February 16, 2015 by Maggie Currie

Give yourself permission to simply be

I have discovered that frequently the elation that we feel when we have learned an important lesson, achieved a goal, or had a huge breakthrough can be met with a period of downtime afterward. During this time of transition, we may feel unsure and not know where to turn next, we may have feelings of lack of self worth and self doubt.

I know that during this period of downtime, we may begin to wonder what our life is about, what our purpose is, will life get better? These feelings are very common and we all feel them from time to time. If this resonates with you, just remember you are not alone.

Often, we feel best when we are working on a project or vigorously pursuing a goal. We are engaged in the process of achieving, planning, doing. But there is nothing inherently wrong with spending a day, a week or even a month, simply existing and not having a plan. Just being. This time is just as valuable and helps to rebuild our stocks of energy, ideas etc.

I know that I have found sometimes the quiet lull between ideas, projects, and goals can make life appear empty. I know there are some people who, after accomplishing one objective, want to move immediately on to the next.

However, we are all different. When you find that your next step is unclear, it is quite natural to feel frustrated, or disconnected or even a mild depression.

To help calm what can be distressing thoughts, learn to accept that you will continue to grow as an individual whether you are striving for a specific objective or not. Just be. Use all the time you need to think about what you have recently gone through and leisurely contemplate what you wish to do next.

You may also find that in simply being and going through the motions of everyday life, you reconnect with your priorities in a very organic, unforced way.

I have found that this transition time is different all the time. It can be a period of reflection or a period of adjustment where new values based on recent changes can be integrated.

Just because you have temporarily lost sight of a final destination, doesn’t mean you should assume that you have lost your drive. Where you are going next will become apparent at the right time for you.

I would love to hear from you about your experiences of simply being. Get in touch today.

Maggie Currie

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January 15, 2015 by Maggie Currie

Maggie Currie in the hot seat

In this latest blog post, Maggie speaks to writer and presenter Clancy Walker. They chat about life, loves and many challenges along the way…

Maggie, you say that your life changed almost overnight when you made the decision to change your thinking. What is your life like now?

I am now living my dream on the beautiful Isle of Wight. I am doing the work I love and living in a place that I love, with the man that I love.

It sounds wonderful, and it’s something that others can aspire to, but it hasn’t always been plain sailing for you, has it? How did life start out for you?

I was born and brought up in Essex. When I was born, I was labelled as illegitimate because my birth mother was barely sixteen when I was born, she wasn’t married and had put me in a children’s home.

Whether this was her choice or one that was forced upon her I don’t know and probably never will know. But that is where I was.

So, not the easiest of starts and I’m sure others will be able to relate to you. What happened from there?

I was fortunate enough to be adopted, rather than staying in care long term, and was taken to my prospective parents’ home when I was about six weeks old to meet my new older brother. I was fostered until the official adoption came when I was around two years of age, although I really don’t remember it.

My childhood, on reflection, was a fairly good one. We always had a two-week

holiday, usually on the Isle of Wight, which is why I grew to love it so much.

I was sent to a private school because my parents thought I would do better there than at the local comprehensive school. I did really well and left school at the age of 16 with a GCE in Commerce and a string of RSAs in shorthand, typing etc. My first job was with an insurance company in London.

I then got married for the first time when I was 19 and had three lovely children.

It all sounds great, although I notice you said ‘for the first time’ when you talk about getting married. I’m guessing things changed in your relationship?

Yes, unfortunately the marriage did not last due to the verbal, psychological and financial abuse I suffered at the hands of my husband.

I finally woke up to the fact that this was not normal and summoned up the courage to consult a solicitor who agreed with me and I filed for divorce.

It took two years for the divorce to go through, as my husband refused to accept the marriage was over, but eventually, after me standing my ground, we were divorced when I was 30.

So, you were 30 with three children to support – did you have much support from those around you?

For various reasons I had to take the children, who were aged then nine and six (I had twins), to another town and live in a one bedroom flat.

Thankfully it had a garden and was close to the schools and shops and we lived there for about two years along with a menagerie of two cats, a dog, two rabbits, some goldfish, a hamster, two gerbils and some zebra finches.

It sounds quite tough, and hectic, but it also sounds like you were starting to find your feet and enjoying the challenges life was throwing you?

