feel they have little control over the outcome, which makes them pretty nervous, and they believe that interview situations never bring out the best in them, so why should this one be any different?

Which one is more likely to be successful?  In my experience that would be the first person.  A clear example of being ‘at cause’.

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We know that a cause is something that makes something else happen.  So when we’re talking about living at cause, it’s all about causing things to happen, making choices, taking action and full responsibility.  Notice the position of power this puts you in  .

On the other side of the equation, an effect is what happens because of the cause.  So living on the effect side means having things happen to us, living with excuses and reasons why something couldn’t be, the choice and responsibility is ‘taken’ out of our hands.  It’s a feeling of powerlessness and of being the victim, in many cases.

Think about people you know at each side of the equation.  Firstly those people around you who know that if they want to do something, they will do it.  They make their decision, they choose their approach and they keep going until they achieve what they wanted.  If something isn’t working, they find another way and make it work, taking full responsibility for their goal and whatever happens on the way.  They choose to have their result.

Think about people you know on the effect side.  In situations where they want something, but see themselves at the whim of others as to whether they get it.  Setbacks are almost expected and they allow them to be setbacks.  Everything is down to outside influences, they blame others and feel powerless.  They end up with a bunch of excuses and not their result.

The interesting thing is that people on either side of the equation, whether at cause or effect, will each walk away patting themselves on the back.  Why?  Well, of course, the ‘at cause’ group chose to have their result and they got it.  While for the ‘at effect’ people it was completely out of their hands right from the start.  They found  a reason (excuse?) why they couldn’t have their result and walked away saying “see, I knew it wouldn’t work”.  Either way they were right.

Your life does not resemble anybody else's

So the question to you really should be – not which side do you live at, but which side do you want to live at?  Cause or effect?  The key point here is that at any given moment, you have the choice. You either allow what’s happening to affect you and hold on to your excuses.  Or you take full responsibility for what is going on and choose to get your result.  I know which I choose!

Try this… put yourself back at Cause!

Want to know the one question that can pull you out of that powerless feeling of being ‘at effect’?

How have I chosen to create this right now?

It’s that simple.  In any situation, if you can stop, ask that question of yourself and accept that no matter how much you want to answer it with “well, actually, I didn’t create this”… you did. If you can accept 100% responsibility for what’s going on, you put yourself at cause and you immediately grant yourself the power to change it.

The next chance you get, try this.  I would love to know what result you get.

Maggie Currie

maggieheart
Transformational Coach, Consultant
Founder of MAGGIE CURRIE COACHING

Website:       http://www.maggiecurrie.co.uk

Facebook:    https://www.facebook.com/maggielifecoach/

Email:            hello@maggiecurrie.co.uk

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Disrespect

I am shocked at the amount of disrespect there is for people of all ages by those who are deemed ‘professionals’.

My eyes were opened to several incidents of disrespect when I was in a public waiting area awaiting being collected to go to a meeting.

The first incident went as follows: 

A teenage boy was waiting for the ‘professional’ he had an appointment with to arrive.  He waited for almost twenty minutes before she arrived.  No apologies. She just said ‘We’ve got a meeting, let’s find a room’.  Then spent several minutes trying to find somewhere for this meeting to occur.

The second incident went as follows:

Three teenage girls came to the waiting area.  One of them had an appointment with a ‘professional’.  The three girls were all clean, tidy, well dressed and had obviously made the effort to get to the appointment on time.  The ‘professional’ hadn’t arrived yet they were told.  Several times the receptionist was asked if the ‘professional’ had arrived yet, and each time they were told no.

Eventually the ‘professional’ arrived.  No apologies for being late.  Same as before trying to find a room, going up and down a corridor.

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This to me is total disrespect for the teenagers who have made the effort to get to their appointments on time.  They are ready for the meetings, but the ‘professionals’ appear to have no respect for the young people.

There are many people who say that young people have no respect for their elders. In some cases this is true, but if they are treated in this fashion then why would they have any respect?  Obviously the ‘professionals’ concerned have no respect for themselves, their work or the young people or they would be there, on time, ready to go and to do their very best for these young people.

Incident three went like this:

I was waiting to go to a meeting I had been invited to which was due to start at 10am.  I arrived early and waited.  The receptionist rang whoever was in charge of the meeting to let them know I was there.  I waited for over twenty minutes and then told the receptionist that I was going since nobody had collected me and I was disappointed with the way I was being ignored.

