I have some feelings of inadequacy and of not being good enough. I am not sure where they are coming from but I woke up feeling that way. I do remember feeling this way when I was going through divorce and in the aftermath of that process. I didn’t like it then, and I don’t like it now.
Today I went to a breakfast business networking meeting, one I go to every Thursday morning at 7am, which means getting up at 5am to be showered and dressed for business by 6.15am at the latest. Then a 10 mile drive.
Usually these meetings are full of energy and fun and are a pleasure to be at, but today was a little different. One of our members has split with her significant other and moved off the Island and is living with her parents on the mainland. This person will be sadly missed as she is vibrant, honest, straight talking and fun. So there was an air of sadness that she has suddenly gone.
There were also some people there who were revelling in this news and making stupid comments, which I tried to ignore, but they were so unnecessary and I thought it was shameful. I said nothing as I didn’t want to get into a stupid argument.
When the meeting finished I had a couple of tasks to complete. They should have taken about twenty minutes but ended up taking nearly an hour due to ‘technical problems’. The lady who served me is also one of those people I try to avoid as she drains all the energy from me and is very critical of every one and every thing.
So instead of getting back to the office by 9am to get stuck into my work, I didn’t get back until nearly 10.30 and then I was all behind and annoyed that things didn’t work out.
I sat and thought about what it was that was making me feel inadequate. Not the fact that I was late getting back to the office. Not the fact that we had lost a great member of our networking group. So what was it? And then it came to me.
Last night I was on a fabulous phone call with three of my coach colleagues. The creativity and ideas were flowing from two of them, and what brilliant ideas they were. I am in awe of their power to think these things through so easily and clearly. I know that marketing has to be done, and I know I have to do it, but that is not my expertise.
So, I believe that I am feeling inadequate because I had absolutely nothing to add to these two brilliant coaches’ thoughts and ideas. They had done their homework fantastically and presented their ideas and innovations in clear and concise ways, and they were great ideas and I know they will work.
I feel that my strengths lie elsewhere, but at this particular moment I am not sure where.
I hate feeling this way and it makes me really upset to think this way. I know that I am a brilliant coach and that I do make a huge difference to people’s lives and that I will continue to do so.
Having written all this I am now feeling much better and know that I have a lot to offer but not necessarily in the same way as other people. I also know that I should not compare myself to other people, that is definitely a confidence killer.
So, to re-boot my confidence I have written a list of my creativity and innovativity (is that a word?) and here is the list I have come up with:
Can set out a document by eye, and it will look great on the page.
Do my accounts satisfactorily
Create a good workspace
Create opportunities for clients
Create goals for my clients and for myself
Build relationships online and in person
Think up new ways for my clients to succeed
Find new ways for me to succeed
Lead by example
Positive and encouraging to all
Hear beyond the words
I have some availability for coaching clients, we just need to fix some dates if and when you want to get started. Get in touch today.
Creedence – Confidence for You
International Confidence Coach, Motivational Speaker, Author