Yes, I think I had got used to being on my own with the kids – and was enjoying a freedom I’d not experienced before – thanks to being free of an abusive relationship. I’m so pleased I was able to find the courage to leave it.

And then something even more wonderful happened, didn’t it?

Yes, I met up with a man called Kelvin again. I had known him for some years as a friend of my brother, and we fell in love.

We married when I was 32 and we moved to a lovely Victorian terraced house with four bedrooms and a long garden in the same town.

We lived in that house for about 15 years, so the children grew up there, and we were very happy there.

It just shows how much life can change over the years, doesn’t it? You did have some very difficult times too, though, didn’t you?

Yes, and like many people we had family challenges that we thought were impossible to solve and would never end.

At times like those we had to be patient and weather the storm. On those days it seemed that life was too much to bear. Some very hard decisions had to be made – decisions that no parents should have to make – but we made them and life carried on.

How did you manage to make such difficult decisions?

We made the decisions that we thought were the best at that time and would be the most beneficial for the whole family.

But life does get better and that cloud does go away especially by thinking good thoughts and getting back on track and by not feeling guilty or giving in to emotional blackmail, which is something I can help others with through my coaching.

So, what happened after the children had grown up?

When the children had all left home we moved to Hampshire, where we lived for

about five years. We had also bought a flat on the Isle of Wight and we took holidays in it and spent lots of weekends in it. We planned to retire into it as well, as we loved the island so much.

While we were living in Hampshire our next-door neighbour was Maureen – who was looking forward to retiring at 60.

Sadly Maureen was diagnosed with cancer and died six months later, before she got to her sixtieth birthday.

We made the decision then to move to the Isle of Wight and not wait until we retired. A step we have never once regretted.

Which leads us back to where we started in this interview! Tell me a little more about what life is like for you now, Maggie?

Moving to the Island has opened up so many doors that would not have been opened if we had stayed where we were.

I have opened my mind to the new opportunities that are available and I have kept my mind open to make sure that I don’t miss any.

I have found that following the signs, even if I am not sure where they are leading me, can be really beneficial.

Some opportunities I reject, some I embrace. I have made mistakes, learned from them and moved on.

But life isn’t perfect for everyone all of the time – how have you handled the difficult times in recent years?

There have been times when life has not been so good. Like when my father died suddenly in 1999. I miss him still. He was a fountain of knowledge and wisdom and always had time and wise words for me.

I have learned how to bounce back and gain something from the experiences I have been through to make sure I don’t make the same mistakes again. I really believe you can do the same if you are gentle with yourself.

Thanks Maggie, what advice would you like to finish with for your readers?

I know my coaching, books, talks and courses will help you to change your life for the better.

Don’t forget to open your mind to the new opportunities that lie ahead of you.

The choice is yours, you have the ability to create your very own future. Your new life is out there. Go and open the door to your new, fantastic future.

Good luck on your motorway of life, take the right exits for you, try some you think might not be quite right, you may be surprised.

Be brave. You deserve to succeed.

Love

Maggie xx

Maggie Currie

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Maggie Currie was speaking to writer and presenter Clancy Walker

January 5, 2015 by Maggie Currie

Have you lost your identity?

Have you lost your identity? This may seem a ridiculous question to ask, but frequently we can forget who we really are. For instance it is often the case that you think of yourself, or other people think of you, as someone’s parent or partner, someone’s sibling or relative, someone’s carer or employee, someone’s companion or employer, someone’s nurse or gardener. The list can be endless. It is possible that frequently you are not seen as yourself but as an extension of someone else.

This very common state is generally brought about because your self-esteem has dropped to an all time low and ultimately you have lost what little confidence you had. You may not be aware of this lack of self-esteem initially as you have been viewed in this light for so long that you have got used to it. It has become your norm.

I know exactly how that feels. I was brought up by my adoptive parents to be who they thought I ought to be. I was frequently told as a child that I should be seen and not heard, and that I had no opinion of any value. This led to me go through life in a daze, trying to be who I thought I ought to be.

I spent thirty years of my life looking after everyone else’s needs and forgot all about my own needs and what made me happy. The one very special person I neglected was me!

Did I change this situation? When I woke up to the fact that this was not the norm – you bet I did, and it took some very hard work, beginning with changing how I thought about myself and my life.

