me

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How to handle the split loyalties with friends when they separate

I think we have all had this dilemma.  Who do we stay friends with after a couple divorces or separates? Hopefully you can stay friends with both parties, but that can be difficult as we are often dealing with human emotions and judgemental attitudes. Realistically, the divorcing couple will expect you to commit to one side or the other and this often establishes itself way before the final separation or divorce. This is due to our blame culture – it’s always someone else’s fault – when actually there will be many circumstances that overlap and maybe many years later after a lot of reflective thought  we realise each partner was partly to blame for the failure of that relationship. How can you handle the initial expectation to now ignore one or other former partner? It can be really tough for friends of separating partners – which one do you invite to the family party –  can you invite both? – What will happen if they meet at the family wedding? – What will happen if each one brings a new partner?

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All I can say is there is no set advice or guidance in the form of a one size fits all answer. However, common sense dictates procedures to adopt in order to ensure that your former couple remain friends long after the divorce or separation. Always try to balance being sympathetic and understanding to both friends without actually agreeing to any of their own conclusions regarding blame etc. – remember your only hearing one side of a very unbalanced perspective. Don’t reinforce any biased viewpoints – remain impartial. This will need exemplary diplomatic skills and can actually be both challenging and rewarding.

Make it clear you may still see or respond to each former partner from time to time for obvious and practical reasons. It needs to be made clear by way of simple inexplicit references with your normal conversations that this will happen. It ensures that you are not accused of being a ‘Judas’ and losing the confidence or friendship of either party when they find out that you have had contact with their former partner. Never, ever say to either party what you really thought of their former partner. Just remember that a high proportion of separating couples do actually end up getting back together again. There will of course be a whole host of anomalies that will occur that will need careful thoughtful planning on what your responses will be for each individual case of a divorcing couple. It won’t be easy. But trying to frame your responses within these guidance rules should ensure that your friendship is retained and remains flexible for most situations that may occur over the coming years.

If this has resonated with you in any way, and you would like help to make your life enhancing decisions, get in touch hello@maggiecurrie.co.uk. Work with me, improve your confidence in yourself and and see how much more you can achieve. Relearn how to live your life in the front row, re-take control of your own life. 

Many people don’t realise the importance of working with a qualified, experienced and expert coach to help rebuild their confidence in themselves. It is just as important as a mechanic for a garage or a chef for a restaurant.

Get in touch today.

Multi Award Winning Transformational Coach & Author

Southern Enterprise Awards: Most Empowering Transformation Coach 2021

Southern Enterprise Awards: Transformational Coach of the Year 2022

Website:       http://www.maggiecurrie.co.uk

Facebook:    https://www.facebook.com/maggielifecoach/

Email:          hello@maggiecurrie.co.uk

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Surrender jar

Our to-do lists, worries, plans, and dreams may be so crowded together in our heads that we don’t have room to think. There are times when our minds become too full. We may think that we are somehow taking care of our desires and concerns by keeping them at the forefront of our minds. In maintaining our mental hold on every detail, however, we may actually delay the realisation of our dreams and the resolution of our worries because we won’t let them go. At times like this, we may want to use a surrender jar. 

A surrender jar allows us to let go of our worries and desires so the universe can take care of them for us. We write down what we want or need to happen and then place the note into a jar. By writing and placing our thoughts in the jar, we are taking action and letting the universe know we need help and are willing to surrender our feelings. We give ourselves permission to not concern ourselves with that problem any longer and trust that the universe is taking care of it. You may even want to decorate your jar and place it in a special place. Your surrender jar is a sacred container for your worries. Not only do you free up space in your mind by letting go of our worries and desires and dropping them into your surrender jar but you are giving your burden over to a higher power. Once we drop our worries and desires into the surrender jar, we free our minds so we can be fully present in each moment. 