I received an email from the notetaker of the meeting later on in the day informing me that I wasn’t on the list of people to attend the meeting, despite having been invited to the meeting.

Again, I feel there is disrespect at play here.  It seems that as I am not regarded as a ‘professional’ I am not worthy of being included their meeting.

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Incident four went like this:

A group of ‘professionals’ were waiting to go to a meeting.  One ‘professional’ was more concerned that she had to be back at her work by 11am.  One ‘professional’ proclaimed that she was merely ticking boxes.  Such ‘professionalism’ shows a total disrespect for the subject of the meeting, whoever that was, for their own standards of ‘professionalism’ and for society as a whole.

All these incidents occurred within a very short space of time.  I am totally shocked that in this day and age people behave in this way.  There is no need to be so disrespectful of yourself, your job and the people you are there to help.  If you don’t like the job you are doing then why are you doing it?  Find something you do like doing and do it to the best of your ability.

I love my work. I am passionate about helping people to live the very best lives they can and work very hard to achieve that.  I work in a professional way and when I say I will be somewhere at a particular time, I am there, usually a few minutes before that time.

To be dismissive and not even apologise for being late is unacceptable behaviour. There will probably be the usual excuses of the traffic was bad, the bus was late, the dog escaped etc. That is blaming everyone and everything for your lateness, when in fact the only person who is responsible for you being late is you.  You are responsible for every aspect of your life, not anyone else.  If you are late it is because you didn’t allow enough time to get there. It is your responsibility to there, to be ready and to do your best for your clients. Being professional doesn’t just refer to your qualifications, it refers to your whole life.

If this resonates with you,  get in touch with me today. I would like to hear from you.

Maggie Currie

maggieheart
Transformational Coach, Consultant
Founder of MAGGIE CURRIE COACHING

Website:       http://www.maggiecurrie.co.uk

Facebook:    https://www.facebook.com/maggielifecoach/

Email:            hello@maggiecurrie.co.uk

 

 

 

 

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How to have a stress free Christmas

We all know that Christmas can be stressful.  There is the usual invasion by the family, and extended family, the standing on ceremony all day, the extra expense as well as time and frustration trying to get the Christmas dinner on the table on time.

So much to do – presents to buy, cards to write, people to see, meals to cook, worrying about money.  Panic sets in.  Then there is the worry that there are not enough hours in the week.

Perhaps you perceive that you organise everything all on your own, without appreciation, and you also perceive there is a whole lot of expectation too from those around you.  That doesn’t sound like much fun to me.  And yet it is a scenario that is described over and over again.

Is it really the case though?  Do YOU have to organise everything? Are YOU expected to do it all? Is this something YOU think you ought to do?

If you think it is something you ought to do, think again.  There are no oughts allowed. We aren’t living in the nineteenth or even the twentieth century now, we are living in the twenty first century – it is time for YOU to start looking at what it is YOU want to happen at Christmas, when YOU want it to happen, who YOU want to celebrate with, who YOU don’t want to celebrate with, whether YOU want to celebrate it at all, whether YOU want to cook a roast dinner with all the trimmings or not, whether YOU want to go to a restaurant for Christmas dinner and so on.

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Perhaps you wonder what others will think of you if you break with tradition.  Stop wondering, be true to yourself, if the traditions are still relevant to you then by all means carry on with them, but if they are not relevant then stop following them.

Ask yourself how much of your planning for Christmas is led by guilt.  Be honest and try to weed out unnecessary obligations to lessen your load.

For instance, is it the norm for your relatives to all come to your house for Christmas dinner?  Do they expect you to invite them? Do you do all the food shopping, all the cooking?

Is this what YOU and they really want?  Have you had ‘the conversation’ regarding who really wants to do what on Christmas day?  It really isn’t a difficult conversation to have.

For instance, I asked my mother a couple of years ago if she wanted to spend Christmas with me or with my brother as she usually divided her time between us.  She said she would rather go on a tinsel and turkey trip with her friend and that is what she did.  She had fun, I wasn’t obligated and I could do what I wanted which was have a quiet Christmas at home with my husband.

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I know someone who went every weekend for five years to his father’s for Sunday lunch.  He packed up his car with his children and his wife and took the ferry to the mainland because he perceived this is what was expected of him.  He was beginning to resent these trips, which took up most of the day, and resent his father.

I asked him if he had had ‘the conversation’ with his father about having Sunday lunch with him every week.  He said no, but that he would.  He came back to me a few weeks later and said that his father was hugely relieved as he was getting fed up cooking a roast dinner each week, sometimes he just wanted to sit down with a sandwich, a glass of beer and watch the rugby.  They agreed to have lunch together once a month.  He got most of his Sundays back and he could do more things with his wife and children.