Is there a solution for you too? Yes there is. And the action you need to take is this:

Break the old habits and thinking patterns that have prevented you from living your life to the full and realizing your potential.
Create new habits, new patterns, new beliefs that will empower you and set you free!
Accept and love yourself just as you are. This is the key to your ‘inner life’ makeover; and ultimately ‘outer life’ results will follow naturally! When you begin to feel great on the inside you will begin to exude confidence. Your circumstances will begin to change and develop as the inner happy you begins to shine out!
Listen to your intuition. It is there to help and protect you.
Be kinder to yourself – verbally, emotionally and physically.

I know how it feels to really want to make changes in your life, and not knowing where to start. My fears dominated me, my self-belief was in shreds and I had forgotten what makes me happy because I hadn’t been happy for so long, although I hadn’t realized it until I ‘woke up’. I had become a shadow of who I really was.

With the help of life coaching I began to change the way that I see myself and began to think strong positive thoughts about my life. I started to be grateful for the life I am living and to notice the abundance that surrounds me. Everything started to change for the better.

Learning to love yourself is tough to begin with, but with help and practice each day, you will succeed.

If you need help and are ready to start breaking those old habits, contact me today.

Maggie Currie

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September 30, 2014 by Maggie Currie

Finding my emotions and feelings

A few years ago I was working my way through a relationship programme and my fabulous coach, Heather Williams, and I discovered I had a block.

We discovered I couldn’t express my emotions or feel my feelings in a way that I felt is right for me. Having been brought up from a very early age to not show anger and not allowed to show emotions it had become a habit which was now time to break. As a child I was also told that I should be seen and not heard. I was working on unblocking my emotions and feeling my feelings.

My coach had given me an exercise to do to work on one emotion at a time and I began with fear. Here is the exercise that I was given:

Draw a doorway with the door ajar. Behind the door is your emotions. Imagine standing with your hand on the doorknob about to push or pull it right open.

What emotion would come flying out first? Write down one emotion you want to work on.

Imagine what you feel. Go back to a time when you felt that emotion. How it affects the body and mind, heart – feel it physically. Try and get in touch with the emotions and feelings. Write about what happens.

This is what I wrote about this experience.

The first emotion would be fear – fear of what is behind the door.

How does fear feel to me?
I remember being about 8 years old. I had been to a party for a school friend’s birthday. I had been taken to the party by my mum in the daylight. I know it wasn’t far from home, about 15 minutes by foot. The party was over and one of the parents collecting their child had a car and they said they would take me home. It was dark by now. I had never been allowed out of my street on my own, and I had no sense of direction. The person driving the car looked at me and asked me where I lived and I told her the address. She started the car and we drove around for a little while, about 5 minutes I suppose, she then asked me where the road was that I lived in, were we near it? I had no idea whatsoever as it was dark, I was small and could barely see out of the window of the car. She said I must know where I lived and where my road was. I was petrified that I would never get home and that she would think that I was stupid.

I wasn’t stupid, it was just that I had no idea where home was and how to get to it. I remember starting to shake and shiver, and tears came into my eyes. I probably looked like a scared rabbit. Her child was in the car too and she was laughing at how I couldn’t find my own house. They didn’t realise that I had not be allowed out by myself anywhere and had no notion of how to get home.

I remember being frightened and embarrassed at the same time. We eventually got home and my mum said thank you to whoever it was driving and they explained that I didn’t know the way and then everyone was told that I had no sense of direction and therefore I couldn’t be let out on my own. So apparently it was my fault or so I thought at the time.

So fear to me is sweaty palms, more rapid breathing, sometimes shaking and frequently the feeling that I need to wee, even though I know I don’t. I begin to feel unsure of myself and that just increases the fear and those symptoms just increase.

Heather Williams

After doing this and sending it by email to my coach we had a long chat about it via Skype – I am in UK and she was in Australia. So it was 7am BST and 4pm in Australia. Heather commented that she was pleased that I had written about the effects of the fear and that she felt I had connected well with my fears and emotions.

This was a huge breakthrough for me. Thank you to my coach and thank you relationship programme. I am feeling my feelings and unblocking and expressing my emotions and and improving my relationship with me.

Maggie Currie

Maggie Currie Coaching

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May 27, 2014 by Maggie Currie

Can life coaching help me sort out my life?

