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Can Divorcees and Singles Survive Valentine’s Day?

Going through divorce often leaves you feeling that you have nobody to rely on, other than yourself. So take advantage of you and really look after yourself on this day. Turn the focus of your attention to you. Buy yourself something special, something you will really love and appreciate. It maybe something that you wouldn’t usually think of buying for yourself, but on this occasion it feels right to do it. Here are some more suggestions for you to feel special on this loving day:

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  • treat yourself to a day being pampered at the spa.

  • treat yourself to a special meal and enjoy it in the comfort of your own home. You don’t have to cook it yourself, unless you really want to, you can order it by phone and have it delivered to your door.  Use your favourite crockery, buy a bottle of wine and enjoy your chosen feast.

  • watch your favourite film or read a good book.

  • How about you and some of your best friends getting together to watch a few of the worst romantic comedy films you can find.  Have a fun evening with people you love to be with and who love to be with you.

  • Make some new resolutions, as most New Year resolutions are fading now.  Make a Valentine’s Day resolution to love yourself.  Resolve to take some evening classes or to go on that trip you have been promising yourself.  Resolve to try new restaurants or to try new recipes.  Make a resolution that you will make a start towards the dreams you know you want to achieve.

  • If you have children why not make the day special for them as well as you.  Buy some little gifts – chocolates, stuffed toys, model cars etc. – and make a present hunt game with clues, and they can fun trying to find the gifts and you will have fun watching them.

  • Organise a trip to the zoo or cinema with the children

Whatever it is you choose to do, whether it is on your own, with friends or with your children, make sure it is fun for you.

Do not:

  • Find a stranger to spend the evening with.  You will regret it in the morning and make it worse for yourself when the next Valentine’s Day comes around.
  • Watch tv programmes filled with loves stories.

  • Get all dressed up at work as your colleagues will jump to conclusions and make your life a misery all day.

  • Sit at home being miserable and feeling sorry for yourself because you don’t have someone to share this sill day with.

  • Beat yourself up for feeling miserable and lonely. Anyone who has been through, or is going through, divorce has been there and had times like these.  It is never easy. Take the time to grieve and heal.  Nobody understands divorce better than those who have been through it.

A great thing to do would be to wait until February 15th and then treat yourself to a heart-shaped box of chocolates at half price, or buy some flowers for you for half price.

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Remember, it is just one day, you have been through worse in your divorce.  It will all be over in the morning.

Plan your life around yourself and learn to really love yourself again.  This will not only be fun and interesting, but loving yourself is the basis of beginning your new life as the new, confident you.

I have some availability for coaching clients, we just need to fix some dates if and when you want to get started. Get in touch today.

Maggie Currie 

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My birthday

Yesterday was my birthday and I was surprised by my hubby who sent me flowers and they were delivered in the morning.  They are beautiful and of course much appreciated.


I had another surprise from my mum who is currently in hospital recuperating after falling and hurting her knee.  She is 89 years old and called me on her mobile phone to wish me a happy birthday.

I received loads of birthday wishes on Facebook and via email too.  I certainly felt very special.

Yet another surprise from my hubby was a half bottle of champagne to celebrate.  That went down very well!

I spent the day doing very little and just enjoying being.  I cooked a roast dinner and we had that in the evening with some more wine and liqueurs.

An evening watching a few episodes of The Good Wife on dvd finished off a lovely day.

Listening to my own advice and liking being me and enjoying being made for a great day.

I have some availability for coaching clients, we just need to fix some dates if and when you want to get started. Get in touch today.

Maggie Currie 

Creedence – Confidence for You

International Confidence Coach, Motivational Speaker, Author

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Living in the moment

I went on a road trip from the Isle of Wight to Perth in Scotland.  I left on a Monday with my husband and we drove 200 miles towing our caravan to stay overnight in a camp site in Nottingham.  The lady there was lovely and had her own little bar with real ales.  We slept there and then set off again on Tuesday for County Durham.