So do the same thing about Christmas.  Ask your relatives if they actually want to come to you this Christmas.  Don’t be surprised if they are relieved that you have asked.  You will probably find that you will have an easier time, with far less stress, with just as much fun, but fun that you want to have and not fun that is manufactured out of guilt.

What do YOU want for your Christmas? How do YOU want to look on Christmas day, worn our and resentful, or relaxed and enjoying yourself?

Festive Woman in Red Santa Hat

Budget for what you can afford to spend and stick to it.  Try and spread the cost of present shopping over a longer period. Consider a simpler version of Christmas dinner such as a buffet where everyone you choose to invite brings a plate of food.  Consider whether you are prepared to tolerate family tensions over Christmas, if not make the decision to have ‘the conversation’ with everyone concerned.

Remember, be the result of your decisions not of circumstances.

If this resonates with you, and you would like to learn more about my work,  get in touch with me today. I would like to hear from you.

Maggie Currie

maggieheart
Transformational Coach, Consultant
Founder of MAGGIE CURRIE COACHING

Website:       http://www.maggiecurrie.co.uk

Facebook:    https://www.facebook.com/maggielifecoach/

Email:            hello@maggiecurrie.co.uk

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Impacting lives

A year ago I verbalised that I intended to impact the lives of a million people and help them to become the authentic people that they are. Help them to rebuild their confidence in themselves and their abilities and become functioning human beings again. The functioning human beings they were before they forgot how to function.

I was inspired by both my daughter’s journey through leaving an abusive marriage, staying in a refuge and making a new life and home for herself and her children.  Plus I was inspired by the work of a High Chief in Malawi who has annulled all the marriages of young girls and is getting them back into education.
Since that time I have written a comprehensive six module course, talked to domestic abuse services, safeguarding teams, ladies who have escaped from abusive relationships, gentlemen who have been homeless, have been addicts and are now on the road to recovery.
In January 2017, having applied for and been granted Lottery funding as Break the Cycle Community Interest Company  we are running two courses in Havant for ladies who have escaped from abusive relationships and one course here on the Isle of Wight for ladies who have been in abusive relationships.

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It is definitely a start, and I will reach that one million target, maybe not next year, but it will happen.

If this resonates with you, and you would like to learn more about my work,  get in touch with me today. I would like to hear from you.

Maggie Currie

maggieheart
Transformational Coach, Consultant
Founder of MAGGIE CURRIE COACHING

Website:       http://www.maggiecurrie.co.uk

Facebook:    https://www.facebook.com/maggielifecoach/

Email:            hello@maggiecurrie.co.uk

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What I have learned from business coaches

Over the past past four years or so I have worked with several business coaches.  Each one is extremely successful in their field and each one has taught me something.  Interestingly, what I have learned from them is exactly the same.

Each of these coaches, entrepreneurs, business people, has come from a different background, and some have come from different continents.  They are all considered to be ‘gurus’ and are highly acclaimed.  I have no reason to doubt this or their abilities. They are all very nice people too, I have met with each of them, spent time with each of them and admire their work and tenacity.

I have attended their retreats, their seminars and listened to them all intently.  I have even qualified as one of their coaches.

graduated

But, what have I learned from each and every one of them? I have learned they are very good at running their own businesses and creating their own wealth. I have learned that I don’t want to run my business in the ways they have been telling me to.

According to them each retreat, seminar, training, coaching session is a lead in to a more expensive programme or elite group.

I went down the route of offering free workshops and from these offering paid for coaching etc.  This didn’t sit well with me so I stopped doing these, even though I had great attendance and everyone enjoyed them and learned something.  And so did I.

This is not what I want to do.

So what do I want to do?

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I want to work with people to help them regain their self-esteem and confidence so they can lead their lives as their authentic selves, rather than live their lives as others want them to. I want to work with people who have hit rock bottom and are now wanting to move upwards in their lives. I want to work with people who want to re-build their self-worth.

I thought long and hard about this and decided what I needed to do. I have obtained a grant from the Lottery to work with women who have escaped abusive relationships.  I have written a course, Mind the Gap, which is made up of six modules. I have met with the Southern Domestic Abuse Service and met some of their ladies who have been through the amazing Freedom Programme but who are now looking to move forward in their lives. And I am going to be running the very first pilot programme in January 2017.  I have 30 ladies signed up, the venue is booked in Havant, the creche facilities organised.

