Going through divorce often leaves you feeling that you have nobody to rely on, other than yourself. So take advantage of you and really look after yourself on this day. Turn the focus of your attention to you. Buy yourself something special, something you will really love and appreciate. It maybe something that you wouldn’t usually think of buying for yourself, but on this occasion it feels right to do it. Here are some more suggestions for you to feel special on this loving day:

• treat yourself to a day being pampered at the spa.

• treat yourself to a special meal and enjoy it in the comfort of your own home. You don’t have to cook it yourself, unless you really want to, you can order it by phone and have it delivered to your door.  Use your favourite crockery, buy a bottle of wine and enjoy your chosen feast.

• watch your favourite film or read a good book.

• How about you and some of your best friends getting together to watch a few of the worst romantic comedy films you can find.  Have a fun evening with people you love to be with and who love to be with you.

• Make some new resolutions, as most New Year resolutions are fading now.  Make a Valentine’s Day resolution to love yourself.  Resolve to take some evening classes or to go on that trip you have been promising yourself.  Resolve to try new restaurants or to try new recipes.  Make a resolution that you will make a start towards the dreams you know you want to achieve.

• If you have children why not make the day special for them as well as you.  Buy some little gifts – chocolates, stuffed toys, model cars etc. – and make a present hunt game with clues, and they can fun trying to find the gifts and you will have fun watching them.

• Organise a trip to the zoo or cinema with the children

Whatever it is you choose to do, whether it is on your own, with friends or with your children, make sure it is fun for you.

Do not:

• Find a stranger to spend the evening with.  You will regret it in the morning and make it worse for yourself when the next Valentine’s Day comes around.
• Watch tv programmes filled with loves stories.

• Get all dressed up at work as your colleagues will jump to conclusions and make your life a misery all day.

• Sit at home being miserable and feeling sorry for yourself because you don’t have someone to share this sill day with.

• Beat yourself up for feeling miserable and lonely. Anyone who has been through, or is going through, divorce has been there and had times like these.  It is never easy. Take the time to grieve and heal.  Nobody understands divorce better than those who have been through it.

A great thing to do would be to wait until February 15th and then treat yourself to a heart-shaped box of chocolates at half price, or buy some flowers for you for half price.

Remember, it is just one day, you have been through worse in your divorce.  It will all be over in the morning.

Plan your life around yourself and learn to really love yourself again.  This will not only be fun and interesting, but loving yourself is the basis of beginning your new life as the new, confident you.

I have some availability for coaching clients, we just need to fix some dates if and when you want to get started. Get in touch today.

Maggie Currie 

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