We drove another 200 miles and stayed for two nights in a camp site near Beamish.  The caravan site was impersonal and quite frankly money grabbing, asking for £20 deposit for the keys to the toilet block and the gate to get in and out.  We visited Beamish, the museum, on Wednesday and rode on the old trams and buses, went into the department store that sold everything you could think of, the sweet shop and the old tea rooms. It as a wonderful day out and we thoroughly enjoyed it.

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On Thursday we travelled another 200 miles to Scone Palace in Perth in Scotland and spent 4 nights there at the Rewind Scotland Festival. Loads of 80s bands were playing and we were doing Indian Head Massage for the punters.  It was fun, we met some lovely people on the other trade stands and the punters of course.

On Monday we set off for home, travelled 280 miles to stay in a camp site in Lancaster.  The lady there was lovely and friendly and we slept well.

On Tuesday we had another 280 mile drive to Southampton to catch the ferry back to the Isle of Wight.

How is this all connected to living in the moment you may ask?  Well, I have deliberately enjoyed the whole trip by staying in the moment and not thinking about what is going to happen when we get back.  After all, the more we stay in the moment, the more fun we have and the less worry we have. If only I had known how to do this when I going through divorce.  My life would have been so much easier.

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Interestingly, last night I began to think about what was going to happen tomorrow with my work and instantly felt a tightening in my chest.  So I deliberately stopped thinking about it and the tightness faded.  I listened to my body and to my own advice.

It has worked for me and I am feeling relaxed and energised, enjoyed the journey home.  Tomorrow is another day and I will live in the moment again, and again.

I have some availability for coaching clients, we just need to fix some dates if and when you want to get started. Get in touch today.

Maggie Currie 

Creedence – Confidence for You

International Confidence Coach, Motivational Speaker, Author

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Where would I rather be?

I would rather be sitting in a deck chair with a good book, ‘Living Your Design: A Manual for Cellular Transformation (Student Manual)’ by Lynda Stone comes to mind. I don’t mind where I place the deck chair, it could be in the middle of a field, on a beach, in a clearing in a forest, in a park – but it has to be in nature. I love watching the animals and birds going about their daily business. Watching children playing happily, laughing and having fun.

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So where am I now? In my office finishing off the final bits of work that I had on my to do list, doing the last bits of washing and packing clothes and things for my road trip to Scotland that starts tomorrow.

Leaving home at around 8am to get my caravan that is stored on a farm about 10 miles away. Hitch it up to our van and then off to East Cowes to get the ferry to Southampton. Then off to Perth via County Durham and the Beamish museum and aiming to arrive in Perth on Thursday.

I have planned to meet up with an old friend just outside Leeds on Tuesday, someone I haven’t seen for 5 years, and I am really looking forward to having a cuppa and a chat with her.

The camp sites are booked for our overnight stays on the way up to Perth and then we will be at Scone Palace at the Rewind Festival from Thursday to Monday. I love the change of scenery, the change of work (we will be offering Indian Head massage to the festival goers and traders) and scenery.

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Heading back home on Monday, staying overnight in Lancashire and then home on Tuesday evening.

So back to where I would rather be. Reading a book in nature. I am going to achieve this over the next few days.

I have some availability for coaching clients, we just need to fix some dates if and when you want to get started. Get in touch today.

Maggie Currie 

Creedence – Confidence for You

International Confidence Coach, Motivational Speaker, Author

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Friends come and go for a reason

I was considering why it is that friends come into our lives and some of them go out of our lives again.

There are many reasons but for me I think that some people fall away because of the changes I have made to myself.   I have learned so much about myself that I was unaware of. For instance I have stuffed emotions and feelings down because I was conditioned not to show emotion or share feelings.

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When I was in a toxic relationship I had very few friends, and those I did have were not that close.  I wasn’t allowed to get close to anybody.  Getting divorced and learning to live my life as me has been a steep learning curve.