Surrendering our worries and concerns and placing them in the hands of the universe doesn’t mean that we’ve given up or have been defeated. Instead, we are releasing the realisation of our desires and the resolution of our worries and no longer concerning ourselves with their outcomes. It’s always fun to go back and pull the slips of paper out of the jar  once your requests have been granted. And it’s amazing how quickly problems go away and dreams come true when we finally let go and allow a higher power to help us. 

If this has resonated with you in any way, and you would like help to making your life enhancing decisions, get in touch hello@maggiecurrie.co.uk. Work with me, improve your confidence and and see how much more you can achieve. Relearn how to live your life in the front row, re-take control of your own life. 

Many people don’t realise the importance of securing a qualified, experienced and expert coach to help rebuild their confidence in themselves. It is just as important as a mechanic for a garage or a chef for a restaurant.

Get in touch today.

Multi Award Winning Transformational Coach & Author

Southern Enterprise Awards: Most Empowering Transformation Coach 2021

Southern Enterprise Awards: Transformational Coach of the Year 2022

Website:       http://www.maggiecurrie.co.uk

Facebook:    https://www.facebook.com/maggielifecoach/

Email:          hello@maggiecurrie.co.uk

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Change what isn’t working

We have all had the experience of realising that something in our lives is not working. This knowledge can come as a sudden realisation or a nagging feeling of doubt that grows stronger, waking us up to the fact that something needs to change. Some people have a tendency to act rashly and make sweeping changes before even understanding what the problem is. Other people fear change, so they live with the uncomfortable awareness that something needs to shift but won’t do anything about it. Between these two extreme responses lies a middle way that can help us powerfully and gracefully change what isn’t working in our lives.

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The first step is remembering that your life is made up of parts that belong to an interconnected whole. Changing one thing can change everything. Because of this, small changes often have a big effect. Sometimes much bigger changes are necessary, but the only way to know for sure is to take the time to really understand the problem. Examine your life as an entirety, your work, your relationships, where you live, and determine what specifically is not functioning the way you would like. Once you have worked out the problem, write it down on a piece of paper. For example, “I am not happy with my relationship” or “I don’t like my flat.” The next step is to work out the adjustment you would like to make and how you can go about making this change. If you are unhappy with your relationship because you spend too much or not enough time with your partner, you may want to discuss this problem with them and come up with a compromise. On the other hand, if you realise your relationship is not working to such a degree that it needs to end, begin working through that process. Writing down the truth can be a powerful catalyst for change.

The key to making changes that work is to accept the necessity of change as part of life. As we change, we may find it necessary to fine-tune our relationships, work, and living situations. Our lives are living, breathing entities that reflect our dynamic selves.

If this has resonated with you in any way, and you would like help to make some life enhancing decisions, get in touch hello@maggiecurrie.co.uk. Work with me, improve your confidence and and see how much more you can achieve. Relearn how to live your life in the front row, re-take control of your own life. 

Many people don’t realise the importance of securing a qualified, experienced and expert coach to help rebuild their confidence in themselves. It is just as important as a mechanic for a garage or a chef for a restaurant.

Get in touch today.

Multi Award Winning Transformational Coach & Author

Southern Enterprise Awards: Most Empowering Transformation Coach 2021

Southern Enterprise Awards: Transformational Coach of the Year 2022

Website:       http://www.maggiecurrie.co.uk

Facebook:    https://www.facebook.com/maggielifecoach/

Email:          hello@maggiecurrie.co.uk

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Simplifying your schedule

Few of us can be truly healthy or happy without regular periods of downtime. For many, life is a hodgepodge of never-ending commitments. While there is nothing inherently wrong with busyness, those of us who over-commit or over-extend ourselves potentially face exhaustion and burnout. When you feel overwhelmed by your commitments, examining your motivation for taking on so many obligations can help you understand why you feel compelled to do so much. You may discover that you are being driven by fear that no one else will do the job or guilt that you aren’t doing enough. To regain your equilibrium and clear the clutter from your calendar, simplify your life by establishing limits regarding what you will and will not do based on your personal priorities.

