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Underneath the noise – Hearing the whisper

You may have noticed that when you want to speak to someone in a noisy, crowded room, the best thing to do is lean close and whisper. Yelling in an attempt to be heard over the noise of the room generally hurts your throat and adds to the chaos.

Have you noticed that you inner voice whispers to you all the time? If we want to hear it, no matter what is going on around us, or even inside us, we can always tune in to that soft voice underneath the surrounding noise.

color closeup picture of redhead lady ear

It is generally true that voices in our heads that make us feel panicky or afraid are of questionable authority. They may be voices we associate with our childhood or from our culture, and they only speak half-truths.

The other voice that whispers reassurances that everything is fundamentally okay simply delivers its message with quiet confidence. Once we hear it, we know it speaks the truth.

We will find that our own communications in the world begin to be influenced by the quiet certainty of this voice.  As we align ourselves more with this quiet confidence, we become an extension of the whisper, penetrating the noise of the world and creating more peace, trust and confidence.

Business people communicating with each other against white

I have some availability for coaching clients, we just need to fix some dates if and when you want to get started. Get in touch today.

Maggie Currie 

Creedence – Confidence for You

International Confidence Coach, Motivational Speaker, Author

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Your confidence diary.

A great way to boost your confidence is to keep a confidence diary.  It is a smart tool to remind yourself just how good you really are and what you have to be thankful for and pleased about in your life right now.

It is something I used to rebuild my confidence after going through a toxic relationship, divorce and learning to be me again.

diary

Either buy yourself a notebook or a day to view diary and once a week for a month jot down your answers to the following confidence questions.

Don’t give me any excuses about you haven’t got the time to do it! Take just 10 minutes per week, sit down and jot down your thoughts to:

  • What have I got to be grateful for in my life right now?

  • What am I happy about in my life right now?

  • Why am I happy about these things?

  • What did I accomplish last week?

  • What am I excited about in my life right now?

  • Who do I love and appreciate in my life? Who do I like hanging around? Why?

  • Who loves and appreciates me for what I am? Warts ‘n all!

Answer these questions honestly at the start of each week and it will set you up for success.

Getting our lives back after divorce

If you need a booster midweek, then by all means answer them again whenever you want to feel centred and remind yourself of what you have got going for yourself in your life right now. You can do this whilst enjoying a nice cup of tea or coffee.

I have some availability for coaching clients, we just need to fix some dates if and when you want to get started. Get in touch today.

Maggie Currie 

Creedence – Confidence for You

International Confidence Coach, Motivational Speaker, Author

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Friends and family who sap your positive energy

The people with whom you have the most contact and who hang around you will have either a positive or negative effect on your levels of self-esteem and confidence.

We all know people who are positive, happy and joyful to be around. Have you noticed how they make you feel?

They make you feel the same as them, happy and positive! They can put zest into a boring atmosphere and can fill the room with a positive, ‘can do’ vibe that has a knock on effect onto everyone else.

Four Women Friends at the Beach

We also know of those people who could moan for England!

According to them they never had the opportunities, they are always putting people down, they don’t like other people to be successful, they are jealous and are negative thinkers – and so much more!

These people drain the energy from the room, and bring everyone down to their level, a million miles away from the level that YOU want to be operating on.

poutinggirl

Some family members can be a lot like this, but you can always choose your friends, you can never choose your family!

What can you do to make sure that the people you have most contact with empower and support what you stand for rather than bring you down all of the time?

You have the power to choose who you have contact with. Ideally you want happy, vibrant and positive people. If there are people who are constantly draining our positive energy you have a couple of options.  You can tell them how you feel and if they are really good friends they will respect your wishes and may change their behaviour. If they drift into the negative again, try to ignore it.  Or if they aren’t really good friends, they will drift away and find someone else to drain.

The same can be said for your family.  Your more mature relatives have been conditioned for many, many years and are a different generation.  Appreciate where they have come from whilst being selective with the information that filters through to your brain.  You have the same choices as with your friends for the younger relatives, tell them how you feel and they will either change something or drift away.

Don’t attach any guilt to your decisions, as it is your life and if you are tired of the negativity, it is time to do something about it.

You may well find that you make new friends who are positive and upbeat and some other members of your family may reappear who have also removed themselves from negative relatives.

I have some availability for coaching clients, we just need to fix some dates if and when you want to get started. Get in touch today.

Maggie Currie 

Creedence – Confidence for You

International Confidence Coach, Motivational Speaker, Author

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Self Awareness

When I was in my teens and even up to my early 40s I had very little self-awareness.  I plodded along doing what I was told to do, manipulated by so many people.  I was so totally not self-aware I didn’t even notice that I was living my life on other people’s terms.