Yes, I believe that it will help you sort out your life. Coaching draws out rather than puts in. I find it is reactive, flexible and enabling. My coaching style is non-judgemental, helps people to develop and grow in a variety of areas.

My approach to coaching is to get the very best out of someone and giving them the confidence to make decisions that will improve their life.

When my clients experience being coached, their motivation comes from working with me who is an upbeat, positive role model. I want my clients to reach their full potential and when they do it gives me tremendous job satisfaction. Helping clients discover where they want to go and then helping them to get there is so rewarding to me.

What makes me a great coach?

I like people and want to bring out the best in them
I want my clients to do something more fulfilling in their lives
I enjoy personal and financial freedom
I have natural ‘people’ skills.

Interestingly, a great deal of the life coaching and personal coaching I do is carried out on the telephone. Some of my clients I have never actually met in person. For several reasons coaching is just as effective over the telephone as it is face-to-face. In fact, many of my clients prefer to speak over the telephone. It is very convenient for both myself and my client, and it offers greater flexibility since we all have busy lifestyles. Coaching over the telephone offers other obvious advantages:

coaching can be conducted wherever I and my client happen to be – anywhere in the world
there’s no travelling time or travel cost involved
I don’t need offices, meeting rooms, staff or other expensive overheads

Having said that, I enjoy face-to-face coaching too, as I love the personal contact and appreciate the one-to-one feel of the coaching session. I meet my clients at a mutually agreeable venue, a quiet corner of a café, in their client’s home or office, in my home or office or wherever is convenient.

My coaching sessions are typically sixty minutes, though sometimes longer.

Some of the things I practice in my coaching:

Listening to what has been said, and what hasn’t been said
What motivates people must be understood
Everyone is capable of achieving more
Finding solutions not creating more problems
A person’s past is no indication of their future
People’s beliefs about what is possible for themselves are their only limits
I always provide full support
I can’t provide the answers, but I can draw them out of my clients
I never criticise my clients
All my coaching is completely confidential
Some people’s needs cannot be met by coaching, and I recognise clients with these needs and refer them to a specialty that will help them

So, to answer the original question “Can Life Coaching help you sort your life out?” Yes, I believe it can. Life coaching is what you make it. If you wish to set and achieve goals, accept yourself and become everything you are capable of becoming then working with a Life Coach is for you.

I also offer a money back guarantee. If you don’t change something about your life when coaching with me, I will give you your money back.

Contact me today to have a free chat on how my coaching will help you to sort out your life.

Maggie Currie

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January 29, 2014 by Maggie Currie

Taking time for YOU!

My clients often tell me that one of the added benefits of coaching with me, that they hadn’t considered before they started, is that their hour and a half session can often be the only time in a busy week that they feel able to step back and truly focus 100% on themselves. Hand on heart, how often could you say that you allow yourself to do that?

A lot of the time we get so busy ‘doing’ that we forget about ‘being’.

This was a revelation of sorts for me some years back. I had something fantastically inspiring to aim for, I had the focus and drive to work really hard and I was making good progress. And yet, I wound up feeling ill, stressed and fairly disillusioned. If this was what having stretching goals was about, I wasn’t sure I wanted them after all!

Talking through how I felt with a friend one day, I was brought up short when she said “oh yes, you’ve become a human doing instead of a human being” and I thought about that all the way home.

As I reflected on the previous few months I could think of few times when I wasn’t ‘doing’ and even fewer times when I’d consciously decided to take time out and just be.

So, how much of your time do you spend ‘doing’ and how much do you spend ‘being’? If you had to divide a circle up with how much time you give over to each? What would it look like? How big would your ‘being’ slice be?

With our busy lives and time-poor society it can seem impossible to take more time for ourselves, but at what cost do you choose not to? My decision those few years back was to invest more time in myself, and I’m certain that I’m much more productive as a result. I get more done in my ‘doing’ time now than I ever did when I was ‘doing’ every waking second of the day. Plus, my ultimate decision was that it couldn’t all be about the doing and the destination or I’d miss the journey altogether.

So what time could you make for yourself to just be? When could you next set aside an hour or two, a whole day or even more than that to relax and recharge? How much better would you feel if you did?

Could you do with some regular time set aside to focus 100% on you and on making your life how you want it? Have you got so lost in the process of life, that you have forgotten who you are?

