Making Life Work for You

Sometimes we have so many responsibilities in our lives, ranging from work obligations to caring for children to running a household, we feel we cannot possibly make it all work. We may feel overwhelmed in the face of it all, ending each day feeling hopelessly behind schedule. However, regardless of how frustrating this can be, these are the parameters that make up our lives, and we owe it to ourselves to find a way to make it work. Rather than buckling under the pressure of an impossible to-do list, take a moment to view the larger perspective.

to do list
Like the CEO of a large organisation, we must first realise that we can’t do every job ourselves. The first step to sanity is learning how to delegate some of the responsibility to other people, whether by paying someone to clean our house or trading childcare duties with another parent. In addition, we might find places where we can shift our expectations in ways that make our lives easier. For example, expecting ourselves to create a healthy home-cooked meal every night after a full day of work, errands, or caring for an infant or toddler may be a bit excessive. We might allow ourselves to get take away food once in a while without any guilt. Accepting the adjustments needed to make our lives work is an essential ingredient to being at peace with our situation.

At the end of the day, we must come to terms with changing what we can and accepting what we can’t change. Allow your innate thinking to guide you. Sometimes the laundry piles up, a sick child demands more of our attention than usual, and we temporarily get behind with our schedule. Accepting this momentary state of affairs and trusting in our ability to get back on track when the time is right, we gracefully accept our life as it is, letting go of perfectionism and embracing life as it stands.

If anything resonates with you in this article, I will be delighted to hear from you, and of course be happy to help you.

I offer coaching and mentoring to you – for you to make the changes you want to in your life. To help you to have more fun, more freedom and less stress. That is it. There is no catch. I believe in you.

Maggie Currie

maggieheart

Professional Transformational Coach, Consultant
Founder of MAGGIE CURRIE COACHING

Website:       http://www.maggiecurrie.co.uk

Facebook:    https://www.facebook.com/maggielifecoach/

Email:            hello@maggiecurrie.co.uk

The future is in your imagination

I was reading a post that a friend created on Facebook.  I am going to call her Anne. It went something along the lines of she had to travel to London on the train tomorrow and there will be a strike.  She made up this scenario of thousands of people trying to cram themselves onto a train to get into London.  Anne thought she would be late for a meeting.  She was worrying that she would be late and so the thoughts went on.

Anne was thinking about the future, and the future hasn’t happened yet.  It is in our imaginations.  It isn’t reality.  Just the like the past – it was our reality once, but not any longer.  The only reality we have is now in this moment.  The future isn’t our reality because it hasn’t happened yet.

Stressed Businesswoman

So today, in her actual reality, Anne has found that the train she got on was fairly empty, she got a seat and she got to London on time for her meeting.  This is Anne’s reality now.

All that worrying Anne did about whether she would be late, be squashed on a train made her anxious in the moment.  That was her reality.  Anxious thinking.  Anne’s imagination had created this whole scenario and she believed it.

We have somewhere in the region of 80,000 thoughts a day.  Some of them we are totally unaware of, these thoughts are the ones that keep us alive.  We don’t consciously think breathe in, breathe out thousands of times a day. We don’t consciously think about driving when we drive.  Those thoughts are in our subconscious and run in the background.

The thoughts we are aware of in our conscious mind are the ones that flit in and out of our heads.  Some of them we catch and some of them pass through with little or no notice.

We don’t have to believe all the thoughts that appear in our mind.  We can recognise them and discard them, we can recognise and believe them.  But we don’t have to believe them all, especially the ones that are about future events and how bad or good they are going to be. The future is in our imaginations.

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Do you want clarity about your current situation, about what really matters in life, the choices you want to make and who you really are?

Are you ready to make changes? Working with me and learning to live life from the inside out will bring you more freedom, more fun and less stress.

You will discover how your mind only works one way – from the inside out.  Your life will be more productive, enjoyable and fulfilling.

So get in touch with me and we can get a date in the diary for an initial chat.