It is only since I have trained to be a life coach that I have really discovered myself and discovered my own self awareness.  I have found that to be able to grow into my own self-awareness I have to understand my feelings and emotions.  This was quite a difficult journey for me, as I have suppressed feelings and emotions for many years.  The reason – I was told by my parents when I was a child that I should be seen and not heard.  I was told that I should not express anger or display any emotion.  And so I learned to repress them.

Having this understanding now after learning so much about my feelings and emotions and rediscovering who I am really am, I know that I can express my feelings and emotions. And this is a huge step for me towards self-awareness.  But what does self-awareness do for me? What are the benefits to me?  Being self-aware has given me the opportunity and freedom to change those things I want to change about myself and create the life that I want.  I now don’t allow others to manipulate me.  I live my life on my terms.  I am seen and heard and I do express my feelings and emotions.

 New for 2013. From confusion to clarity – Becoming ME again

The more clarity I get about who I am and what I want, and of course why I want it, the more I empower myself to consciously make those wants a reality. But, how do I get this clarity? I turn to the expert – ME.  I know more about myself than anyone else, I know I have been manipulated and by whom.  I know I have suppressed my feelings and emotions,  and I know why.  And I have got to know myself even better over the past few years by becoming so much more self-aware.  I am, of course, still learning.

To get the clarity I want I have learned to ask myself questions and expect specific answers. The more specific my answers, the more impact they have on my life and then I have a much clearer picture of  me.  Of course, there are times when my answer is ‘I don’t know’ and I know that is okay too.  I give myself the freedom to take a wild guess and this allows me to carry on.  What I have discovered is that I really do know more than I ever thought I did.

Honesty is vital in my answers to myself.  It will lead to my true self-awareness, but it does take a lot of courage.  It is the courage to face my fears or to face something I find difficult to accept about myself.  For instance, I know that I am impatient and want things to happen now.  I also know that when people are speaking to me I get impatient to hear the end of what they are saying, and I tend to try to finish their sentences for them.  I know this about myself and do my best to bite my tongue and not jump in with the answers.  By being totally honest with myself I take ownership of my actions, thoughts and feelings and find those beliefs that are no longer serving me. Those beliefs can then be discarded, altered or whatever feels right for me.

I find that sometimes I do slip up and give an answer that perhaps I think I should give, rather than what I really know is right.  That means I am giving answers from my head rather than getting in touch with my feelings and getting the answer there. To get out of my head again, I take several deep breaths and start to listen to my body, to notice where it is hurting and breathe into that place.  This helps me to balance myself and to find the answers I need, and they come from inside me rather than from my head.

How do I know I am in a relationship that is bad for me?

I know that whatever I discover about myself I can handle with ease and acceptance.  I trust that whatever I discover about myself will in some way lead to a greater sense of me and increased self-awareness.

I have found that practising listening to my body has enabled me to get to grips with my emotions and feelings in a way that I have never been able to do before.  And of course I am learning every day more and more about myself too.

I have some availability for coaching clients, we just need to fix some dates if and when you want to get started. Get in touch today.

Maggie Currie 

Creedence – Confidence for You

International Confidence Coach, Motivational Speaker, Author

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A grateful attitude helps in times of extreme stress

I have found that being grateful for what I do have far outweighs worrying about what I don’t have.  This philosophy works on so many levels for me and it can work for you too.

When I decided to leave my marriage of 12 years (30 years ago), I was full of worry about what I didn’t have at that time, how I would manage, how I would survive etc.  I spent so long worrying about what I didn’t have and desiring all the things that I thought I did want, that I forgot to live as me.  I forgot all about me.  And because of that I had to hit rock bottom before I realised that I could do something about my life.

At that time I didn’t know anything different.  I had never heard of self-development, nor had I heard of life coaches who could have helped me.


Now, of course, I know differently and I always put into practice my own teachings.  I am grateful every day for all that I have, the abundance in my life.  Abundance in life, such as the wonderful area I live in, the friends I have, the trust and love of my husband, the work that I do and the lovely clients who I help daily.

Had I known about how to be grateful for what I had way back then I would probably have coped a whole lot better.  I may not have hit rock bottom, I may have lived my life differently.  I shall never know now, but it doesn’t matter.  I am living the life that I love, working with people every day who benefit from my learning and teaching. I am determined that nobody should have to reach the depths that I did before they change their lives for the better.

Today I am grateful for the smallest things as well as the huge things.  I am grateful for the sunshine today, for the little flowers popping their heads over the window box, the little birds singing, the sea, the green fields and so much more.