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Determining where your priorities lie can be as easy as making two lists: one that outlines all those obligations that are vital to your wellbeing, such as work, meditation, and exercise, and another that describes everything you do that is not directly related to your wellbeing. Although there will likely be items in the latter list that excite your passion or bring you joy, you may discover that you devote a large portion of your time to unnecessary activities. To simplify your schedule, consider which of these unnecessary activities add little value to your life and remove them from your agenda. Remember that you may need to ask for help, say no firmly, or delegate responsibility in order to distance yourself from such encumbrances. However, as you divest yourself of non-vital obligations that cause you stress, serve no purpose, or rob you of opportunities to refresh yourself, you will feel more energetic and enthusiastic about life in general.

If simplifying your schedule seems prohibitively difficult and you still feel pressed to take on more, try imagining how each new commitment will impact your life before saying yes. When you consider the hassle associated with superfluous obligations, you may be surprised to see that your schedule is impeding your attempts to grow as an individual. Your willingness to pare down your agenda, no matter how gradual your progress, will empower you to retake active control of the life that defines you.

If this has resonated with you in any way, and you would like help to make some life enhancing decisions, get in touch hello@maggiecurrie.co.uk. Work with me, improve your confidence and and see how much more you can achieve. Relearn how to live your life in the front row, re-take control of your own life. 

Many people don’t realise the importance of securing a qualified, experienced and expert coach to help rebuild their confidence in themselves. It is just as important as a mechanic for a garage or a chef for a restaurant.

Get in touch today.

Multi Award Winning Transformational Coach & Author

Southern Enterprise Awards: Most Empowering Transformation Coach 2021

Southern Enterprise Awards: Transformational Coach of the Year 2022

Website:       http://www.maggiecurrie.co.uk

Facebook:    https://www.facebook.com/maggielifecoach/

Email:          hello@maggiecurrie.co.uk

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Taking responsibility for your destiny

While each of us is born with a life purpose, it is up to us whether or not we will say yes to fulfilling it. There are those of us who believe that our lives are predestined and that we should resign ourselves to our lots in life. Yet the truth is that it is up to each one of us to decide what that destiny will be. And just like when we choose what to eat, who to keep company with, and whether to turn right or left when we leave our home every day, choosing to say yes to your destiny is a decision that can only be realised when you take action to make that choice a reality.

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Whether you believe it is your destiny to be a parent, an adventurer, an artist, a pioneer, or a spiritual guru, saying yes to your destiny is only the first step. While manifesting your destiny starts with knowing what you want and believing you can attain your goals, there are then the actions that must be taken and the decisions to be made before your destiny can truly happen. When you take responsibility for fulfilling your destiny and begin acting with the intention of doing so, you not only take fate into your own hands, but also you become the hands of your own fate. Doorways inevitably open for you to step through, and every choice you make can be a creative act toward realising your goals and dreams. You begin to follow your instincts and intuition, recognise opportunities when they are presented to you, and seize those golden moments. You also begin to recognise the decisions that may not serve this greater picture and can more easily push them aside.

Remembering that the decision to fulfil your destiny is always a choice can be empowering. Knowing you are fulfilling your destiny because you want to, rather than because you have to, can make a huge difference. When you are freed from obligation, obstacles in your way become challenges to be overcome, and the journey becomes an adventure rather than the obligatory steps you are being forced to take. Your destiny may be waiting for you, but whether or not you meet your destiny is up to you. Your fate is in your hands.

If this has resonated with you in any way, and you would like help to make some decisions, get in touch hello@maggiecurrie.co.uk. Work with me, improve your confidence and and see how much more you can achieve. Relearn how to live your life in the front row, re-take control of your own life. 

Many people don’t realise the importance of securing a qualified, experienced and expert coach to help rebuild their confidence in themselves. It is just as important as a mechanic for a garage or a chef for a restaurant.

Get in touch today.