This is so exciting and feels right to me.  There is no sign up to a more costly follow on course.  The Mind the Gap is free to the attendees, who are all very excited to be included.

A programme will be starting in January 2017 here on the Isle of Wight too for women who have escaped from domestic abuse.  I want to work with men too who have escaped from domestic abuse and that is a work in progress.

I have also obtained funding from Island Roads Foundation to work with the homeless people, and those who have been homeless, here on the Isle of Wight.  And that will be beginning in early 2017 too.

I shall be applying for more funding to be able to work with more people both on the Isle of Wight and on the mainland.

That is what I have learned.  I don’t want to work in the ways that they work.  I want to work in the way that I work.  And that is a huge lesson and doesn’t make them wrong, but makes me more able to sleep at night and to know I am really helping people.

If this resonates with you, and you would like to learn more about my work,  get in touch with me today. I would like to hear from you.

Maggie Currie

maggieheart
Transformational Coach, Consultant
Founder of MAGGIE CURRIE COACHING

Website:       http://www.maggiecurrie.co.uk

Facebook:    https://www.facebook.com/maggielifecoach/

Email:            hello@maggiecurrie.co.uk

 

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Are all ‘conferences’ the same?

I remember going to my very first ‘conference’.  It was marketed as a Coach’s super conference where I would learn from a plethera of ‘world famous’ coaches and come away with lots of useful information.  I would learn a whole host of stuff. The cost was minimal for the actual conference, something in the region of £70 for a weekend, as the organiser was doing it to be philanthropic.  It was being held near an international airport in an hotel.  I decided I would go and booked my hotel room, and set off to learn something new.

I was sorely disappointed.  The very first presenter was Paul McKenna.  He spoke for two hours, gave everyone a free copy of his latest book.  He was extremely interesting and didn’t sell a thing.

After this the ‘conference’ went downhill rapidly.  Every speaker that followed on that first day was selling their product.  Whether it was a coaching course, a weekend of inspiration culminating in a fire walk, how to be a tv star etc.  Not only that, there was the pressing of the urgency buttons because the audience were invited to run to the back of the room to sign up now as there were only 9, 8, 7, 6 places left and so on.

emotionalwoman

And these products were priced in the hundreds or thousands of pounds.  Plus, if you signed up today, you could get the whole ‘conference’ on video to keep forever for only £xxxx.

I did meet some lovely people in the audience, some of whom were as disappointed as I was.

I stayed the night in the hotel, which was lovely by the way.  After breakfast the ‘conference’ continued.  By the first coffee break in the morning I had had enough.  I couldn’t take any more blatant selling.  So I left.  I went home. I vowed never to go to one of these ‘conferences’ ever again.  I did learn something at that ‘conference’, not to go to another one and not to do the same thing myself.

Of course, there are many ways these selling shows are created. They are billed as one day workshops, or weekend retreats. The main aim of these is to upsell, even though you do learn something about yourself whilst you are there.

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And, of course, once you have bought into the upsell, and you have moved on to whatever course, product it is, there is always another, more expensive course or product to buy.

So, are all ‘conferences’ the same.  No, there are genuine conferences where you learn stuff that is useful to you and where you are not asked to buy something else much more expensive. But do beware, as I learned the hard way, that not all conferences are what they are advertised to be.  And, if it looks too good to be true, that is probably right, it is too good to be true.

If this resonates with you, and you have had a similar experience,  get in touch with me today and tell me about it. I will be really interested to hear about your experiences.

Maggie Currie

maggieheart
Transformational Coach, Consultant
Founder of MAGGIE CURRIE COACHING

Website:       http://www.maggiecurrie.co.uk

Facebook:    https://www.facebook.com/maggielifecoach/

Email:            hello@maggiecurrie.co.uk

 

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Do you always need to defend yourself?

Living with people who are verbally abusive or verbally aggressive can be very demanding on your time and energy.  But does it have to be that way?

The abusive or aggressive person often wants you to defend yourself or explain yourself.  This is abusive behaviour, controlling, demeaning and only you can decide if you are willing to tolerate it.  Some people have tolerated this behaviour for many decades, probably because they are scared of what other people might say or think, scared about what would happen if they stood up to the bully, and even scared of what life would be like if they were to leave and begin a new life for themselves.