I can help you with focusing on you and learning to be. Contact me today and we can have a chat on how it will work.

Maggie Currie

Creedence – Confidence for You

I am helping people to become the very best version of themselves so that they can have more fun, live a better life and enjoy their work.

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December 25, 2013 by Maggie Currie

Looking at your values

Our values are often inherited from our parents, and they inherited them from their parents. But are they relevant to us now? There are many reasons why values change, sometimes they just don’t fit right.

I admire people for different reasons. for instance:

Rafael Nadal for his focus, hard work, talent.
Oprah because she is self-made, courageous, giving.
Mother Teresa for being selfless, courageous, honest, generous.
My dad (no longer with us) because he was true to himself, honest, kind, generous, loving.
My husband for being caring, loving, generous, selfless, hard working.

There are some values that appear in several of those people and my values incorporate all of those and of course others. For instance one of my values is to be consistent in my life, whether it be working, relaxing or whatever.

Values will always changes as we progress through life. We will meet more people who we admire and perhaps some of the people we currently admire will change their values, and we won’t agree with them.

Values change as our circumstances change, i.e. going through divorce and in the aftermath. Now we have to focus on ourselves and not on making a marriage work.

I like to keep an open mind and check in with myself every so often to make sure I keep my values true to me.

Are there any values you have now that are not fitting right? Check in with yourself to make sure your values are true to you.

Get in touch today and we can have a free informal chat on how I can help you to take action and rediscover your values.

Maggie Currie

Creedence – Confidence for You

I am helping people to become the very best version of themselves.

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October 27, 2013 by Maggie Currie

Trusting your intuition

Your intuition often called your gut feelings get their name from the place in the body where they make themselves known. A pang in your gut when you may be doing the wrong thing, or a vibrant zing when your body approves of what you are doing, can guide you reliably at times when logic fails. Sometimes, when logic takes over, we ignore our intuition and probably live to regret it. We discover later that a rational approach is only one way of determining what is going on in a situation and how we should react.

Your gut resides in the solar plexus just above your belly button. When it is functioning well, you can trust its guidance and adjust your actions accordingly. So many of us have a tendency to hold in this area of our bodies. We take shallow breaths that never reach this part. But it is in this place that we find the courage to act, to reach out into the world and create change. When our gut is out of balance, we are timid and out of sync, wishing we had been able to say something although we were only able to say it later when we were alone; wishing we had acted on the opportunity we hadn’t seen until it was past.

Most of us have probably experienced a sense of knowing things before we know them, even though we probably can’t explain how. Maybe you hesitated at a green light and missed getting hit by a speeding car. Possibly you decide on a whim to break your no-blind-dates policy and meet your life partner. Those ‘insights’ can be tapped into when you learn to recognise the signals. It could be sweaty palms, a funny feeling in your stomach or even an unexplained certainty that something is not right.

According to Judith Orloff PhD, a Los Angeles based intuitive psychiatrist and author or Second Sight (Three Rivers Press, 2010) there are five gut feelings that are advisable to pay attention to:

1. Something feels wrong in my body. It could be you feel drained by an energy-draining person. Move away from them.

2. I am in danger. You can tell within the first 10 seconds of meeting someone if they are friend or foe.

3. I want help. Following your instincts for sympathy and generosity generally turns out to be a good investment in your health and happiness.

4. I know how to do this. Sometimes your can-do instinct developed through years of experience is drowned out by an onslaught of overthinking and your ‘forget’ how to do something.

5. This is it. Your intuition signals that you’ve found something or someone truly right for you.

In order to get the most out of your gut feelings, you may want to focus your attention on it more regularly and make the time to care for it. You can begin right now by taking a deep breath into your belly. When you exhale, pull your navel in toward your spine so as to empty out completely before taking another deep breath into your belly. When you empty completely, you release any stagnant energy and create more space to be filled with the fresh, nourishing breath. The more you practice this simple, cleansing exercise, the clearer and more communicative your gut feelings will be and the more comfortable you will feel acting on them.

I am helping people to become the very best version of themselves and would love to work with you. Contact me today.

Maggie Currie

Creedence – Confidence for You

International Confidence Coach, Motivational Speaker, Author

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September 4, 2013 by Maggie Currie

Looking beyond appearances

It is natural to judge people, and yourself, since it just happens without us even thinking about it. We take one look and in 2 seconds summarise our opinion of a whole person – overweight, pretty, stylish, sloppy. This habit comes from the brain’s need to categorise the world in order to be able to function without becoming overwhelmed.