Multi Award Winning Transformational Coach & Author

Southern Enterprise Awards: Most Empowering Transformation Coach 2021

Southern Enterprise Awards: Transformational Coach of the Year 2022

Website:       http://www.maggiecurrie.co.uk

Facebook:    https://www.facebook.com/maggielifecoach/

Email:          hello@maggiecurrie.co.uk

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Getting out of your own way

It is so easy to feel “stuck” or that “life” is creating obstacles preventing you from getting what you want. It is also easy to look at everyone else for the problem, perhaps even wanting to “get rid” of that person we may feel is blocking us. Often the best course of action to take is to look inside ourselves first. When you are facing obstacles that seem to be blocking you from achieving your goals, try not to get discouraged.

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Even though we truly want to succeed, there are many reasons why we may sometimes block our own efforts. It is amazing how often we can get in our own way without even being aware that is what we are doing.  It may be that we are afraid to succeed, so we subconsciously create circumstances to keep ourselves stuck. Or it may even be that we are afraid that we will succeed, so we block ourselves by making the achievement of our goals more difficult than they really are. We may even approach our goals in a way that keeps creating the same unsuccessful results.

If you believe that you’ve been getting in your own way, write down how you’ve done this. Write down the choices you’ve made that have hindered your efforts and the fears that may have prompted you to make these decisions. Take note of any thoughts and feelings that arise. It is important to be gentle with yourself during this process. Don’t blame yourself for getting in your own way. When you are finished, throw the paper away while setting an intention that you are getting rid of any obstacles you’ve created to block yourself. Start again with a clean slate. Doubts and fears are going to be natural, but with this new awareness, you should be able to prevent yourself from subconsciously thwarting yourself. Besides, now that you’ve decided to get out of your own way, the part of you that has always wanted to succeed can allow you to do just that.

If this has resonated with you in any way, and you would like to start living your life in the driving seat rather than the passenger seat, how to work with affirmations and much more, please get in touch. hello@maggiecurrie.co.uk. Work with me, improve your confidence and learn how to maintain or exit a relationship. Relearn how to live your life in the front row, take control of your own life. 

Work with me. Many people don’t realise the importance of securing a qualified, experienced and expert coach to help rebuild their confidence in themselves. It is just as important as a mechanic for a garage or a chef for a restaurant.

Get in touch today.

Multi Award Winning Transformational Coach & Author

Southern Enterprise Awards: Most Empowering Transformation Coach 2021

Southern Enterprise Awards: Transformational Coach of the Year 2022

Website:       http://www.maggiecurrie.co.uk

Facebook:    https://www.facebook.com/maggielifecoach/

Email:          hello@maggiecurrie.co.uk

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Affirmations

The words we speak and think hold great sway over the kind of life that we create for ourselves. Many people live their lives plagued by negative thoughts and never even realise this. They tell themselves and others that they are doomed to fail, not good enough, or not worthy of love, yet they are amazed when their reality starts reflecting these words. Just as the subconscious mind accepts as truth the critical statements we tell ourselves it is also equipped to instantly accept the veracity of our affirmations.

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Affirmations are statements chosen and spoken consciously. Once they enter our realm of consciousness, they also enter our subconscious mind where they have the power to change our lives. The affirmations you create should be specific, not too long, worded positively, formed in complete sentences, and spoken in the present tense as if what you are affirming is already true. It is a good idea to repeat your affirmations daily. You may want to tell yourself that you deserve to be happy or that you are in control of your destiny. Or, you may want to focus on a particular goal, such as attracting new friends. Rather than telling yourself you want to be well-liked, say, “I am well-liked.” Your subconscious mind will pick up on these positive messages, and you will begin to live your life as if what you are affirming already has happened. Soon, your reality will begin to reflect your affirmations. If you find that you are thwarting yourself with negative thinking, try repeating your affirmations several times a day. Write your affirmations down and say them aloud or in your mind. Allow your conviction to grow stronger each time you say your affirmations, and your negativity will be overridden by your motivation and positive thoughts.