Maggie Currie

maggieheart
Transformational Coach, Consultant
Founder of MAGGIE CURRIE COACHING

Website:       http://www.maggiecurrie.co.uk

Facebook:    https://www.facebook.com/maggielifecoach/

Email:            hello@maggiecurrie.co.uk

Fast forward a year

Have some thoughts about how would you like to see yourself in a year’s time?  Do you see yourself exactly the same as you are now, or with some slight changes or perhaps with a whole new feel and look?

Your life does not resemble anybody else's

In a year’s time I see for me:

  • My relationship with myself looks pretty good at the moment. I treat myself with respect and gratitude and have learned that I don’t have to believe all the thoughts that come into my head.
  • My thoughts are generally positive but occasionally a negative thought will creep in. This is ok and normal.  I like to live in the moment, not in the past and I know nothing about the future yet.
  • My relationship with my husband is fantastic, we love and respect each other and make each other laugh. We are best friends, lovers, companions and so much more.
  • My relationship with my mother is good, we see each other fairly regularly, my father is no longer with us but is always in my heart and mind.
  • My relationship with two of my children is virtually non-existent (their choice which I respect) and with the third is very good.
  • My physical health is pretty good, I am slightly overweight and making an effort to change this and I currently feel great.
  • My finances are reasonably okay, but could of course be a lot better. Bank account is in the black.
  • My business world consists of coaching and teaching.  I love working with people to support them through life changes. I am self-employed and an entrepreneur. I am the business.
  • I am peaceful in my life, enjoying being who I am. I don’t meditate.
  • For fun I work at pop festivals and trade by offering Indian head massage to all the punters at the festivals.

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  • I take time for myself every day, even if it is only 5 minutes.

Take a few moments to think about your future.  Is there anything you would like to see differently? What are you prepared to do to bring about those changes?

Get in touch today and let me know how you see yourself in a year’s time.

Maggie Currie

maggieheart
Transformational Coach, Consultant
Founder of MAGGIE CURRIE COACHING

Website:       http://www.maggiecurrie.co.uk

Facebook:    https://www.facebook.com/Maggie-Currie-Coaching-527886050648208/?ref=hl
Email:            hello@maggiecurrie.co.uk

 

Putting ‘You’ first

Do you remember travelling on a plane?  If you do, you have probably heard the instructions of the cabin crew reminding you to put on your own oxygen mask before helping anyone else with theirs. This advice is often told as a story for self-care because it expresses accurately why it is so important.

A woman was travelling on a plane with her twin 4 year old daughters.  The safety message clearly stated that should there be an emergency the oxygen masks would drop down.  Passengers were instructed to ensure they fitted their own masks before going to aid anyone else.

oxygen masks

There was an emergency, the oxygen masks fell.  The mother tried to fit a mask on one of her daughters, who wriggled and screamed and so she failed.  She tried to fit a mask on her other daughter with the same effect.  By the time she had unsuccessfully tried to fix their masks in place she had lost consciousness.  They too lost consciousness.  Sadly they all died.

This is why it is so important to look after you first.  To put your metaphorical oxygen mask on first.  So that if there are problems with helping others, you are still alive to keep on helping.

There are very few situations in your daily life that mimic the wake-up call of a plane emergency, so it’s very easy to keep putting off self-care.  Easy, that is, until you get ill, overwhelmed or physically exhausted, and suddenly you don’t have the energy to care for the people who count on you.  That’s when you realise that you haven’t been caring for yourself. It begins to dawn on you that taking care of yourself is not selfish or indulgent; it’s just plain practical.

Putting yourself first means that it might be necessary to say no to someone else in order to say yes to yourself.  For many of you, that is the point where guilt kicks in and you feel you could or should be doing something for someone else.  Keep in mind the oxygen mask metaphor.

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You can encourage yourself by saying “I am caring for myself so that I can care for others” or any other sentence or phrase that you find encouraging.  It will also help you if you remember that self-care doesn’t have to be very time-consuming. In fact, the best prescription for taking care of yourself probably means small, daily rituals; for example, taking a half-hour for yourself at the beginning and/or end of each day to meditate or journal, think or read or just be. You may also like to transform your daily shower or bath into a half-hour self-pampering session occasionally.

Whatever you decide is right for you, making that small gesture where you put yourself first every day will pay off  hugely for you and the ones you love.