There is a lovely quote from Sophia Dembling “If you can plant yourself on solid ground in your head and heart, other people won’t be able to throw you off balance.  No need to debate or justify your stance.  Explain yourself if you want, bu you needn’t defend yourself.”

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The bully is usually sweetness and light when anyone else is around, but when there is nobody else there they can be constantly verbally abusive and aggressive.  This is typical behaviour from a bully who, if confronted, will usually back down because they are usually cowards too.  They want control of you and this is the only way they know how.  And because they have got away with it for years, and because you think you can’t do anything about it, they will continue in the same way.

So, what can you do about this verbally abusive and aggressive person?  You have several options available to you.  You can put up with it, you can ignore it (not so easy I know), you can try and persuade the bully to go to counselling with you or you can decide you are not going to tolerate it any longer and leave the relationship.

The excuses will roll around your head one after the other – They won’t be able to cope without me, what will I do on my own, what if…………?

Dealing with emotional abuse

But you have to decide what is best for you, and only you.  It is your life and you deserve to be able to live it in your way without the constant abuse and aggressiveness.  The abuser has chosen their path and they are happy to be on it as they are in control of you and they know exactly what they are doing to make you unhappy and make you believe that if you were to leave them that this would happen or that would happen, and they will come out with a large range of scenarios.  All of these scenarios will sound plausible, because that is what they are good at.  Making you feel inadequate.

So it is up to you to decide what you want to do.  Do you want to stay and be constantly verbally abused and spoken to aggressively?  If not, seek some professional help so you can make an informed decision about your life.

Are you ready to make changes? Work with me and learn to live life from the inside out gain more freedom, more fun and less stress.

You will discover how your mind only works one way – from the inside out.  Your life will be more productive, enjoyable and fulfilling.

Here is a lovely testimonial from one of my clients: ‘Maggie intuitively knew that the path I was on wasn’t the way I truly wanted to go. She allowed me to see that my passions were elsewhere and opened my mind to the possibilities ahead of me. I changed my path and have never looked back. Maggie was totally right.’ – MV, UK

So get in touch with me today.

Maggie Currie

maggieheart
Transformational Coach, Consultant
Founder of MAGGIE CURRIE COACHING

Website:       http://www.maggiecurrie.co.uk

Facebook:    https://www.facebook.com/maggielifecoach/

Email:            hello@maggiecurrie.co.uk

 

 

 

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Have you ‘neglected’ YOU over the summer?

Are you ready to get things back on track?

There has never been a better time to get serious about YOU! You probably think that you would like some help re-focusing.

Work with me…………….. Let’s get ready to do this!

I am offering YOU 3 coaching sessions for the bargain price of £247 (usually £1500).

Now the children are back at school, college or university the hours in the day open up for YOU again, and now is a fantastic time of year to concentrate on your needs.

Working with me you will:

• Learn to live life from the inside out
• Gain more freedom, more fun and less stress

If you do nothing but hope your life will change, it won’t. Be certain your life will change when you work with me.

Now is the time to begin focusing on YOU again.

Scoop up the golden courage dust in both hands and take the plunge.

golden courage dust

Get in touch today to have a chat about how we can work together to re-focus you and reverse that ‘neglect’.

I am offering YOU 3 coaching sessions for the bargain price of £247 (usually £1500). So grab a bargain whilst you can!  Offer ends 31st October 2016.

Maggie Currie

maggieheart
Transformational Coach, Consultant
Founder of MAGGIE CURRIE COACHING

Website:       http://www.maggiecurrie.co.uk

Facebook:    https://www.facebook.com/maggielifecoach/

Email:            hello@maggiecurrie.co.uk

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How do I know I have low self-esteem?

Low self-esteem manifests itself in a variety of ways, and I should know I have been there.  For me the following was very true:

  • I didn’t think I was good enough.
  • I thought everyone else thought they were good enough.
  • I didn’t look after myself, I put others first.
  • I let people manipulate me.
  • I was in a bad relationship.
  • I felt sad and thought there must be more to life than this.
  • I constantly asked other people for their opinion, I didn’t think I knew anything.
  • I was verbally and emotionally abused and never felt I was worthy.

I started out with the intention of being happy when I got married at age 19, but soon discovered that the marriage was not working as I was constantly treated like an idiot, not allowed to develop as me, told I was worthless and became a possession.  This situation went on for 12 years and my self-esteem nose-dived.  Whilst in that relationship I had no idea that it wasn’t normal, I thought every marriage was the same.