Affirmations are a powerful tool for creating our desired reality. We consciously and subconsciously invite opportunity into our lives when we say affirmations. Trust in the power of your affirmations, and you will very quickly create what you have already stated to be true.

If this has resonated with you in any way, and you would like to start living your life in the driving seat rather than the passenger seat, how to work with affirmations and much more, please get in touch. hello@maggiecurrie.co.uk. Work with me, improve your confidence and learn how to maintain or exit a relationship. Relearn how to live your life in the front row, take control of your own life. 

Work with me. Many people don’t realise the importance of securing a qualified, experienced and expert coach to help rebuild their confidence in themselves. It is just as important as a mechanic for a garage or a chef for a restaurant.

Get in touch today.

Multi Award Winning Transformational Coach & Author

Southern Enterprise Awards: Most Empowering Transformation Coach 2021

Southern Enterprise Awards: Transformational Coach of the Year 2022

Website:       http://www.maggiecurrie.co.uk

Facebook:    https://www.facebook.com/maggielifecoach/

Email:          hello@maggiecurrie.co.uk

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Defence mechanisms

We all have defence mechanisms that we’ve developed over time, often without being aware of it. In times of trouble, the behaviours that have worked to get us past challenges with the least amount of pain are the ones that we repeat; even when part of us knows they no longer work. Such behaviour is a natural response from our mental and physical aspects. But because we are spiritual beings as well, we have the ability to rise above habits and patterns to see the truth that lay beyond. And from that moment on, we can make choices that allow us to work directly from that place of truth within us.

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Most of our defence mechanisms were developed in childhood; from the moment that we realised crying could get us the attention we craved. Passive aggressive ways of communicating may have allowed us to get what we needed without being scolded, punished or laughed at, so we learned to avoid being direct and honest. Some of us may have taken refuge in the lives of others, discovering ways to direct attention away from ourselves entirely. Throwing ourselves into projects or rescuing others from themselves can be effective ways to avoid dealing with our own issues. And when people are truly helped by our actions, we get the added bonus of feeling heroic. But while defences can keep away the things we fear, they can also work to keep our good from us.

When we can be honest with ourselves about what we truly desire, then we can connect our desires to the creative power of the spirit within us. Knowing that we are one with the energy of the universe allows us to release any need for defence. Trusting that power, we know that we are exactly where we are meant to be, and that challenges bring gifts of growth and experience. When we can put down arms raised in defence, then we are free to use our hands, minds, hearts and spirits to mould and shape our abundant energy to create and live our lives.

If this has resonated with you in any way, and you would like to start living your life in the driving seat rather than the passenger seat, please get in touch. hello@maggiecurrie.co.uk. Work with me, improve your confidence and learn how to maintain or exit a relationship. Relearn how to live your life in the front row, take control of your own life. 

Work with me. Many people don’t realise the importance of securing a qualified, experienced and expert coach to help rebuild their confidence in themselves. It is just as important as a mechanic for a garage or a chef for a restaurant.

Get in touch today.

Multi Award Winning Transformational Coach & Author

Southern Enterprise Awards: Most Empowering Transformation Coach 2021

Southern Enterprise Awards: Transformational Coach of the Year 2022

Website:       http://www.maggiecurrie.co.uk

Facebook:    https://www.facebook.com/maggielifecoach/

Email:          hello@maggiecurrie.co.uk

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The wonderment of life

There are many things we don’t need to do in our lives. Most of us begin our days with a continuous list of things we need to do to keep our lives running smoothly, but we rarely take time to note all the things we don’t need to do. For example, we don’t need work out how to breathe. We don’t need to find a way to make sure the earth continues to revolve around the sun. We don’t need to concentrate to ensure that our heart beats and our cells regenerate. All of these things, and many more, take care of themselves without our having to think or do anything at all. This is the miracle of life on earth. 