I have learned how to express my feelings, get close to people and keep others at arm’s length.  Now that I am able to express emotions and share my feelings other people may find this unacceptable to them. And that is okay. What I am comfortable with is not always comfortable for everyone else. And that may be why some friends have moved away.

The friends I have currently are wonderful. Some live nearby, some live on different continents, but I am grateful to them all for their friendship and support. I do my best to support all my friends, it may be in a big way or in a small way.

Dealing with emotional abuse

I am grateful for all the friends I have had, still have and those I have yet to meet for their contributions to my life.

I have some availability for coaching clients, we just need to fix some dates if and when you want to get started. Get in touch today.

Maggie Currie 

Creedence – Confidence for You

International Confidence Coach, Motivational Speaker, Author

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Who do I love?

There was a time when I didn’t love myself because I didn’t feel worthy. I was in a toxic relationship that drained all emotion from me and left me a shell of the person I really was.

A grateful attitude helps in times of extreme stress

Today that is so very different. I have rejected that relationship, divorced, moved on and remarried. The situation now is so very different.

There are many people who I love, and in many different ways too.

I love my husband of 28 years, Kelvin, he is my rock, lover, friend, confidante and most of all my support through life’s ups and downs.

I love my mother for being who she is, for bringing me up to the best of her ability and for being there when I needed her.

I love my children, all 3 of them equally even though I have very little contact with my sons – their choice.

I love my 5 granddaughters and 1 grandson, all of them equally. I have met 5 of them, have never met one and, have no contact with 3 of them. The choice of their parents.

I love my friends in deed  who are always there for me to encourage, compliment, advise and listen.

New for 2013. From confusion to clarity – Becoming ME again

I love my friends who are there for me always. I don’t have to ask, they are just there. Even if I don’t see them for months at a time.

I love me for being the rock and support for my husband, for being there for my mum when she needs me, for being there for my children whether they need me or not, for being there for my grandchildren whether they need me or not and for being there for my friends in deed and my friends.

I love me for being me and for being prepared to develop even more into me, to take care of me and to continue to move forward in my life.

I have some availability for coaching clients, we just need to fix some dates if and when you want to get started. Get in touch today.

Maggie Currie 

Creedence – Confidence for You

International Confidence Coach, Motivational Speaker, Author

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Grounded, meditated and living!

This week has been very constructive for me and I have delved into new things that will benefit me in the long term, as well as being enjoyable whilst they are happening.

For instance, I had my first Tai Chi class this week for a very long time. I think the last class was about 5 years ago. I say class, it involved standing still for half an hour, doing an exercise for 10 minutes, warming down and then sitting on the floor drinking stewed green tea for half an hour. Not what I would call inspiring or useful. I stuck it for a few months, then gave up.

This week’s class was so totally different and I learned more in an hour and a half than I did in all the previous months. And today I am aching, so it must be doing me good.

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I learned how to ground myself and how we are all connected to the ground. I learned that I have to be in the moment to get the full benefit of Tai Chi as it is all about self-awareness and being aware of where you place your feet, hands etc. There are 4 people in the class, so we all get individual instruction and help from the tutor.

The tutor is someone I coached a few years ago because he was overwhelmed with work, travel, admin etc. He didn’t know where to turn and he was dreading getting up each day. During our one session together he came to the realisation, with my deft questioning, that he needed someone to help him with the admin side of his business. He has gone from strength to strength.

This is his testimonial to me: “Thanks for the notes and your time yesterday. The idea of getting help was a major breakthrough for me and I am laughing at myself and in total disbelief that I had to be led by you to that very obvious solution!!! I guess you must get that all the time though. Getting help will open up the possibilities of what I can achieve enormously and I actually woke up this morning raring to go instead of dreading the day’s work.”

It is so good to be appreciated and get results for my clients.  That is why I love my work and am so passionate about it.

