There are needs that often drive us to compete with others and they tend to be straightforward. We have been have shaped us to pit ourselves against our peers. The needs and desires that inspire us to compete with ourselves by years of both societal influences and evolution. However, these are entirely personal and thus far more complex. A need to outdo our earlier best efforts – to confirm that we have grown as individuals – can motivate us to strive to reach new heights of accomplishment. We are capable of using our past achievements as a foundation from which we venture confidently into the unknown. Yet if this drive to compete with our former selves is the result of low self-worth or a need to prove ourselves to others, even glowing successes can feel disheartening. Examining why we compete with ourselves enables us to positively identify those contests that will enrich our existence.
There are many reasons why we strive to outdo ourselves. When we are ambitious to grow and we are driven to set and meet our own expectations. We don’t look to external experiences of winning and losing to define our sense of self-worth. Rather, we are our own judge, monitoring our progress and gauging how successful we have become. Though we seek the thrill of accomplishment tirelessly, we do so out of a legitimate need to improve the world or to pave the way for those who will follow in our footsteps. Be careful, though, that your competitiveness is not the result of an unconscious need to show others that you are capable of meeting and then exceeding their standards.
Think too about successful efforts that would be deemed more than good enough when evaluated from an external perspective which may not satisfy our inner judge, who can drive us ruthlessly. So that we attain balance, we have to learn the art of patience even as we strive to achieve our highest vision of who we are. When we feel drained, tense, or unhappy as we pursue our goals, it may be that we are pushing ourselves for the wrong reasons. Our enthusiasm for our endeavours will return as soon as we remember that authentic evolution is a matter not of winning but of taking pride in our progress at any pace.
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Maggie Currie

Professional Transformational Coach, Consultant
Founder of MAGGIE CURRIE COACHING
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