Putting yourself first is not selfish, it is vital; you just need to be reminded how important you are to you and everyone else.

Maggie Currie

maggieheart
Consultant, Coach, Author
Founder of MAGGIE CURRIE COACHING

Website:       http://www.maggiecurrie.co.uk

Facebook:    https://www.facebook.com/Maggie-Currie-Coaching-527886050648208/?ref=hl
Email:            hello@maggiecurrie.co.uk

Are you really conscious of your thoughts?

You are constantly barraged, from the minute you open your eyes and ears in the morning until the minute you close your eyes and ears at night, with information – facts and figures, fiction, half-truths, music, news, stories, half-heard conversations, pictures and images. This information comes from parents, siblings, relatives, newspapers, magazines, school, college, university, colleagues, television, radio, advertising posters, books, magazines, films, fellow passengers, articles – the list is endless.  And this has been happening since the day you were born.

You would be surprised at how much information you absorb each week.

To prove just how much information you absorb each week and from how many sources, make a list of all the publications you read, the television programmes you regularly watch, the newspapers you subscribe to, the radio broadcasts you listen to and so on.

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Are you surprised at the length of your list?

How much of that information that you have listed do you think is having a positive effect on your life? Make a note in your notebook.

How much do you think is having a negative effect on your life? Again, make a note.

I bet the second list is far longer than the first. 

You filter all the information you receive (whether you realise it or not) and you think you either store it away for future use (you believe it) or discard it as useless (you choose not to believe it).  But, unbeknown to you, your subconscious mind will store all the information away, just in case, whether, in your conscious mind, you think you believe it or not.  Your subconscious mind has remembered everything you have ever seen or heard since the minute you were born.  Your subconscious mind has very kindly done this for you without you even knowing.

Think about it, you see a poster flash by you and the information on that poster is absorbed into your mind in an instant.   You may not even have realised that the information has been registered.  So what you believe today could be entirely based on something you read on that poster this morning.  Alternatively your beliefs could be based on something that is hidden deep down in your subconscious mind that you thought you had forgotten about, but in actual fact it has been lurking there for many years, thanks to your subconscious mind.

Still don’t believe me? 

Well let’s take an example – it is possible that when you started infant school you could have been told by your very first teacher, when you were just five years old, that you would find it difficult to keep up with your school work because, at the grand old age of five, you couldn’t sit still for more than ten minutes, and therefore you were perceived as not paying attention.  Although we all know that it is possible for you to have been walking around and still listening to the teacher.  That teacher labelled you, at that very young age, as non-attentive.  Now this belief has been stored away in your subconscious mind for many years, whether you realise it or not, and it is quite possible that, because of this stored information, you did find it difficult to keep up. You were told it, you believed it and you made it a reality.

But what if that teacher had known that because you were only five years old it was entirely possible that you could listen as well as fidget, and that teacher had never made the negative comment in the first place?  Your subconscious mind would not have been able to store that information away for many years because it would have been totally unaware.  Would you have even thought that you couldn’t keep up with the school work?  And would it have become a reality?  I think not.

What if you had been told by that same teacher, when you were the grand old age of five, that you were very talented and that you would have absolutely no trouble at all learning?  Would your reality have been different?

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Yes it would!  You would have found it easy to keep up with your schoolwork because you believed that you were talented and had no trouble learning and therefore your reality would have been totally different.

So whether you like to believe it or not, your subconscious mind rules your reality.

What a thought!

Maggie’s note:  I was told when I was at school, at the ripe old age of eleven, that I was average and would never be clever and that I would be better off going to a comprehensive school rather than a high school, as I probably wouldn’t be able to keep up with the work.  I was sent to a private school, all girls, because my parents didn’t want me to go to a comprehensive school (what would the neighbours think?) and left at age 16 with excellent exam passes in commerce, typewriting, shorthand, office arithmetic, accounts, office practice and English.  I started work as a shorthand typist with a large insurance company in London and within four years was a personal secretary for a department head and supervisor of the typing pool.  I wasn’t average at all, but my teachers had assessed me as average. 

Does this resonate with you? What are your experiences where you have been labelled?

Maggie Currie

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