I also began meditating today. I enjoyed it, even though it was only 10 minutes and was surprised at how effective it is. I found some meditation music that I like and it lasts for about 10 minutes. It is very conducive to meditating, something I have always wanted to learn, and now I am. The music can be found at http://www.omharmonics.com.

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I worked with one of  my client this week and she is learning so much about herself and how she can connect with her emotions and feelings. This is something we all need to do to ensure we are living our lives authentically. It is also something I learned going through divorce and in the aftermath.  I had lost the real me in the divorce process and it took me a long time to find me again.  This is why I love working with people because I don’t want them to ever be lost to themselves like I was.

So –  grounded, meditated and living.  A good place to be!

I have some availability for coaching clients, we just need to fix some dates if and when you want to get started. Get in touch today.

Maggie Currie 

Creedence – Confidence for You

International Confidence Coach, Motivational Speaker, Author

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Self worth

My view of my self worth has been very low recently.  I hadn’t actually realised it until today when I read the following message I received this morning from Abraham:

‘Worthiness, in very simple terms, means I have found a way to let the Energy reach me, the Energy that is natural, reach me. Worthiness, or unworthiness, is something that is pronounced upon you by you. You are the only one that can deem yourself worthy or unworthy. You are the only one who can love yourself into a state of allowing, or hate yourself in a state of disallowing. There is not something wrong with you, nor is there something wrong with one who is not loving you. You are all just, in the moment, practicing the art of not allowing, or the art of resisting.’

I was indeed practising the art of not allowing – not allowing myself to receive the abundance that I so truly deserve.  Somehow I had become blocked and was feeling that I was not at all worthy.  My skills were of no use to anyone and therefore nobody new would be coming to me for coaching.

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Fortunately, this missive from Abraham resonated with me on many levels.  It made me remember just how self destructive negative thinking can be. I know this is true, but I am just as liable to negative thoughts as anyone else, although I do endeavour to keep thinking positively as it benefits me, and my clients, so much more.

I thought about this for a little while and it came to me that I have not been giving myself the recognition that I so richly deserve.  I have been hiding my light under a bushel and that is now going to stop.  It also made me stop and think about how I felt going through divorce.  I felt even worse then, I had no self esteem or feelings or self worth.  I thought I would never be able to hold my head up again, let alone change my life.  But I did change my life and the way I see myself and it has made such a huge difference to my life.

New for 2013. From confusion to clarity – Becoming ME again

I work with fabulous coaches who love and support me, teach and coach me, learn from me and are coached by me.  I have so much to offer my current and potential clients and my passion is in coaching people to become who they really are.

With modern technology anyone in the world can access coaching via Skype, phone, instant messaging and so many other ways.

My own self worth has increased dramatically since I began writing this blog and will continue to do so, especially as I remind myself of all my successes. That doesn’t mean I have a big head, I don’t, I know my own self worth and I am proud of it. I am worthy and I shall not be wasting my time or energy on negativity any longer.

I have some availability for coaching clients, we just need to fix some dates if and when you want to get started. Get in touch today.

Maggie Currie 

Creedence – Confidence for You

International Confidence Coach, Motivational Speaker, Author

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My achievements and what I foresee for myself

I have accomplished so much that it is hard to know where to begin.  I have become a much more rounded life coach with the training and coaching I have undertaken over the years.  This has built on my already considerable expertise as a coach and has allowed me to grow so much more as a person too.

An even bigger accomplishment for me is to let go of my ego mind and have a coach (in fact lots of coaches) just for me.  In the past my ego mind has told me that I didn’t need a coach because I am already one, so what could I learn?  This accomplishment has been a revelation to me and I have learned so much from my coaches this year and grown as a person and a coach myself. My wonderful coaches have taught me that there is still so much to learn in this life and I am enjoying all the learning.

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I have accomplished coaching my fellow coaches so they have grown and spread their wings too. My expertise and advice has been invaluable to them.  I have also accomplished finding my voice and speaking up for myself so that I am heard.  I have considerable expertise and a lot to offer and I have accomplished letting people know that.