If you are going through a life trauma, it may help you to think about all the things you can be grateful for.  The little tiny things that come in large numbers.  They may just bring a smile on a dismal day and help you get through.

I have some availability for coaching clients, we just need to fix some dates if and when you want to get started. Get in touch today.

Maggie Currie 

Creedence – Confidence for You

International Confidence Coach, Motivational Speaker, Author

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Living in the moment

I went on a road trip from the Isle of Wight to Perth in Scotland.  I left on a Monday with my husband and we drove 200 miles towing our caravan to stay overnight in a camp site in Nottingham.  The lady there was lovely and had her own little bar with real ales.  We slept there and then set off again on Tuesday for County Durham.

We drove another 200 miles and stayed for two nights in a camp site near Beamish.  The caravan site was impersonal and quite frankly money grabbing, asking for £20 deposit for the keys to the toilet block and the gate to get in and out.  We visited Beamish, the museum, on Wednesday and rode on the old trams and buses, went into the department store that sold everything you could think of, the sweet shop and the old tea rooms. It as a wonderful day out and we thoroughly enjoyed it.

caravan

On Thursday we travelled another 200 miles to Scone Palace in Perth in Scotland and spent 4 nights there at the Rewind Scotland Festival. Loads of 80s bands were playing and we were doing Indian Head Massage for the punters.  It was fun, we met some lovely people on the other trade stands and the punters of course.

On Monday we set off for home, travelled 280 miles to stay in a camp site in Lancaster.  The lady there was lovely and friendly and we slept well.

On Tuesday we had another 280 mile drive to Southampton to catch the ferry back to the Isle of Wight.

How is this all connected to living in the moment you may ask?  Well, I have deliberately enjoyed the whole trip by staying in the moment and not thinking about what is going to happen when we get back.  After all, the more we stay in the moment, the more fun we have and the less worry we have. If only I had known how to do this when I going through divorce.  My life would have been so much easier.

Happy young woman with a white background

Interestingly, last night I began to think about what was going to happen tomorrow with my work and instantly felt a tightening in my chest.  So I deliberately stopped thinking about it and the tightness faded.  I listened to my body and to my own advice.

It has worked for me and I am feeling relaxed and energised, enjoyed the journey home.  Tomorrow is another day and I will live in the moment again, and again.

I have some availability for coaching clients, we just need to fix some dates if and when you want to get started. Get in touch today.

Maggie Currie 

Creedence – Confidence for You

International Confidence Coach, Motivational Speaker, Author

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Where would I rather be?

I would rather be sitting in a deck chair with a good book, ‘Living Your Design: A Manual for Cellular Transformation (Student Manual)’ by Lynda Stone comes to mind. I don’t mind where I place the deck chair, it could be in the middle of a field, on a beach, in a clearing in a forest, in a park – but it has to be in nature. I love watching the animals and birds going about their daily business. Watching children playing happily, laughing and having fun.

deckchair

So where am I now? In my office finishing off the final bits of work that I had on my to do list, doing the last bits of washing and packing clothes and things for my road trip to Scotland that starts tomorrow.

Leaving home at around 8am to get my caravan that is stored on a farm about 10 miles away. Hitch it up to our van and then off to East Cowes to get the ferry to Southampton. Then off to Perth via County Durham and the Beamish museum and aiming to arrive in Perth on Thursday.

I have planned to meet up with an old friend just outside Leeds on Tuesday, someone I haven’t seen for 5 years, and I am really looking forward to having a cuppa and a chat with her.

The camp sites are booked for our overnight stays on the way up to Perth and then we will be at Scone Palace at the Rewind Festival from Thursday to Monday. I love the change of scenery, the change of work (we will be offering Indian Head massage to the festival goers and traders) and scenery.

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Heading back home on Monday, staying overnight in Lancashire and then home on Tuesday evening.

So back to where I would rather be. Reading a book in nature. I am going to achieve this over the next few days.

I have some availability for coaching clients, we just need to fix some dates if and when you want to get started. Get in touch today.

Maggie Currie 

Creedence – Confidence for You

International Confidence Coach, Motivational Speaker, Author

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Friends come and go for a reason

I was considering why it is that friends come into our lives and some of them go out of our lives again.

There are many reasons but for me I think that some people fall away because of the changes I have made to myself.   I have learned so much about myself that I was unaware of. For instance I have stuffed emotions and feelings down because I was conditioned not to show emotion or share feelings.

Four Women Friends at the Beach

When I was in a toxic relationship I had very few friends, and those I did have were not that close.  I wasn’t allowed to get close to anybody.  Getting divorced and learning to live my life as me has been a steep learning curve.