Dealing with emotional abuse

I woke up one morning and a thought crept into my mind.  This is not normal, there has to be something different.  I summoned the courage to seek some help and explained my situation to a solicitor and he confirmed it was not normal. I decided there and then I had to get out of that relationship.

Getting out of that relationship led me to become a single parent, living in a small flat with three small children, no money, no job, no prospects and I felt there was no hope.  My self-esteem went down even further.

Something had to change, and there was one day that sticks in my mind when things began to change.  I had the flu and the children all had chicken pox.  We were sitting huddled in the living room trying to keep warm and I had only one coin left for the electric meter.  Something had to change and very soon or none of us were going to get through this.

I phoned my parents and asked them to bring me some 50p pieces for the meter.  This didn’t change anything immediately, but it did help us to get better.  I resolved that I could get a job, I was capable and I was going to change mine and my children’s lives.

The very next week I went out and got a job cooking school meals in the school my children attended.  It meant I was there when they went to school and when they came home. I was there in the school holidays.  But it also meant I was independent, no longer reliant on benefits and other people.  I was changing my life.

Does anything resonate with you yet? Can you see the likenesses in your life at the moment? Well I can assure you, there is hope.

It took me a while, some years, but I found the answers to rebuilding my self-esteem and my life to such an extent that I run two successful businesses that I set up and I am a published author. I married again and have been very happily married for 32 years to a wonderful man who loves me.  I have spent over a decade as a life coach and mentor and work with people who have no self-esteem and help them to re-build it and I love every minute of it. I know how it feels, I know it hurts and that’s why I can help so many people.  I am still learning, life is a school and I attend every day.

Dealing with emotional abuse

 

So what can you do right now to begin to change your situation and start to re-build your self-esteem?

  • Stop thinking that you are not good enough. You most definitely are.
  • Begin to look after yourself, put yourself first. It is not selfish – it is essential.
  • Before you think that you don’t have the answer stop, really think about the question, the answer is there, you just have to find it deep down inside yourself.
  • There is more to life than you have now, it is out there waiting for you. What is it that you want? Picture it in your head, write it down, look for it , open your mind to it.
  • Listen to your intuition. Really listen. It is telling you what is right for you now in this moment.

By changing your attitude towards yourself other people will change their attitudes towards you, it will take time, but it will happen.

Begin today to change your life. You deserve to be happy and to be yourself. You deserve to have high self-esteem.

If you would like to find out more about living in the moment and rebuilding your self-esteem,  get in touch and let’s have a conversation.

Maggie Currie

maggieheart
Transformational Coach, Consultant
Founder of MAGGIE CURRIE COACHING

Website:       http://www.maggiecurrie.co.uk

Facebook:    https://www.facebook.com/maggielifecoach/

Email:            hello@maggiecurrie.co.uk

 

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Stress – what is it?

Have you set yourself goals that you think you want to achieve?  If so, are they actually achievable?  And more importantly are they really necessary?

There is stress around setting goals.  You make them mean something about your worth and value and this creates pressure as you strive to achieve them.  And if you do achieve them, will there still be something missing?

screaming

So, let’s imagine you want to test out how stressed you are.

If you feel you have to make it happen you are putting a huge responsibility on your shoulders.  You think you are on your own.  You work hard at gaining more knowledge, you work harder and keep a very tight control.  You make it all about your personal commitment and discipline.  You want to prove yourself to yourself, and to everyone else, or you think you will lose everything.

We force ourselves out of our comfort zones feeling stress and fear all the way along.

On the other hand, you could leave it all up to the Universe.  This mean you sit and wait for the conditions of your environment or in your mind to be perfect………  This is very unlikely to happen.  So you feel stressed whilst you wait.

Happy young woman with a white background

Alternatively, and more sensibly you can use your free will and make decisions from your innate wisdom and stay on course when have stressful thinking.  It is your thoughts that cause the stress, since stress itself does not exist until we create it.

So relax into what it is you want to achieve, live in the moment.  Don’t think about the future as it hasn’t happened yet.  Don’t think about what you did in the past, nothing can change that. Do what you feel is right in the moment and your stress levels will reduce and you may even find that you have no need to set goals at all.

If you would like to find out more about living in the moment and reducing your stress levels,  get in touch and let’s have a conversation.

Maggie Currie

maggieheart
Transformational Coach, Consultant
Founder of MAGGIE CURRIE COACHING

Website:       http://www.maggiecurrie.co.uk

Facebook:    https://www.facebook.com/maggielifecoach/

Email:            hello@maggiecurrie.co.uk