Judging is your way of identifying relevant information, you are trying to decide if the person approaching is a threat, a friend or someone you don’t need to worry about. This way of looking at people makes sense in a dangerous context, but in your daily life it can lead to an overly simplistic reading of the people you meet.

If you have ever judged someone dismissively, only to have them become a good friend once you really got to know them, then you will understand the hazards of the judgement cycle. An experience like that may lead you to question your natural tendency to believe your first impressions.

You will always notice things about the different people you meet, but as you become more conscious of the idiosyncrasies of judgement, you won’t be satisfied with your surface observations. You may notice that someone is driving an expensive car, but you will decide whether to befriend them based on getting to know them over time. You will not rule out a friendship with someone with unruly hair, especially if they turn out to have a great sense of humour and a kind heart. Liking or disliking a person is a choice you will naturally make, but it will be after you have got to know them.

Next time you notice yourself judging somebody, stop. Try to radiate love to that person. Then listen to them openly or look them in the eye and learn more about them. If this is not easy for you, remember not to judge yourself either. Trust that, with practice, you will change your habitual judgemental patterns. And as you do, you will find a whole new dimension of perception opening up to you, allowing you to see beyond the surface and into the essence of people you meet.

If you need help with any of the above, please contact me.

I am helping people to become the very best version of themselves and would love to work with you.

I have some availability for new coaching clients, we just need to fix some dates for when you want to get started. Get in touch today.

Maggie Currie

Creedence – Confidence for You

International Confidence Coach, Motivational Speaker, Author

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July 9, 2013 by Maggie Currie

How you can get the most out of your coaching sessions

Coaching is the key to transforming your life.It begins with helping you to understand where you are now and to obtain clarity about what you would like to achieve and how you will achieve it. I then work with you to create and execute a plan of action to move you forward and transform your life. You’ll be educated, entertained and inspired to take action immediately, and I promise you’ll find clear, logical, easy-to-implement ideas – most of which will make a difference to your life straight away. Remember, You can’t go back and make a new beginning, but you can start today to make a new ending.

Do you have a dream? I am sure you do. Become really passionate about it, enthuse to others about it, create a picture in your mind of what your dream will look like when you make it happen. Make the picture as bright and colourful as you can. Add sounds, smells – whatever you feel makes the picture complete.

Begin to do as many things as you can to bring that picture you have in your mind into form. You don’t need to change everything in your life to achieve it – just take baby steps towards it…gently…slowly.

In the words of Robert Heinlein “In the absence of clearly defined goals, we become strangely loyal to performing daily trivia and ultimately become enslaved by it.”

You have a dream; have you set your goals to make that dream come true? Don’t let it sit in your imagination or your heart forever …trust in you… let it out…..let it come to life.

Take the opportunity to invest in yourself. This investment won’t let you down. The more things change, the more YOU can’t afford not to.

Coaching sessions are focused and forward thinking, allowing you to get the results you need quickly and enjoyably and ensuring you get great value for money.

If you are stuck at any point by fear of the unknown, I can help with various techniques, such as NLP and TFT, to rid you of the anxiety associated with fears, life traumas etc., and thus help you to move forward with your life.

I have worked with a vast range of clients, male and female, young and old, each with their own unique lifestyles and challenges. I am proud to be able to say that every one of them has benefited from my coaching. Many of them have made massive changes to their lives, such as changing careers, moving to another part of the country and starting a new life, ending a relationship that wasn’t working, improving their home/work balance.

Don’t be one of the 90% of people who will look back with regret, knowing their lives could have been different. Take this golden opportunity to be fulfilled and live the dream. Have what you want, do what you want and be the person you have always wanted to be.

Every single one of us is capable of achieving truly amazing things, but you have to choose. Are you going to be one of the 10% or one of the 90%?

It is time now for you to take action and to really begin to change your life. I am helping people to become the very best version of themselves and would love to work with you.

I have some availability for new coaching clients, we just need to fix some dates for when you want to get started. Get in touch today.

Maggie Currie

Creedence – Confidence for You

International Confidence Coach, Motivational Speaker, Author

Maggie Currie

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