I have learned how to express my feelings, get close to people and keep others at arm’s length.  Now that I am able to express emotions and share my feelings other people may find this unacceptable to them. And that is okay. What I am comfortable with is not always comfortable for everyone else. And that may be why some friends have moved away.

The friends I have currently are wonderful. Some live nearby, some live on different continents, but I am grateful to them all for their friendship and support. I do my best to support all my friends, it may be in a big way or in a small way.

Dealing with emotional abuse

I am grateful for all the friends I have had, still have and those I have yet to meet for their contributions to my life.

I have some availability for coaching clients, we just need to fix some dates if and when you want to get started. Get in touch today.

Maggie Currie 

Creedence – Confidence for You

International Confidence Coach, Motivational Speaker, Author

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What makes me laugh?

I was wondering what to write and then it came to me – what makes me laugh?

The things children say that are so honest and innocent – for instance my granddaughter Abigail who is 9 years old now, was asked when she was about 18 months old to go and do something with her mother. Her reply was ‘I haven’t finished yet’. When asked by her mother what she was doing that she hadn’t finished yet, Abigail replied ‘Looking out of the window’. Now that made me laugh, because it was so cute, so innocent and so honest.

happychildren

My husband makes me laugh on occasion. Sometimes it is something he says, sometimes it something he does, it could be the way he looks.

Dogs make me laugh by the way they run around in circles trying to catch their tails, or chase leaves or each other.

Monkeys with their antics, squirrels playing with their acorns, horses trotting around their fields.

My face in the mirror first thing in the morning is hilarious.

I love to watch people and often the way they behave makes me laugh. It could be that they are tipsy and giggly, or they have a specific way of packing their shopping into their bags.

20 ways to increase your confidence after divorce

Laughing doesn’t mean I am ridiculing, it means that I am enjoying what I am seeing and feeling. I love people and animals. I find them fascinating and intriguing.

So lots of things make me laugh, sometimes inwardly and sometimes with a full on belly laugh. The latter is extremely good as I can feel my mood shifting too.

I have some availability for coaching clients, we just need to fix some dates if and when you want to get started. Get in touch today.

Maggie Currie 

Creedence – Confidence for You

International Confidence Coach, Motivational Speaker, Author

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Grounded, meditated and living!

This week has been very constructive for me and I have delved into new things that will benefit me in the long term, as well as being enjoyable whilst they are happening.

For instance, I had my first Tai Chi class this week for a very long time. I think the last class was about 5 years ago. I say class, it involved standing still for half an hour, doing an exercise for 10 minutes, warming down and then sitting on the floor drinking stewed green tea for half an hour. Not what I would call inspiring or useful. I stuck it for a few months, then gave up.

This week’s class was so totally different and I learned more in an hour and a half than I did in all the previous months. And today I am aching, so it must be doing me good.

thaichi

I learned how to ground myself and how we are all connected to the ground. I learned that I have to be in the moment to get the full benefit of Tai Chi as it is all about self-awareness and being aware of where you place your feet, hands etc. There are 4 people in the class, so we all get individual instruction and help from the tutor.

The tutor is someone I coached a few years ago because he was overwhelmed with work, travel, admin etc. He didn’t know where to turn and he was dreading getting up each day. During our one session together he came to the realisation, with my deft questioning, that he needed someone to help him with the admin side of his business. He has gone from strength to strength.

This is his testimonial to me: “Thanks for the notes and your time yesterday. The idea of getting help was a major breakthrough for me and I am laughing at myself and in total disbelief that I had to be led by you to that very obvious solution!!! I guess you must get that all the time though. Getting help will open up the possibilities of what I can achieve enormously and I actually woke up this morning raring to go instead of dreading the day’s work.”

It is so good to be appreciated and get results for my clients.  That is why I love my work and am so passionate about it.

I also began meditating today. I enjoyed it, even though it was only 10 minutes and was surprised at how effective it is. I found some meditation music that I like and it lasts for about 10 minutes. It is very conducive to meditating, something I have always wanted to learn, and now I am. The music can be found at http://www.omharmonics.com.

concept

I worked with one of  my client this week and she is learning so much about herself and how she can connect with her emotions and feelings. This is something we all need to do to ensure we are living our lives authentically. It is also something I learned going through divorce and in the aftermath.  I had lost the real me in the divorce process and it took me a long time to find me again.  This is why I love working with people because I don’t want them to ever be lost to themselves like I was.

So –  grounded, meditated and living.  A good place to be!

I have some availability for coaching clients, we just need to fix some dates if and when you want to get started. Get in touch today.

Maggie Currie 

Creedence – Confidence for You

International Confidence Coach, Motivational Speaker, Author

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