Beyond the wonder of the natural world, we have the wonder of human-created conditions such as indoor plumbing, electricity, cars, aeroplanes, telephones, and the Internet to name a few. Someone living just a hundred years ago would be overwhelmed by the ease with which we can communicate with people all over the world. Every day, millions of us jump on aeroplanes and fly to distant locations in a matter of hours. If we have access to a computer, we can read obscure information about any subject, free of charge, at any time of the day or night. And yet, it’s only when one of these miraculous inventions fails that we notice it at all. 

When you wake up tomorrow, take time to notice how many things are running smoothly, how many small miracles compose your day. If you wear glasses or contact lenses, as you put them on, take a moment to appreciate the fact that without them, you would be unable to see so well. Your life would be entirely different if someone hadn’t invented corrective lenses. As you take in your world, you might feel a moment of gratitude for the basic fact that, once again, the sun has risen to illuminate the abundant earth, and the earth’s gravitational field holds you and all that you hold dear in a tight, life-affirming embrace. 

If this has resonated with you in any way, and you would like to start living your life in the driving seat rather than the passenger seat, please get in touch. hello@maggiecurrie.co.uk. Work with me, improve your confidence and learn how to maintain or exit a relationship. Relearn how to live your life in the front row, take control of your own life. 

Work with me. Many people don’t realise the importance of securing a qualified, experienced and expert coach to help rebuild their confidence in themselves. It is just as important as a mechanic for a garage or a chef for a restaurant.

Get in touch today.

Multi Award Winning Transformational Coach & Author

Southern Enterprise Awards: Most Empowering Transformation Coach 2021

Southern Enterprise Awards: Transformational Coach of the Year 2022

Website:       http://www.maggiecurrie.co.uk

Facebook:    https://www.facebook.com/maggielifecoach/

Email:          hello@maggiecurrie.co.uk

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Fresh mind

We are able to learn in the blink of an eye about something that happened halfway around the world, and it’s natural for us to want to know what’s going on. However, it’s also fair to say that we don’t want to become so caught up in one way of looking at events that we lose perspective. There is a lot of information available to us at this time in history, more than ever before, and it travels fast.  Often, the news comes to us in a very fear oriented format, and when too many of us get caught up in that fear, the balance of the whole is disrupted. It helps to remember that we have a much greater and more positive impact on the world when we maintain our inner sense of peace and joy

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We are aware enough to know when we are eating something that is not good for us, because we don’t feel well after we’ve eaten it. In the same way, we can determine for ourselves whether the sources in which our information comes are equally not good for us. News can be presented in a way that inspires us to take positive action to help the world, or it can be presented in a way that leaves us feeling powerless and sad. It is up to us to seek out and support media that empowers and informs us, and to say no to media that drains our energy and our hope.

For a time, it may even be of benefit to commit to a media fast, in which we stop taking information in for a time to give ourselves a rest. When we return to the task of taking in and processing the information all around us, we will come to it with a fresh mind. This will enable us to really notice how we are affected by what we hear and see, and to make conscious choices about the sources of information that we allow into our lives.

If this has resonated with you in any way, and you would like to start living your life in the driving seat rather than the passenger seat, please get in touch. hello@maggiecurrie.co.uk. Work with me, improve your confidence and learn how to maintain or exit a relationship. Relearn how to live your life in the front row, take control of your own life. 

Work with me. Many people don’t realise the importance of securing a qualified, experienced and expert coach to help rebuild their confidence in themselves. It is just as important as a mechanic for a garage or a chef for a restaurant.

Get in touch today.

Multi Award Winning Transformational Coach & Author

Southern Enterprise Awards: Most Empowering Transformation Coach 2021

Southern Enterprise Awards: Transformational Coach of the Year 2022

Website:       http://www.maggiecurrie.co.uk

Facebook:    https://www.facebook.com/maggielifecoach/

Email:          hello@maggiecurrie.co.uk