My book “What you believe creates your reality” is continuing to sell all around the world and I know that there are people who have changed their lives because they have read it and taken action.  I have accomplished some amazing life changes for people through this medium – I know that one person realised that they weren’t in the right relationship and they have ended it and moved on, another person has changed direction completely, been to NASA for 3 months and learned about what she wanted rather than what others wanted her to learn, I also know that my book has been read on five continents and been taken on cruise ships and sent to relatives and friends all around the world. That is some accomplishment.

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My book is ideal to read if you are going through divorce, life trauma, uncertainty, as it will show you how to be you and to create the life you want.

I have worked with many people as a volunteer coach and mentor through Young Enterprise, The Prince’s Trust and Mentor-Net to help them achieve their goals and aspirations.

I was hired to coach a young man who was despondent because he had no job and he had lost confidence in himself.  He is married and is a brilliant web designer and computer techy.  I coached him for just one session and a few months later asked him for an update.  He told me that he felt so much more confident in himself and was getting out there in the employment market again.  I was told this week that he had got a job, not just any job! He is now working for Apple.  That is some achievement for him and for me.

I am currently the resident coach at Community Action Isle of Wight and help people to regain their confidence so they can get back to work.  I am loving this.

I am also the resident coach on an internationally networked radio programme entitled Calder’s Confessions.  This is quite a challenge but I am loving it.

I shall continue to coach and be coached and to grow even more as a person and help them to grow too. This is a magical year.

Where do you see yourself? Are you having difficulty getting through a life trauma, divorce etc.?

I have some availability for coaching clients, we just need to fix some dates if and when you want to get started. Get in touch today.

Maggie Currie 

Creedence – Confidence for You

International Confidence Coach, Motivational Speaker, Author

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The proper nourishment for my body

I recently spent 5 days working at a festival, starting at 8am and finishing around 9pm, little time for nourishment for me. I enjoyed meeting all the clients and was really pleased that I could relieve their headaches, release the tension in their shoulders and so much more with the head massages I provided.

Of course this left very little time for eating properly. Breakfast was a bowl of cereal and some toast. Mid morning brought biscuits or crisps, lunchtime was sausage rolls and pork pies or a bacon sandwich. In the evening we did manage to cook a ‘proper’ meal like pasta or meat pie, potatoes and vegetables, but were too tired to really enjoy it.

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At the time the days just whizzed by and I didn’t pay much attention to my feelings or what was happening to my body. I just got on with the work and loved it all. When I returned home, however, this was a different matter entirely. I felt sluggish, had a few spots, needed a couple of days of normal food to get my body and myself back on track.

I felt physically drained and tired, I felt mentally exhausted, and my stomach (which has to be nurtured all the time due to severe illness as a child) felt unsettled. I felt sick, tired, unmotivated and exhausted all round.

A week later, some proper meals inside me and taking more notice of what I am eating, and when I am eating it, has brought about a different ME. I am energised, not tired or exhausted and motivated to get on with everything.

I was never this aware of how I felt or how my body responded to food, lack of food, different foods, eating habits until I worked on me and discovered so much more about myself. I have learned that I control my destiny, I control who I am, I control what I eat and if I let go of that control I am no longer being me, I am succumbing to someone who used to be me.

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When I was going through divorce I wasn’t eating properly, I was worrying, crying and just trying to survive.  Looking back I realise I didn’t have any idea about what I was doing to my body.  I was the last thing on my mind.

Today, watching what I eat, when I eat it, how I feel, noticing my body’s reactions are now daily habits and I amaze myself with my own awareness. Of course there are slip ups, I am not perfect, and I have to fit in with working away from home etc., but in general it all works very well for me.

I have some availability for coaching clients, we just need to fix some dates if and when you want to get started. Get in touch today.

Maggie Currie 

Creedence – Confidence for You

International Confidence Coach, Motivational Speaker, Author

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